#  >  > Travellers Tales in Thailand and Asia >  >  > China, Korea, Japan, Hong Kong and Macau Travel Forum >  >  Today in China

## slimboyfat

Well I had been told it happens, and finally (about 10 mins ago) I had a prostitute knocking on my door in a China hotel (in some place called Shantou). I turned her away though, as I have only just had a wank, and her teeth looked manky.

Also I promised God that I would be good earlier today during one of those moments you think death may be imminent. My flight from Guangzhou to Shantou took a turn for the worse about 20 mins into the flight when it was announced that we would be returning to Gaungzhou due to a mechanical problem with the plane. 
This was the first time I had experienced anything like that, and I didnt really have much confidence in the China Southern Airlines plane or pilot getting us down safely. To be frank, I was shitting it.
However, we did make it back, although the landing seemed a lot more rushed than usual. 

And 3 hours later we made the trip safely on the same (now repaired) plane.



However, if a sexier hooker comes around tomorrow night I may take her up on the offer.


For the record, the price is 600 yuan (about S$120). I don't know if thats for one shot, one hour or for the whole night.

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## momo8

50 for a massage with a happy ending/ bit more for a bj, offer 300 you're being ripped off.  :Smile:  All prices quoted in yuan.

Nice fishing place Shantou, great for all delicacies to do with seafood, have friends there with a fish farm.

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## frank barber

> "I turned her away though, as I have only just had a wank, and her teeth looked manky."
> 
> For the record, the price is 600 yuan (about S$120). I don't know if thats for one shot, one hour or for the whole night.


 
Thanks for the chuckle - I would imagine you would need at least an hour bearing in mind your earlier activities

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## jandajoy

> 50 for a massage with a happy ending/ bit more for a bj, offer 300 you're being ripped off. All prices quoted in yuan.


Is that what you charge or is it just what you've heard. Good that you're providing "professional" experienced advice though. Good girl.   :Smile:

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## Chairman Mao

All the pinkies you see - barber shops with neon pink lights - are knocking shops.

Get yourself a nice haircut, with a great head neck and shoulders massage (before and after said haircut), then a body massage out back with nice oiled up hand shandy to finish for something like 100Y. Nice way to spend 2 hours.

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## jizzybloke

> For the record, the price is 600 yuan (about S$120). I don't know if thats for 30 seconds, one hour or for the whole night.


ask her if she has a friend without manky teeth.

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## momo8

> Is that what you charge or is it just what you've heard. Good that you're providing "professional" experienced advice though. Good girl.


That's widely known JJ, better to be informed than ignorant. Many vising friends over the years and local friends who are in the know. A couple of HK colleagues go to Shenzen for sexual encounters occassionally and that's what they were quoting. 

HK is overpriced they were saying unless you go for the Filipinas of course a high class call girl would set you back a few thousand  :Smile:

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## momo8

> barber shops with neon pink lights - are knocking shops.


Go there by all means if you want to fark dirty SLAGDOGS  :Smile:  You can always ask the hotel porters, they know the best places for a hook up.

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## jizzybloke

Why isn't Rawlins sorting out SBF's sexual needs? :Smile:

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## Chairman Mao

^^ Simply a matter of distaste M.

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## The Gentleman Scamp

Well done SBF, update and photos please.

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## slimboyfat

> All the pinkies you see - barber shops with neon pink lights - are knocking shops.
> 
> Get yourself a nice haircut, with a great head neck and shoulders massage (before and after said haircut), then a body massage out back with nice oiled up hand shandy to finish for something like 100Y. Nice way to spend 2 hours.


I had my haircut a couple of days ago. There is not much left. Can I just ask for everything apart from the haircut?

Another thing, is it safe to wander alone around a city in China taking photos, or will I get arrested for spying?

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## slimboyfat

> Why isn't Rawlins sorting out SBF's sexual needs?


Here's one good reason

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## pai nai ma

OP - Common occurrence in Chinese hotels. 

However very pricey, indeed. Must be a nice hotel.

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## smeden

> Originally Posted by Chairman Mao
> 
> 
> All the pinkies you see - barber shops with neon pink lights - are knocking shops.
> 
> Get yourself a nice haircut, with a great head neck and shoulders massage (before and after said haircut), then a body massage out back with nice oiled up hand shandy to finish for something like 100Y. Nice way to spend 2 hours.
> 
> 
> I had my haircut a couple of days ago. There is not much left. Can I just ask for everything apart from the haircut?
> ...


if there is no hair to cut they migth do a polish  :Smile:

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## pai nai ma

^^^ Is he toothless?

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## slimboyfat

> OP - Common occurrence in Chinese hotels. 
> 
> However very pricey, indeed. Must be a nice hotel.


well i doubt anyone working here would go for Momo's quoted rate of 50 RMB for a massage with a happy ending. 

A bottle of water at this hotel costs 30 RMB.

50 RMB would buy 2 cans of Tsingtao from the minibar

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## terry57

> I turned her away though, as I have only just had a wank, and her teeth looked manky.




Nice work Fatboy, save your money for a nice cold beer, it lasts longer.    :Roll Eyes (Sarcastic):  

Anyway mate. you know what they say about wanking dont you ?

Nine out of ten guys wank and the tenth one is a liar. 

Some guys wank more than others and we all know who wanks the most on this forum ??

 Don't we " Aunty "       :Smile:   :Kiwi:

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## Jack meoff

Whats wrong with manky teeth?
It's not like you are going to be snogging her.

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## slimboyfat

So I had a bit of a walk around today, and found this to be another Chinese concrete city, the 5th I have been to this year and none of them have been really distinguishable from the others. Some people were friendly, and some weren't. I did not see any other foreigners outside of the Regency hotel where I am staying. I wasn't viewed as a real novelty as I had been in a couple of other places so I guess they must see some whities here. 
I only walked within 20 mins of the hotel so no doubt Momo could tell me where I should have gone, but really I only went out to find a supermarket so I could buy some reasonably priced beer and drinking water.

So here's the view from the 21st floor

 

I was walking around at 11.30 and it was fairly warm. Not quite as hot and humid as Singapore but it was getting that way.



One slightly interesting thing about this city is that there do not appear to be any traffic lights at any of the junctions. It seems to be a free-for-all. This certainly makes crossing the road a bit of a challenge. The roads themselves are very wide though.
I am not sure if it was just my imagination but it seemed that motorists kept beeping their horns at me. And ofcourse the trishaw drivers singled me out as a potential passenger but I kept on walking.





The road ran over some kind of canal with locks and stuff.







Now the lady at the hotel reception desk told me there was no supermarket within walking distance. Well I proved her wrong.....but I must admit I was a bit hot and sweaty by the time I reached Lotus Supercentre.



And this is what I bought for 217 yuan. A few bits and pieces like chinese tea cups, chopsticks, chinese tea etc for little gifts for my parents when I go back to the UK in December, a pair of pyjamas (also for the UK trip), a six pack of Heineken, a 2.50 yuan bottle of water (my hotel is selling this for 30 yuan - fuckers). 



I do still have enough cash left for a hooker but I really can't be bothered. Also it looks like I may be stuck here for the weekend as the ship I am waiting for still has no berthing prospects.

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## Wayne Kerr

Ahhh sunny Shantou. Might be there end of month. Great place, only airport in the world I've seen sex toys for sale in.

One of my old reports ... imagine it aint changed much - https://teakdoor.com/singapore-china-...urn-china.html

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## kingwilly

> HK is overpriced they were saying


yes n no.

plenty of indos in wan chai.


and SBF - you're a mad bladdy westerner walking that far!

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## slimboyfat

Bugger. I have just been informed that I will be picked up tomorrow morning and taken to the ship. So now I wonder if I should make a trip down to the sauna?

Ah sod it. I will save the yuan for the next trip out here. Anyway I have a few new pornos to watch.

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## slimboyfat

I just got a call to say that the ship has been delayed berthing so I will be here for at least another day.

So I will go to Zhongshan Park this afternoon. Apparently it is one of the four most important parks in China!

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## terry57

Throw up some more piccys Fat Boy, we all like to see your travel threads as there excellent.

cheers.

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## slimboyfat

Thanks Terry. 

And for the record I didnt have any hookers ringing my doorbell last night. I guess I must be off their hit list.

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## slimboyfat

So I went out for a walk to the supermarket again today to get another 6 pack of Heineken and some drinking water. I also had a tiny and overpriced meal at the KFC next to the supermarket. 

I took a quick video clip of the traffic system at a crossroads nearby,

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## slimboyfat

As I was walking back I thought I would take a look at that waterway that I had seen yesterday. Who knows, I thought, it may lead to the famous Zhongshan Park.

It was quite a pleasant walk, but it was around 1pm so a bit too warm, which is why I was pretty much the only person around apart from the odd bum sleeping.











After about 15 mins I got to the end of the greenery and pleasantness, and found this sign, which informed me that I had just been walking through Star Lake Park. Not what I was looking for, but it had been a nice stroll.



As well as being in Chinese and English,there was even a sign for the blind, or anyone else who prefers their notices in Braille.



I went over the back of this park to see if there was any sign of the famed Zhongshan Park, but all I could see was road in both directions.





It seems Shantou is spread over a much larger area than I had thought. So my only option was to go back to the hotel and take a cab.

So I walked back to the hotel and took a picture of it on the way.

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## slimboyfat

So I got back to my room and dumped my supplies, had a bit of a rest and then went down to get a cab to Zhongshan Park. Negotiated with the taxi driver and agreed on 30 yuan. It was a scary ride. No wonder his cab and so many dents in it.

Anyway, after about 15 mins in the cab I arrived at the park. It costs 1 yuan to get in. That's like 20 cents or something so I don't really see the point.



Your Chinese seem to go in for these impressive archway entrances.

So heres the story about the park, built in 1926 etc etc. Its not very clear written in yellow is it? Nevermind, read about it here if you want.



There is a nice map next to it, but what I was looking forward to the most was the amusing garden.

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## slimboyfat

Well it was a all rather nice place. I was the only white man yet again. It seemed to be full of families enjoying themselves and old folks exercising. Not particularly crowded either when you consider it is right slap bang in the middle of a large city.





This statue is of Mr Zhongshan I guess. There was no sign to tell me, so I assume his identity must be common knowledge in China.



These two old ladies were walking along and clapping (for exercise I assume - improving circulation maybe??)

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## AntRobertson

> Well I had been told it happens, and finally (about 10 mins ago) I had a prostitute knocking on my door in a China hotel (in some place called Shantou). I turned her away though, as I have only just had a wank, and her teeth looked manky.
> 
> Also I promised God that I would be good earlier today during one of those moments you think death may be imminent. My flight from Guangzhou to Shantou took a turn for the worse about 20 mins into the flight when it was announced that we would be returning to Gaungzhou due to a mechanical problem with the plane. 
> This was the first time I had experienced anything like that, and I didnt really have much confidence in the China Southern Airlines plane or pilot getting us down safely. To be frank, I was shitting it...


You turned down a sure thing and kacked it on a flight...

Did Singapore immigration confiscate your nads on the way out?

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## slimboyfat

Well it was in the right place on the map, so I can only assume this was the 'amusing garden'. The kids around found it quite amusing anyway. I would rate it as 'quite pleasant'.







There was also a zoo which I didn't go in. You had to pay extra, and being used to a world class zoo like the one in Singapore I didnt really expect too much from this one on the basis of the external appearance and that it had a sound system similar to a beer bar in Thailand - ie too loud and playing shite music.

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## kingwilly

> You turned down a sure thing and kacked it on a flight...  Did Singapore immigration confiscate your nads on the way out?



He's English. nuff said.

 ::doglol::

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## slimboyfat

There is a lot of water at this park, and bridges are a recurring theme.







Signs in Engrish are great aren't they? - but not very useful....unless you need the toilet or the zoo in this case



I missed out on the toast list. And the dancery.

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## slimboyfat

This statue is actually outside the park. I didn't want to go out to look more closely in case I had to pay another yuan to get in again.



This pic was taken at the 'pull boat farm'. There were loads of pedal boats but not many takers. I would have had a go myself but I was a bit concerned that my boat would just go round in circles if there is only one person in it.







I am not sure what this stone symobolises because there was no sign in English. Or even Braille.



Check out the amazing Chinese levitating boy.



Some of the trees and stuff were really cool. If you're into trees and plants and that.



I am not really sure whats going on in the statue below





Oh yeah and there was a mini-fairground for the kids I suppose. Personally I am getting old and prefer things like gardens, pyjamas and carpet slippers.



This bloke was fishing in the river. Stretched out between all those bamboo poles was a net, and every now and again he would lift it up and see if he had caught anything. 
I didn't see him catch anything.



So that was about it. I was glad to have got out of the hotel and had a nice couple of hours in the park. I managed to get a taxi no problem, but this guy went by the meter and it came out to 37 yuan (the same price as a 6 pack of Heineken!!). Still he was a lot safer than the earlier guy.

No word yet on when I will be out of here. I will probably have to find something else to do tomorrow.  :Smile:

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## Agent_Smith

Nice trip report so far, Speccy Brace Face  :Smile:   Don't they have a lounge or something in the hotel or nearby, you know, to meet that special someone for an evening?

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## slimboyfat

Unfortunately that was the end of my trip, as I actually had to work yesterday.

And yes Agent Smith, there was a KTV nightclub in the hotel, but I avoid those places unless I have a local guide. You can easily get a bill for a thousand bucks or something.

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## nidhogg

> I am not really sure whats going on in the statue below


She is saying "For the last time, when you came out of mummy you made her vagina this big.  Thats why daddy has a new mummy in Hong Kong".


Serioulsy though - nice pics.  Amazing how CLEAN it is -apparently no trash, no litter anywhere.  

Thailand to note...

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## andy55

maybye find one with no teeth at all 
just gums  :Smile: 
 nice pics btw

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## andy55

good greif! ive got a green!

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## sunsetter

after misreading the thread title in the weekly update

A visit to Shantou in China, a brush with death and a brush with a prostitute.
*Today in China*

i read it as prostitute with a brush :rofl: 
great thread mate, cool piccys green bomb on target

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## ItsRobsLife

Great pictures, but what a soul-less looking place. 

I read recently that a great percentage of historic buildings where knocked down in Mao's reign, and replaced with concrete monstrosities.

Seems the modern planners are hardly inspired.

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## theudonshawn

great post, great pics... I wanna see that whore with the manky teeth!!

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## slimboyfat

> I wanna see that whore with the manky teeth!!


I don't know Momo8 that well. You could pm her I guess, or failing that maybe KW could post a pic of her.

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## baldrick

that park reminds me of another place - I will stop being a slack cnut soon and do another china pic thread  :Very Happy: 

a six pack of heinekin ? fcuking skirt

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## ebeth

She is singing "Itsy Bitsy Spider"....

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## kwai73

> (in some place called Shantou).


My wife's ancestors are apparently from there (she's Chi-Thai). My wife's been, and described the place as pretty uninspiring.

Manky-teethed hos knocking on doors too = one less reason to go!

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## kwai73

> OP - Common occurrence in Chinese hotels.


It's quite common for hotel rooms to fucking reek of cigarette smoke, The Chinese smoke everywhere, dirthy feckers!

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