#  >  > Living And Legal Affairs In Thailand >  >  > Doing Things Legally >  >  British Consulate BKK - FUCK FUCK FUCK

## mrsquirrel

Last week I contacted the consulate in BKK to find out what to do about leagalising documents and registering my marriage with the UK. They told me clearly that I was the only person who was able to register my marriage with the UK's GRO and that my wife could not do it. However she could get my papers legalized for use in other countries.

They told me that I could register via the Seoul Embassy my documents to the GRO. 

Seoul of course today say that they can't and that I need to do it through BKk after having the fucking things Fed-ex'd here. 

I called Bangkok and asked if I can do it by post which Seoul said I could to be told no but my WIFE could come in and put them on record at the GRO. The specifically told me that they could not.

I spent 15 minutes talking to a Thai monkey who told me to look at the fucking GRO website or something like that. Maybe I would find out what to do on there or something like that. She was sure it could help me or SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

i don't pay fucking good money to be told that maybe something like that could be done. Stupid ****s

I'm more pissed off now than I have been in weeks that I have wasted the fat end of 5k fucking about with paperwork which didn't need doing.

****S ****S ****S ****S ****S ****S ****S ****S.

What the fuck do they think they are doing employing somebody to give me vague information about a fucking UK website. The fucking website clearly states that everything must be registered via the embassy of the country that i got married in.

****S

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## NickA

^Ah, you must be talking to the fat bitch who tried to give me the run around last year. She came out with some rules and when I mentioned that her rules were opposite to the rules posted on the website she got all upset. Anyway, in the end I got my way and the guy in the embassy told me not to listen to any of the Thai staff cos they don't really know what they are talking about. Which is nice to know.

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## stroller

Better than the German consulate, where you may get clueless teens shipped over from Germany for their work-practise to handle important tasks you travelled hundreds of miles to get sorted. :Mad:

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## kingwilly

^^ oh good!

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## Butterfly

Well, the good news is that all Embassies are dysfunctional. The interesting thing is Thai consulate abroad however seems to be very efficient. Embassies are a world of their own.

I am dealing now with a Eastern Europe consulate for a specific project, and I tell you the dysfunctionality there is beyond comprehension. Basically the rules are the discretion of the VISA officer. How could we let those fucks get into the EU ? Maybe the UK is right to leave the dysfunctional EU as it's not improving with stupid communist countries.

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## klongmaster

> Well, the good news is that all Embassies are dysfunctional


have to disagree with you here 'fly...

I'm a kiwi and I have to say that I have never received the run-a-round from my embassy...staff are efficient and knowledgeable...Thai staff speak good English being NZ-educated (!)...

sure there have been some hiccups over the years, like the Thai guy who was giving visas for backhanders and the Canadian woman who was the butt of many complaints...but both situations were firmly dealt with...

my lasting image of the NZ Embassy was at some function there and going into the gents toilet  only to find the Ambassador completely drenched and holding onto a burst water main...seems he had flushed the urinal and the pipe just broke away in his hand...

I offered  to hold the pipe while he got help but he said it was a bit silly for both of us to get soaked so  off I went  to find how to turn off the water main...good sort he was...gone now of course as they change every so often...especially when the government changes...

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## NickA

^To be fair, I've dealt with the British Embassy about 5 or 6 times and this was the only time I had any problems. They've now moved the visa section somewhere else anyway.

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## peterpan

> Originally Posted by Butterfly
> 
> Well, the good news is that all Embassies are dysfunctional
> 
> 
> have to disagree with you here 'fly...
> 
> I'm a kiwi and I have to say that I have never received the run-a-round from my embassy...staff are efficient and knowledgeable...Thai staff speak good English being NZ-educated (!)...
> 
> ...


 I gotta second that, when I hear the stories of other embassies I am quite happy to be born where I was. All the dealings I have had with the NZ embassy have been satisfactory to excellent. Only had one slight problem when they were dealing with a visa for my wifes sister to accompany us, the Thai staff  were dithering a little over the decision, so I asked for it to be moved up one level where it was dealt with on the spot with a firm "Yes, OK". 
On one occasion I left my passport there by accident, the Kiwi guy who  was dealing with it offered to come around in his lunch break to hand deliver it for me.

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## Butterfly

NZ doesn't count, it's not even a country, right ?  :Very Happy:

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## klongmaster

> NZ doesn't count, it's not even a country, right ?


God's Country...

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## kingwilly

> NZ doesn't count, it's not even a country, right ?


gotta green fer dat butterfly!

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## mrsquirrel

Who can I write to and complain about the incompetent turds? They have been ok upto this point but it's a fucking pest now

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## kingwilly

Santa Claus for all the good it would do!

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## sledge

cook some NZ lamb chops last night for tea, bloody good

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## kingwilly

^ with mint sauce i hope!

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## sledge

Na will have to try and find some for next time.   The wife got the papaya pop pop salad mixing bowl out and crushed garlic and pepper corns. She also wanted to put this white sugerly shit with it which they seem to put in everything. Does anyone know what it is?  MSG I think.

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## slimboyfat

the British High Commission in Singapore is very nice.

well i only renewed my passport but i always got a smile from the gurkhas on guard

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## dirtydog

Mrs Q, start a website  :Smile:  www.notUKembassyINbkk.wnkers

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## Spin

> the guy in the embassy told me not to listen to any of the Thai staff cos they don't really know what they are talking about


I'm sure the Thai staff are competent officers and this gentleman was just having a bad day :Roll Eyes (Sarcastic):

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## Wallalai

> The wife got the papaya pop pop salad mixing bowl


Isn't it the "papaya pok pok" ?

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## Spin

> Does anyone know what it is?


Yep its MSG, Thailand is quietly totally addicted to it

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## klongmaster

> the British High Commission in Singapore is very nice.
> 
> well i only renewed my passport but i always got a smile from the gurkhas on guard


Yes Commonwealth countries have High Commissions, non-commonwealth countries have Embassies...

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## NickA

> I'm sure the Thai staff are competent officers and this gentleman was just having a bad day


No, the guy didn't say the Thais were useless, he basically said that they were only there as inbetweens and therefore didn't really know (and weren't trained to know) the rules and regulations of the embassy.

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## mrsquirrel

^ or SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

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## sledge

> Isn't it the "papaya pok pok" ?


yeh you're right

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## Marmite the Dog

Quirrel. Take a look here for what it's worth.

Complaints British Embassy, Bangkok

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## DrAndy

[quote=klongmaster;295215]going into the gents toilet only to find the Ambassador completely drenched and holding onto a burst water main...seems he had flushed the urinal and the pipe just broke away in his hand...
[quote]


yeah, yeah  we have all heard the rumours of that NZ guy in the toilets

no wonder he is not there any more

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## a. boozer

[QUOTE=DrAndy;297456][quote=klongmaster;295215]going into the gents toilet only to find the Ambassador completely drenched and holding onto a burst water main...seems he had flushed the urinal and the pipe just broke away in his hand...



> yeah, yeah  we have all heard the rumours of that NZ guy in the toilets
> 
> no wonder he is not there any more


No doubt flushed by his own success!

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## Troubled

> ^To be fair, I've dealt with the British Embassy about 5 or 6 times and this was the only time I had any problems. *They've now moved the visa section somewhere else anyway*.


It has been outsourced has it not?

Private sector cheaper and more efficient erm...

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## The Bold Rodney

I agree its sometimes difficult dealing with any consulate or officials especially when they are staffed by none nationals whichever country you're in.

But when I dealt with the Wankers in Dublin it was nothing short of a nightmare and I was dealing with a home grown C*NT!.

The immigration officer who dealt with my request for a viza for my wife and wrote back to me was not only stupid, racists, ignorant, illiterate and completely full of shit... guess what? She quoted ...."The interpretation of the rules are at the sole discretion of the immigration officer dealin with the case in hand".

I wrote back and politely pointed out the errors she had made and told her that she could stick their Irish visa together with the application forms, bank statements, photo copies, etc. etc. etc. where the sun doesn't shine.

Saying that...the Irish consulate in Bangkok (staffed by Thais) couldn't have been more helpful and I've never had any problems with the UK embassy either.

So I suppose the moral of the story is... the treatment you receive depends solely on the ignorant, illiterate  C*NT you're dealing with and they're usually NOT Thais :UK: !

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## FlyFree

> ^ with mint sauce i hope!


The reason you have to use mint sauce on NZ lamb is because without it is so God-awful.

Again, a matter of what you know. If you don't know Karoo lamb, you'd believe NZ lamb is good.

Something I always wondered about. Making love to sheep seems ok down that end of the world, what about fucking lamb. Is that accepted or classed at peadophilia?  :cmn:

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## Happyman

British Embassies/ High Commissions/ consulates

Very efficient     Kuala Lumpur
Total arseholes  Algiers
Most enjoyable  Asmara Eritrea ( was ME!) always welcomed the rare travellers
                                           passing through with a large glass of Melotti 
                                           brandy on ice- also a good excuse to have a decent
                                           lunch at the only good restaurant in town on 
                                           consulate operating expense account
                                           Errr ! did I mention that stamps in passports were 
                                           freely available upon receipt of a few packs of 
                                           Benson & Hedges ciggies (the local baccy rolled in 
                                           toilet paper were absof*ckinlutely dreadful )

Temporary consul ( only Brit in town ) during civil war - mid 70's  :UK:  

 :smiley laughing:

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## Pink Panty

I was used the service of thai agency to do legally married with the uk. They're cost me only 3000 bath ( this price is 3 year ago) It will done in 5 working day. If you're in the rush time the price will hit 10000 bath. Its very easy all you do only prepare all the document what they're need, and sigh the married certificate then done! All is done in 1 week and you're don't have to run around bkk.  :Smile:

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## nidhogg

> the British High Commission in Singapore is very nice.
> 
> well i only renewed my passport but i always got a smile from the gurkhas on guard


I went there a while ago to get something legal done ( a document notarized by the embassy maybe?).  We had checked first and been told  - no problem.  So half day off work, ruck up to the window to be told "we don't do that".  Fuming.  Turned around was getting ready to walk out, and there on the wall was a document stating explicitly that they DID to that service, with certain caveats.  Took it off the wall - gave it to the girl and asked to see her boss NOW.
Lots of appologies later, job done.

Problem is, the window staff are lowly peons, and often not well informed.

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## mr Fred

I have found two things to be constant.
Paper pushing officials are dick heads and shit stinks.
Two things that will never change.

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## slackula

I have had very negative experiences over the years dealing with Brit embassies in various countries.

They only seem to be interested in acting as extensions of the Board of Trade and protecting the interests of HMG, we citizens needing services are an inconvenience and a nuisance.

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## DrAndy

> They only seem to be interested in acting as extensions of the Board of Trade and protecting the interests of HMG, we citizens needing services are an inconvenience and a nuisance.


now that the fees have massively increased, I am sure they will be polite and subservient

5555

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## kingwilly

Timely bump, funny how some things never change

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## English Noodles

> Saying that...the Irish consulate in Bangkok (staffed by Thais) couldn't have been more helpful


That's because it's an Honorary consulate and depends on your business to keep them in a job, ultimately it is the Irish Embassy in KL that is responsible for Thailand.

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## Happyman

^

Same as the Asmara consulate - was run by the excellent one in Khartoum Sudan

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## November Rain

Wish I'd seen this thread before I left Thailand. The British Consulate in BKK are largely responsible for the trouble I've had with littl'un.

I asked them if it were possible for littl'un to leave Thailand with me & was told categorically that I would have to adopt him first. I was told by someone else that there might be a special case, seeing as I'd been his mum for so long, so I went back & specifically asked them that. Many emails, tearful & angry (both me) phone calls & conferences with the Thai Child Welfare bureau (whom I'd also visited) I was told there was no way I could get him into UK without adopting him in UK first. I still have the emails.

On arriving back in UK & finding that UK social services would not assist with adoption until he was in UK, I started looking for lawyers. In my search, I was shown some UK immigration documents, a clause of which clearly states that if a British national has been parent (not necessarily legally adoptive) to a child for a continuous 6 months or more prior to application (in my case it was 6 years parenting), the child can get a UK visa.

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## Beadle

I must admit in all my dealings with the British Embassy they have been efficient, helpful and polite.

I'd love to be able to write a long, whinging post about them but alas, I cannot. 

They only thing I can think of to slate them is that they sold the adjacent land and it is now a fun fair complete with Ferris Wheel and Dodgems. 

How the mighty have fallen.

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## klongmaster

> They only thing I can think of to slate them is that they sold the adjacent land and it is now a fun fair complete with Ferris Wheel and Dodgems.


Yup and the poor old Queen has been moved again...remember the Japs dumped her outback during their stint here...

where is she now, anyone?..

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## Kurgen

> NZ doesn't count, it's not even a country, right ?


It's a sheep station, isn't it ?

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## Donnyrover

> Originally Posted by Butterfly
> 
> NZ doesn't count, it's not even a country, right ?
> 
> 
> God's Country...


It can't be god's country as God's own county is The 3 Riding's of Yorkshire, thus his country is England (QED).

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## superman

> Originally Posted by slackula
> 
> They only seem to be interested in acting as extensions of the Board of Trade and protecting the interests of HMG, we citizens needing services are an inconvenience and a nuisance.
> 
> 
> now that the fees have massively increased, I am sure they will be polite and subservient
> 
> 5555


I've been dealing with the British Embassy for a number of months now and I find them to be incompetent liars. If you wish to complain about them you have to do it through the Embassy themselves first. What chance have you of getting a result when they investigate themselves ? I've already complained once to the Foreign & Commonwealth office in the UK to no effect. Fcuk the lot of them.

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## weewillywinkie

British Embassy/Consulate no longer exists for the benefit of the average punter, but exists to promote trade and British Companies. In the little booklet from the FCO, the first 23 pages describe what they cannot/will not do, and the 24th page describes what they will.

Now that they have chucked the "renew passport function" out to Hong Kong, I can see no reason to involve them.

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## superman

^ Unfortunately I'm dealing with a government department in the UK where I'm allowed to be refunded with my expenses/costs. Due to my receipts being in Thai, the Embassy is used as a go between, and my refunds are paid through them. The UK department will not deal with me direct. The Embassy seem reluctant in helping and are a fcuking pain to deal with.

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## VocalNeal

> So I suppose the moral of the story is... the treatment you receive depends solely on the ignorant, illiterate  C*NT you're dealing with and they're usually NOT Thais!


I'm sure the staff have the same view. :mid:

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## dobella

Nice to know that the UK citizens that have difficulties in Thailand have a stromg support system there to help. - NOT.
The males are probably hung over from a night on Patpong and the females are so jealous of their female Thai counterparts that guys from the UK that want to hook with a bride, they just throw a spanner in the works.
I remember when the PAD occupied Swampy airport and most nations supported their nationals in need but the UK were totally negligent to their desperate needs even with medicines for the elders and help for the babies.
Seems nothing has changed then, just out there on a jolly.

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## Troy

Why do you want to register it with the GRO?

UK accepts the original Thai marriage certificate with a certified translation. That's all you need to do legally.

Having recently had dealings with the UK and German Embassies in BKK, I would say the UK Embassy was head and shoulders and waist and knees and ankles above the German Embassy...

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## superman

I dread to think how bad the German Embassy is.

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