#  >  > Living And Legal Affairs In Thailand >  >  > Thai Visas and Visa Runs >  >  UK Visa - Fuk the embassy is shit

## dirtydog

Now next summer I want to go back to the UK for a couple of weeks, my son I want to stay longer to improve his English, obviously the Brit embassy wants to see some money so the nasty little brown buggers go home, so I sent this email.




> Hi, I am a British passport holder, my son who is now 18 years old is a Thai passport holder and doesn't have UK citizenship xxxxxxxxxxx, anyway come summer, June to August I will be visiting the UK for 2 weeks over that period, I would also like to take my son but want him to stay for 4 to 6 weeks to improve his English, he will be staying with my mother, obviously at 18 he has no proof of money or anything, at present he is in college and will probably after finishing college spend the next few years in university, so, on applying for his visa he needs an income source or a reason to come back to Thailand, I have a couple of plots of land in Thailand worth a few million baht, would putting those in his name sort out this problem? Or setting up a company and paying him a salary be better? If the salary is better how much should I pay him?


Ok from there email land aint going to do it.




> Required documentation regarding financial evidence for social visit visa would include personal bank statements and saving books (containing details for the last six months), or any proof of a savings history.
> 
> 
> 
> There is no set amount of funds the Embassy requires. However, the financial evidence you provide should illustrate adequate funds to cover the return flight and accommodation and reasonable expenses, such as sightseeing costs, travel, transport etc for the applicant for the period he/she wishes to remain in the United Kingdom.


Pretty much a generic email, but how much is enough funds?

My second reply from them.




> Dear, Sir/Madam
> 
> 
> 
> Thank you for contacting the UK Border Agency Visa Information Service in Bangkok.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ...


So now I am at the stage where I want to know how much will keep them happy, it really don't make much difference as we all have access to a main account in my girlfriends name, but they don't accept that, so all I want to know is how much money they want me to run thru the account...

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## dirtydog

Now I don't mind running money thru his bank accounts, I do that for my girlfriend when I get big payments to up her credit standing, albeit very rarely  :Sad:  and its only 6 months, but I got to run money thru his accounts for 6 months so he can do a social visit to the uk, I mean we all know the cash flow is fake, I stated in the first email that he didn't have an income, are they going to fuck him for the visa?

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## dirtydog

My last email to them.




> Hi, please stop wasting mine and your time, his flight with his return ticket will be paid for, he will be staying at my mothers so there is no accommodation charges, so how much should I pay into his account over the next 6 months, I do not want to live in the UK and haven't been back for nearly 20 years, I'm pretty sure my son doesn't want to live there as he has never been there, so please, just give me a figure where you will look at his account and say that is acceptable, obviously realising this isn't his money and just money I have stuck in his account as a British citizen.

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## Thormaturge

You did well getting a reply at all.

I have been waiting for a reply to a message I sent in September.

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## samran

obvious question - if he is your son, why not get him a British passport and save yourself the ongoing grief of having to deal with the embassy?

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## dirtydog

^I am not married.

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## rawlins

^ I am not married to my other half but we still got our baby a UK passport and registered in the UK...

Not sure if there is a time limit to get a kid a passport though - suspect 18 years would be over any limit, if there is one....

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## dirtydog

> You did well getting a reply at all.


if you don't get a reply best to take the site down, although I think this maybe illegal now.

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## Thormaturge

> Originally Posted by Thormaturge
> 
> You did well getting a reply at all.
> 
> 
> if you don't get a reply best to take the site down, although I think this maybe illegal now.


Not something I could do personally...although I know a man who can.  ahem

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## dirtydog

Yep, at the time we was lucky to get him him Thai nationality, they didn't want farang sperm produced kids listed as Thai

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## blue

is he going on a summer language course ?, 
if so he need a  'student visitors visa,'
 full time students in london , need to have  £800 pounds a month,
perhaps its similar for a normal tourist visa , in either case 
he could show an offer from a Thai university as his reason to return home .

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## dirtydog

> I am not married to my other half but we still got our baby a UK passport


The marriage laws have now changed and if I'm willing to whack up 40k baht they may consider he has a chance of being english, ie I whack u 40k baht and then they decide, may aswell throw that money out in the street really.

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## dirtydog

> is he going on a summer language course ?,


His english is real good, so its only staying with my mom.

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## dirtydog

Basically all I want to know is how much to run thru his account each month, this is like some big dark secret.

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## Little Chuchok

^Why don't you call them?

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## Thormaturge

> ^Why don't you call them?


ROFL


Wait until you need a new passport, that's even more fun.

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## dirtydog

I am emailing them you dumb kiwi, you had a shag yet?

Passports are done in Hong Kong.  :Sad:

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## dirtydog

This is the dumb thing, they know it is fake, I know it is fake, but the money keeps rolling in, but the fuks wont tell me how much.

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## FailSafe

I went to the US Embassy on Monday to renew my passport- couldn't have gone smoother- called 'em a couple times with questions beforehand and they picked up the phone right away and told me exactly what I needed to know.

You Limeys need to get it together. :Smile:

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## Thormaturge

> Passports are done in Hong Kong.


Yep, got mine renewed recently.  

Given another five years and the UK Government will be outsourced to China to save spending all that money running the Houses of Parliament..

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## dirtydog

Sometimes it is better to be merican, but I want to see where this goes, Im willing to bet they try and fuck me.

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## Boon Mee

Not to get off-topic here but the 'Merkin Embassy Consular Affairs department is total shit too.  Rude, extremely crowded even if you have an appointment.  I absolutely hate having to go there...

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## dirtydog

I am asking a real simplistic thing, ie my son get 4 to 6 weeks in the UK, all I want to know is how much they want in his bank account over the next 6 months, real simple really.

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## dirtydog

It could be worse,  I might want to take my girlfriend back. they would ask what toothbrush is hers, fuked if I know, not sure which is mine.

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## dirtydog

My last email from them.




> Thank you for contacting the UK Border Agency Visa Information Service in Bangkok.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> There is no set amount of funds the Embassy requires. However, the financial evidence you provide should illustrate adequate funds to cover the return flight and accommodation and reasonable expenses, such as sightseeing costs, travel, transport etc for the applicant for the period he wishes to remain in the United Kingdom. We hope you find this information helpful.


So, how much to run thru his account every month?

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## Gerbil

You're not going to get a straight answer from them on this.

Every case is on its own merits.

Last time I took the wife and daughter back to the UK (about eight years ago - we didnt submit any financial evidence for them - except for the house in her name).

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## FailSafe

That's the complete opposite of my recent experience there- in-and-out (with an appointment, but the wait wouldn't have been that bad without one) in less than 30 minutes, and the people I dealt with (Thai and American) were polite and professional.




> Not to get off-topic here but the 'Merkin Embassy Consular Affairs department is total shit too. Rude, extremely crowded even if you have an appointment. I absolutely hate having to go there...





> I went to the US Embassy on Monday to renew my passport- couldn't have gone smoother- called 'em a couple times with questions beforehand and they picked up the phone right away and told me exactly what I needed to know.  You Limeys need to get it together.

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## blue

> My last email from them.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 			
> 				Thank you for contacting the UK Border Agency Visa Information Service in Bangkok.
> 
> ...



just put the truth- he's a student , you support  him , and give him plenty of spending money for his trip

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## smeden

as danish i know the rules for my country the day i have my pension and not have to work the rules is i can stay in thailand 6 month and than i have to go back to dk but i also have to have an adres where my post can go to  it is ro know the rules of vhat ever country you come from  ::chitown::  :Smile:  :Smile:  :Smile:  :Smile:  :Smile:  :Smile:  :Smile:  :Smile:

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## peterpan

> ^Why don't you call them?


Not a problem for us is it LC?
All my dealings with the NZ embassy have been a pleasure, helpful and friendly people, 
In fact bending backwards  over helpful,  :cmn: 



no crowds, no paki's or Arabs in the que. 


Excellent.

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## Thormaturge

> no crowds, no paki's or Arabs in the que.


That can be arranged.

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## hazz

You are very unlikely to get an answer you want from the embassy; mainly because all internal government information is confidential; even the colour of the toilet paper, unless they are told its not. The official secrets act is not very nice

You need to find out if your son is or can be registered as a british citizen through decent. If he has citizenship through decent then visiting the UK is going to be much easier for him. His age and your marriage status might be issues through.

if he is visiting as a thai national then you are going to have to apply, as you say for a visitors visa to spend time with your mom. Given that he's a student and therefore still your dependent then I would expect that they would be fare more interested in the ability of you and your mom to support his visit.

At the end of the day the judgement call they will make is can he afford to live in the UK for the duration of his visit, will he return to thailand before his visa ends and is he visiting to uk for the reason he has given. The evidence you need to give is any evidence they do and don't ask for that will provide yes and answers to these questions. 

citizenship through decent for people born outside the UK to british fathers or mothers is surprisingly complex. anyone who has or si going to have children under these circumstances  needs to read this form BN1

best of luck,

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## DrAndy

just stick a couple of million in, DD

that should do it

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## Thormaturge

> You Limeys need to get it together.


It is all part of a master plan.

First we outsource everything to Asia.

Then we all move here.

Leaving the lousy weather and high prices for the Pakistanis and Poles to enjoy.

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## Pol the Pot

Fight the system, good one!

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## Davis Knowlton

^^Plan!!!!

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## Marmite the Dog

> decent


I think you mean 'descent', or is that how it is spelt using Simplified English?

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## prefabs

You could always ask Andrew Drummond to start a press campaign on your behalf

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## dirtydog

> Given that he's a student and therefore still your dependent then I would expect that they would be fare more interested in the ability of you and your mom to support his visit.


Doesn't seem so, my mother is a retired ex civil servant and house owner, they haven't asked about that, it's quite obvious from the emails I have sent them that I shall just be running money thru his account, he aint going to be able to afford a UK holiday on his 140baht perday pocket money, although a couple of weeks ago he was earning a staggering 200baht perday doing some work experience with his college for a few days, just seems real dumb that I have to build 6 months worth of credit rating for him when he doesn't want credit and just needs a small lump sum.

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## klong toey

To be classed as a university student in the U.K you need to be a minimum of £10,000 in debt.So surley he needs hardly any money in his account or just use a simple guide of £30 a day for expenses.
Basically the Embassy are saying its up to you,plus it office party time and they are more interested in their G&T and the short time office shag.

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## klong toey

This is from the U.K Border agency web site.

Your husband, wife, civil partner or eligible partner and children under 18 can join you as your dependants in the UK if:
they have a visa for this purpose *and*you can support them without any help from public funds.  You need  £533 for each dependant accompanying or joining you in the United  Kingdom, and that money will need to be in your, or their personal  bank  account for a minimum of three months before the date of their  application.

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## dirtydog

> You need £533 for each dependant accompanying or joining you in the United Kingdom


Per week?

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## Fondles

> Passports are done in Hong Kong.


I thought you wanted a visa ?

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## dirtydog

He has more than that in his account anyway, my girlfriend is a real bitch and makes him save any money he gets, pretty sure at 18 he has better ideas on what to spend his money on, I don't tell her when I give him money as she would make him stick it in the bank.

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## dirtydog

> I thought you wanted a visa ?


I don't want nor need a visa, my son needs a visa.

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## dirtydog

> and children under 18


He's over 18, so doesn't fit into those catergories, it would be so much easier if they just said, "stick x amount of cash into his account on so and so day".  :Sad:

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## klong toey

> Originally Posted by klong toey
> 
> and children under 18
> 
> 
> He's over 18, so doesn't fit into those catergories, it would be so much easier if they just said, "stick x amount of cash into his account on so and so day".


Its a nightmare of poor information you need a lawyer to verify the mess of bureaucratic,rules and regulations.But as usual a piece simple information is either missing or hidden.Somewhere below is the information you need. 
  The UK Border Agency 
Croydon Public Caller Unit
Lunar House
40 Wellesley Road
Croydon CR9 2BY
Phone: (+44) (0)870 606 7766 (general enquiries)
Phone: (+44) (0)870 241 0645 (application forms)
Email: indpublicenquiries[at]ind.homeoffice.gsi.gov.uk
www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk

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## dirtydog

> you need a lawyer to verify the mess of bureaucratic,rules


Thats what they said when I wanted to register his birth etc, they reckoned it would take 2 years to adopt my own son even though I am listed as the father on the birth certificate, obviously I had problems with the Thai side of it aswell, so I reported the whole family as dead, that sorted out the Thai side and got him registered on the house papers, sadly they came back to life about a year and a half ago, that was a bit embarrassing to say the least after being dead for god knows how many years, obviously by then it didn't matter as he was 16 already, all part of the joys of living in Thailand  :Sad:

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## Fondles

> Originally Posted by Fondles
> 
> I thought you wanted a visa ?
> 
> 
> I don't want nor need a visa, my son needs a visa.


Yeah I know, I was curious as to why you mentioned they issue passports in HK ??

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## dirtydog

^Because they do, also I need a new passport as mine is full, pretty sure in the UK they are cheaper than the 250 quid they charge in Hong Kong.

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## klong toey

> ^Because they do, also I need a new passport as mine is full, pretty sure in the UK they are cheaper than the 250 quid they charge in Hong Kong.


Might be easier to do in Hong Kong.
 Non-UK residents and those temporarily outside the UK
If you do not live in the UK, you can apply in person to renew your passport while visiting the UK.
IPS cannot accept applications from overseas. If you would like to renew your British Passport while outside the UK, you will need to contact your local embassy, high commission or consulate.
Renewing your passport in the UK if you live abroad
You can renew, amend or replace your passport whilst youre visiting the UK. You should apply to the Identity and Passport Service.

Youll need to make an appointment, provide a verifiable residential address, and be able to attend any interviews as required by IPS. Youll have to be available at this address so you can sign for the passport. Please note that IPS do not accept applications by post or email from abroad.

It seems you need to make a visit to them,rather then renew by post.

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## samran

> Originally Posted by rawlins
> 
> I am not married to my other half but we still got our baby a UK passport
> 
> 
> The marriage laws have now changed and if I'm willing to whack up 40k baht they may consider he has a chance of being english, ie I whack u 40k baht and then they decide, may aswell throw that money out in the street really.


You can pass on nationality even though you aren't married - they changed the laws a couple of years back.

I think you are being a bit harsh given that the visa people are pissing you about. Of course the official rules are going to say 'consider' - what governments are going to guarantee anything? The fact of the matter is however that there are few surer things so long as he is your real son - he'll be given UK nationality no worries.

As for the 40K - I don't understand why this is an issue - you are looking to recycle the monies over 6 months to get him a visa, when you could just pay it out now and ensure that he'll never need a visa for travel for the rest of his life if you got him a Brit passport. 

Why not give The Scouser a email over at TV - he's a proper immigration lawyer for the UK and he hates the embassy staff more that you do. Whats more, he's good at giving free advice which will get you over the line.

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## hazz

^I kind of assumed at you could pass you nationality through decent too. But it's a bit more complicated than that, if you were born between 1983 and 2006 your father must have been married to your mother at your birth for you to get British citizen ship by decent. if your parents marry at a later date, that might (to use the BA's word) work. Just another example of margaret the misery maker doing what she did best back in the 80's

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## Marmite the Dog

> through decent too


Through a decent what?

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## dirtydog

> The fact of the matter is however that there are few surer things so long as he is your real son - he'll be given UK nationality no worries.


When I read the website a year or so ago it seemed there was a good chance of being turned down, if he got turned down for a passport I doubt he would ever be able to get a visa for the UK, as hazz said, the years and marriage make a great deal of difference in your application.

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## hazz

Given that marriage has not been the institution it was for many many decades it seems very  unfair to me that people born before 2006 should be treated so differently than those after. Hopefully that would make them more generous when looking a post birth marriages.

I think you a right about a failed attempt to get citizenship screwing up future visa applications. But I would have thought I would not be such an issue, if he has been to the uk before and complied with the visa .

It might be worth approaching the BA and asking about how getting married now would affect citizenship rights for your son; as in BN1 they say this can fix he issue without giving any details of when it will and will not help. And you can do this without them knowing who you are so it won't affect any visa apps. That assumes you are prepared to play their silly little games of telling you how to live your life.  Grrrrrrr

As I say all the best with the app.

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## dirtydog

> I think you are being a bit harsh given that the visa people are pissing you about.


I don't think I am being harsh, my son goes to college 5 days per week so hasn't got time to work for a living, and if he did work it would be nothing money, so ok I will play the game and run money through his account for 5 or 6 months, hell, I would have stuck one of the plots of land in his name if that would have made them happy, been thinking about giving him the small plot anyway so it really makes no difference to me, the small plot is valued by the land office at around 2 million baht, not that I believe them but thats what they reckon on the percentage they make in tax for that area, pretty sure people are inflating the prices they pay to get larger bank loans, I would be happy to sell that plot at 1.5 million and would have made well on it, so I really got to think that people are inflating the prices paid purely for bank loans.

So, I can use my company and pay him a salary and he pays tax, or I can just run the money through his account, obviously this still comes down to it being money run through his account, aint no changing the fact he doesn't work for a living, they ask where does the money come from what does he say? I run say 20k baht per week through his account leaving say 4k baht per week in it each time to build up and they ask what does he spend all that on what does he say?

He spends 140baht perday plus if he wants more money we just give it to him, they aint going to give him a visa on his pocket money.

So we are left with the ridiculous situation of faking his accounts for 6 months which will be quite obvious to the visa office, will they refuse the visa because it is obviously not really his money running through the accounts, although obviously he will be given money for his holiday and I will pay his flights etc, but they will know he don't actually work for a living and just goes to college, they got to ask where the money comes from, I can see it now at the interview, "Yeah, my dad runs it thru my account to keep you idiots happy". That aint going to look so good, but thats the truth, or maybe he could tell them he is great at managing his 140baht perday pocket money and has built it up into a 20k baht per week income?

I remember a Pattaya mayor who was running a new mercedes, they asked how he could afford it on his 10k baht per month salary, this was many years ago, he said his wife was good at the house keeping money, UK visa office aint going to fall for shit like that  :Smile:

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## dirtydog

> It might be worth approaching the BA and asking about how getting married now would affect citizenship rights for your son;


I am not a religious person, at present I can't see any financial benefits to getting married to my girlfriend, infact it may cause complications in other things, so I am not getting married, hell, I've been with her for like 16 or 17 years, I'm sure she knows exactly how many to the day she has had to put up with me, most likely she wouldn't even want to marry me  :Smile:  but I aint getting married for a poxy visa nor am I going to start going to church.

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## Bower

DD, when exiting the UK after your visit,register for 'Iris' recognition at the airport.
You will then not need to join the queues at immigration when entering the UK in future, also it would seem that any passport affairs or visa enquiries become suddenly quicker and easier !

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## dirtydog

Blimey iris scans, thats as bad as america, they also do fingerprint aswell, I had real trouble with the finger print though, seems my index finger is too long, real problem bending it up enough to go in the scanner, but i don't plan on making the UK a regular holiday destination, once every 20 years is more than enough.

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## blue

he's not applying to move there right ?
its just a tourist visa or family visitor visa
think you are   making it more complicated than need be
he's a student -dont need to pretend he has an income
,  puts down you are sponsoring his trip
his reasons for returning are his education , and he's a  property owner in Thailand,
nothing to worry about

''In the 12 months to July visits by overseas residents to the UK rose 6% from 31.2 million to 32.9 million, the Office for National Statistics (ONS) said.''

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## dirtydog

Missed this email from them.




> Dear, Sir/Madam
> 
> 
> 
> Thank you for contacting the UK Border Agency Visa Information Service in Bangkok.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ...

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## Norton

I don't see why you need to specify how much money he will be given or worry about money in his bank.

Just read the application for family visit. He is a student going to UK to visit his grandmother with his father (both UK citizens). You (his) father will accompany him and pay all his expenses. While staying with his grandmother you and she will pay all his expenses. 

Apply for 6 month visa. No need for you to say anything about returning before him.

Am I missing something here?

http://www.ukvisas.gov.uk/resources/.../1903073/VAF1B

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## dirtydog

Jees.



> 6.11 In times of either peace or war have you ever been >>>
> involved in, or suspected of involvement in, war crimes, crimes
> against humanity or genocide? Put a cross (x) in the relevant box

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## PlanK

Jailing EnglishNoodleDick is not a crime against humanity.

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## Norton

> 6.11 In times of either peace or war have you ever been >>> involved in, or suspected of involvement in, war crimes, crimes against humanity or genocide? Put a cross (x) in the relevant box


Don't worry DD, the question is directed at your son, not you. :Wink:

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## dirtydog

Our secret jail is well hidden from their prying eyes, although Bush probably said the same thing  :Smile:

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## chitown

> Not to get off-topic here but the 'Merkin Embassy Consular Affairs department is total shit too.  Rude, extremely crowded even if you have an appointment.  I absolutely hate having to go there...


Yeah, I was almost "taken down" by some American embassy scum for being a gentleman. I went through their security check point first and Mrs. Chi was coming through behind me. At the time, the security area was quite small and I had opened the door and was politely holding it open waiting for her to come through. 

This scumbag embassy guy was coming back from lunch and saw me holding the door an went off yelling about a breach of security by having the door open...something about a terrorist attack and the Thai security guards not being able to defend the post. 

I told him to get bent and I was probably the best protection the embassy had on grounds at the moment as his Thai girlie man staff were not stopping any terrorists. An embassy worker on a power trip does not like being told to get screwed, but oh well he is lucky that is all he got.

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## dirtydog

She could easily be mistaken for a muslim though chitown, I mean she isn't even white for gawds sake  :Smile:

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## CaptainNemo

I think the mistake people often make when dealing with these people to imagine that they are having a conversation with them, and that you can ask specific questions and get specific answers. I think it's better if you treat them as robots.

You just need to present it like a simple spreadsheet, I would have thought.

(Maximum) Duration of stay: 42 days (i.e. 6 weeks)
Start date of stay: 1st of June 2011
End date of stay: 12th of July 2011
Weekly accommodation: free, supplied by relative
Proof of suffient space in accommodation for duration of specified period: estate agent's/architects plans of house layout (?!) 
Proof of sufficient vacancy in accommodation for specified period: council tax bill/electoral roll letter enclosed as proof of number of residents in accommodation
Budget for alternative accommodation (£/wk): e.g. £30/day for 42 days
Proof of medical insurance for duration of specified period: like a BUPA and Denplan policy or STA travel insurance perhaps?
Budget for food (£/day): e.g.: £10/day for 42 days
Budget for travel (£/wk): £20/wk? (includes costings for any planned sightseeing trips
Passport validity
Birth Cert.
Plane Tickets 

So a rough guess at a figure is looking like around about £2,000, excluding air fares, and assuming you get a sensible health insurance package.

I can't see them responding to this:



> how much should I pay into his account over the next 6 months


_They're_ *not* the ones applying for the visa, so they can't be expected to know how much you need, because they don't know what your plans are! How well do you eat? How lush do you like your accommodation and travel?! Think about it...
They are only front line data-entry monkeys reading off a script with no time or leeway for interpreting it for you.
As I see it, you have to show a sketch of a plan and a plausible costing up of it, and then you tot up your guesstimate amounts for the specific time period you're asking for the "permission slip" (i.e. visa) for, and then present it to them in a way that gets to the point and ticks all the boxes they have to tick on their software; and stops them asking more questions!

I think you're wasting your time with all the emotive wordage or your future plans - I don't think they care... 
I think when they just perform a risk assessment... the easier you make it for them, the easier they'll make it for you... and making it easier, to my mind, means treating it like an engineering project, where you provide a specific schedule and list of components to your trip and cost it all up on a rough calculation, doing some of the risk assessment for them.

To test out how effective the emotive sales pitch is, try adding that he will be going to sunday school and helping give palliative care to lepers on evenings and weekends.

How's that for nowt, you big southern puff? =P

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## dirtydog

Actually I have driven into the American embassy before in Bangkok, no idea what id the guy showed but we were waved through and saluted, the id check was just done through the windscreen, got to admit at the time I didn't think anything of it, can't imagine he was CIA or anything as he ripped a load of people off and done a runner, maybe an merican id card was enough in them days.

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## dirtydog

> They're the ones applying for the visa, and they are only front line data-entry monkeys reading off a script with no time or leeway for interpreting it for you.


I realise they don't give a toss whether he gets a visa or not, I also realise that probably most of them sending out these generic emails probably can't even read English so are sending the wrong ones, but, it's real simple, how much money do they want to see in his account for a 4 to 6 week holiday, he don't work, he hasn't got time to work, basically his holiday is based on how much time college will let him have off, he has no money(apart from what my girlfriend has forced him to save), he has no provable income, he has no job.

Real simple, how much money do they want me to put into his account for his holiday, the amount really doesn't matter, if he was like me when I was 18 then yes the amount would concern me as I would spend it all on a real wild time, luckily he's a bit more sensible than me and of course my mother is quite generous, or would be to him, so even a couple of grand he would come back with change, 20 years ago a good night out cost 50 to 100 quid, your on holiday thats every night you want a good night out, pretty sure it's a bit more expensive these days, also my membership cards for limelight and bootleggers have long since expired  :Sad:  would have to pay an entrance fee, although I'm much too old for clubs these days.

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## peterpan

> although I'm much too old for clubs these days.


I suspect that's not all you are much too old for    :Smile:

----------


## dirtydog

I shall add a couple more things here, he doesn't know, so therefore doesn't care about this visa and trip to the UK, this is basically to improve his English and meet some of my side of the family, quite a few of which he has never met, and in all likely hood will never want to meet again, he has never asked about England nor shown any interest in going there before as obviously I have always been in Thailand so conversations about England are extremely rare, infact I can't remember the last time the UK came up in conversation, be a good few years ago I should imagine, probably the last time some Thai policeman extorted money from me for imagined or real driving offences, "They don't do that in the UK son."

Anyway, regardless of all that, this will be a factual account of applying for a visa and what happens, I have sent them a link to this thread although I doubt they know how to click a link and any that do probably aint so good at reeding Engrish, if he does get a visa though I shall give him one of my cameras for the photo threads  :Smile:

----------


## dirtydog

> I suspect that's not all you are much too old for


Shuddup grandad, bought time you died of old age aint it  :Smile:

----------


## dirtydog

Actually I just had a brilliant idea, some of my accounts I get emails when money is put in, no idea how this stuff works, so, I shall set up a new account for my son, and set it to email these idiots each time there is a transaction, that way they got a real 6 month paper trail that they can't argue with, they get every email for every deposit and withdrawal, even stick his pocket money in there so he can withdraw 25baht each time he wants some food  :Smile:

----------


## chitown

> so he can withdraw 25baht each time he wants some food


Get that boy some proper food rather than Ramen noodles.

----------


## dirtydog

He goes to college near Bang saray, only proper food there is from that short time bar, aint going to encourage him to go there, at present he does have some morals.

----------


## CaptainNemo

> Real simple, how much money do they want me to put into his account for his holiday


.

I'd say the equivalent of £50 a day would be a *very* safe "on paper" rule of thumb amount to deposit into his account; and indicating that you have a clue about how long he's staying for by multiplying that amount by the number of days would help.

----------


## dirtydog

The last emails on the 23rd from me.




> Hi, please stop wasting mine and your time, his flight with his return ticket will be paid for, he will be staying at my mothers so there is no accommodation charges, so how much should I pay into his account over the next 6 months, I do not want to live in the UK and haven't been back for nearly 20 years, I'm pretty sure my son doesn't want to live there as he has never been there, so please, just give me a figure where you will look at his account and say that is acceptable, obviously realising this isn't his money and just money I have stuck in his account as a British citizen.


and my last email to them.




> Ok, my son's visa application is online here https://teakdoor.com/thai-visas-and-v...assy-shit.html I am a single parent, as yet unmarried asking you some real simple questions, now tell me about his visa.

----------


## dirtydog

> indicating that you have a clue about how long he's staying for


4 to 6 weeks, probably nearer 4 judging by his college, they are a bit strict.

----------


## dirtydog

This thread is a 2 edged sword so to speak, it will either be a great thread on getting a visa to the UK with some nice photos, or will be a slagging off pitch against those worthless cnuts that work there, yeah, I aint making no friends, Personally I think they are all worthless pieces of shit, 2 years to adopt your own son who you are listed as the father on the birth certificate, fuck these idiots.

----------


## Chairman Mao

> ^I am not married.


40b down the registry office. 

He can get a pommy passy then?

----------


## dirtydog

He don't want to be some aussie convict, he's a nice lad, not like you scum....

----------


## lom

Don Quixote.
He eventually realised that there's not much to gain from fighting the windmills.

----------


## hazz

> Originally Posted by hazz
> 
> It might be worth approaching the BA and asking about how getting married now would affect citizenship rights for your son;
> 
> 
> I am not a religious person, at present I can't see any financial benefits to getting married to my girlfriend, infact it may cause complications in other things, so I am not getting married, hell, I've been with her for like 16 or 17 years, I'm sure she knows exactly how many to the day she has had to put up with me, most likely she wouldn't even want to marry me  but I aint getting married for a poxy visa nor am I going to start going to church.


I'm with you there; I always said that I would never get married for the same reasons and never get into one of those, really messy when they go wrong transnational relationship thingies. Failed on both counts!  The marriage was just one of those compromises you do when you have a relationship; it was far more important for her that we got married than it was for me not to and there's been a lot of give and take from both sides to im happy enough.  But its another thing all together when its one of "Sir Humphrey Appleby's bottoms" telling you to live your life.

----------


## dirtydog

I've always believed you have to live your life as you want to, never ever let people control your life, ok I fuked up a bit, could have gone the adoption route or an Irish passport, Fake Irish passport was cheaper for my son, I blew them both out and done it the Thai way, yeah it maybe considered illegal what I done, I really don't give a fuck, aint no one going to file charges, you have to do what you have to do.

----------


## dirtydog

This probably isn't doing my sons visa application any good  :Sad:

----------


## hazz

probably not, i have to agree with the windmills comments.... sorry

----------


## lom

Everything has its time and this is not the one for fighting with the embassy when you need a service from them. You can ask them to fekk off when they want to register all Brits living in Thailand but not when you need a visa out of them.

Tell your ma to write a nice invitation letter for her grandson to come and visit her during his school holiday and under which time she guarantees to fully cover his expenses.

----------


## dirtydog

^^lets see what happens, it will all be on here.

----------


## dirtydog

> Everything has its time and this is not the one for fighting with the embassy when you need a service from them.


This is one where I think I can fight them, they fucked me for 18 years, now I stand a chance, You forget, It dont matter if I lose, he dont care if he goes there.

----------


## dirtydog

> Tell your ma to write a nice invitation letter for her grandson to come and visit her during his school holiday and under which time she guarantees to fully cover his expenses.


Nope, they want to see money for 6 months,.

----------


## nigelandjan

I think your best chance is to calm down + step back a bit  and take a different tack ,, I am sure most of us that have had dealings with this and other embassys get as frustrated. I got in a similar mukin fuddle a couple of years ago .
         How I got around it was to get personal contact ( through email ) to an individual ,, this worked wonders and the girl even phoned me in the UK to clear up a couple of things,,,,,,, If I can manage to stop chittering enuf to get out this bed tommorow I will go into the 2nd bed and rake through me password / email add book for you,, she is very helpfull

----------


## dirtydog

I aint asking for help fulll, I am asking how much to stick in his account,,,

----------


## Airportwo

Great news all round, I have to apply for a visa for my "wife' to go to uk for a visit with me, also my passport is nearly full so need another one at a rip of price!

----------


## CaptainNemo

> I aint asking for help fulll, I am asking how much to stick in his account,,,


4 weeks = 28 days x £50 a day = £1,400 (£1,000 minimum) ...includes the cost of health/travel insurance, travel, food, emergency accommodation (the largest portion).

Obviously that's more than enough, but you can transfer some of it back later on.

If you wanted the raw amount without emergency accommodation, then it's  £10-20 a day I reckon... a bare miniumum of £100 a week. ...so "a  monkey" on Cockneystani; and then a grand spare in your account to pay for emergencies.

As ultimately you are signing up to be a financial guarantor of a foreign citizen: someone they can post the bill to (and the court summons to if it dun't get paid), perhaps your mother should be the guarantor, if you are permanently resident abroad? Surely if it seems easy to nab and deport him and come after you for money in case of some issue, you'll probably have a nice smooth run.

Is this for a visitor visa rather than a student visa?

----------


## Gerbil

> or will be a slagging off pitch against those worthless cnuts that work there


Uhhmmm... the embassy dont issue visas, any more anyway... It's all been out sourced to some Indian outfit.  :Sad:

----------


## dirtydog

Fuked if I know, they said a social visa, I really have no problem with whatever amount they suggest.

----------


## dirtydog

800 views lets go with that.

----------


## DrAndy

> I don't see why you need to specify how much money he will be given or worry about money in his bank. Just read the application for family visit. He is a student going to UK to visit his grandmother with his father (both UK citizens). You (his) father will accompany him and pay all his expenses. While staying with his grandmother you and she will pay all his expenses. Apply for 6 month visa. No need for you to say anything about returning before him. Am I missing something here?


I think you are right Norton

DD, when applying for his visa, you should state that you will be supporting him and be responsible for all his living and accomodation expenses

you will then have to submit YOUR bank account details showing that YOU have sufficient funds

----------


## taffyapple

:cmn: what a load of helpful ----s working there i phoned them thurs.23dec.for an application form for the wife to renew her passport has i dont have access to download them some nice bird replied go to an internet cafe thank you end of call.

----------


## Pointer

> what a load of helpful ----s working there i phoned them thurs.23dec.for an application form for the wife to renew her passport has i dont have access to download them some nice bird replied go to an internet cafe thank you end of call.


 
I guess they expect a reasonable amount of intelligence :Smile:

----------


## oldgit

I found them to be the most unhelpful bunch also, I guess Pointer is one of them.

----------


## dirtydog

> DD, when applying for his visa, you should state that you will be supporting him and be responsible for all his living and accomodation expenses


I pretty much did that in the first email, ie asking how much they wanted to see, its real simple, how much do they want to see to issue him a visa.

----------


## dirtydog

The sad thing is a fake UK passport is cheaper and easier, something wrong with the world when that happens.

----------


## dirtydog

Fuk me, I got an uneducated Paki dealing with my sons visa, I'm fucked.

their email.

Dear, Sir/Madam



Thank you for contacting the UK Border Agency Visa Information Service in Bangkok.





We are sorry that you found our information wasted your time. However, please note that the link that you stated it was your son’s visa application was not an online application from the British Embassy, and we will not accept any other applications which are not the one that the British Embassy has provided.



Obviously, you did not understand the answer we gave that there is no set amount of funds for the financial evidence. Please understand that the reason we cannot give you the exact number of the money in your bank account, because there is no rule written for that. The acceptable set amount of money is the amount of money that covered everything in a trip which is a personal choice and a personal lifestyle (i.e. the class of a plant ticket, the kind of the accommodation, etc.)



We suggest you to estimate the cost that you would like to spend on your trip in order to know the amount of money you need in your bank account.





Yours Sincerely

----------


## dirtydog

> i.e. the class of a plant ticket


Plant ticket? are they accusing me of growing illegal drugs or something?

----------


## dirtydog

So now the 6 months of accounts aren't needed, or so we are led to believe, so why did the first emails state they needed 6 months accounts?

----------


## dirtydog

I should add he is traveling cattle class, aint no upgrades for him...

----------


## dirtydog

Hi Paki,my son wants to live in a squat dwelling with 15 other illegal immigrants and then claim dole money whilst he is there on his 4 weeks holiday, jees England is fucked aint it.

----------


## CaptainNemo

> We are sorry that you found our information wasted your time. However, please note that the link that you stated it was your sons visa application was not an online application from the British Embassy, and we will not accept any other applications which are not the one that the British Embassy has provided.


Why are you sending them external links?




> Obviously, you did not understand the answer we gave that there is no set amount of funds for the financial evidence. Please understand that the reason we cannot give you the exact number of the money in your bank account, because there is no rule written for that. The acceptable set amount of money is the amount of money that covered everything in a trip which is a personal choice and a personal lifestyle (i.e. the class of a plant ticket, the kind of the accommodation, etc.)
> 
> We suggest you to estimate the cost that you would like to spend on your trip in order to know the amount of money you need in your bank account.


...like I said...



> _They're_ *not* the ones applying for the visa, so they can't be expected to know how much you need, because they don't know what your plans are! How well do you eat? How lush do you like your accommodation and travel?! Think about it...
> They are only front line data-entry monkeys reading off a script with no time or leeway for interpreting it for you.
> As I see it, you have to show a sketch of a plan and a plausible costing up of it, and then you tot up your guesstimate amounts for the specific time period you're asking for the "permission slip" (i.e. visa) for, and then present it to them in a way that gets to the point and ticks all the boxes they have to tick on their software; and stops them asking more questions!


You need about £2,000 in your bank account, and 3-6 months of statements to show that you haven't just transferred it in there, and that you are good for a grand or two a month, and have some savings they can target (in theory).

Why don't you just tot it up?! We know the Immi service is full of immigrants, but this is not the time for the revolution, just tot up the numbers and list some plausible expenses (travel, food, accommodation, activities, admin...), what's so complicated?!

----------


## taffyapple

:cmn:  ::spin:: can any one tell me is this correct,got the forms to renew a british passport,have to send to hong kong cost 1600hkd,=£128 plus courier fees.on british web site cost £77.50 32page.

----------


## DrAndy

> Obviously, you did not understand the answer we gave that there is no set amount of funds for the financial evidence. Please understand that the reason we cannot give you the exact number of the money in your bank account, because there is no rule written for that. The acceptable set amount of money is the amount of money that covered everything in a trip which is a personal choice and a personal lifestyle (i.e. the class of a plant ticket, the kind of the accommodation, etc.)


a good response to a rude email

as the regs say exactly that, you should have been able to understand the information

after all, the website is in clear English nowadays, not like before

----------


## DrAndy

> have to tick on their software; and stops them asking more questions! You need about £2,000 in your bank account, and 3-6 months of statements to show that you haven't just transferred it in there, and that you are good for a grand or two a month, and have some savings they can target (in theory).


nope, you need what will support the lifestyle in the application form

so, if you are staying with relatives, there will be no accomodation costs, for instance

and they have never asked for previous statements from myself, it doesn't matter when the money appeared, that is irrelevant (as is most of the bureaucracy)

----------


## lom

Shit ain't it DD when you are searching out a fight and they are only ducking your swings. :Smile: 
Shadow boxing in a nutshell..

----------


## marklatham

Mountains and molehills come to mind here.
If you are his father just get a bloody british passport and save any future hassle.
There cant be any statute of limitations over taking up british nationality.

----------


## Pointer

> Hi Paki,my son wants to live in a squat dwelling with 15 other illegal immigrants and then claim dole money whilst he is there on his 4 weeks holiday, jees England is fucked aint it.


Well if you did not register your son as a British citizen after his birth that may well be what they are thinking as 150,000 Asians may well be doing that at the moment.  You mention that you did something illegal under Thai law at the times.  Does you son carry your name? You do not have to be married to register your son as a British citizen. Long term pain I am afraid.
I expect, while they have to stick to the rules, the British Embassy can be as nice or awkward as you want them to be. And even when your son reaches the UK - some guy at the Border Agency in Heathrow or whatever can still turn him back. 
Your reference to Paki shows just how out of touch you are with the UK. Or is that an insulting reference to the new Ambassador?

----------


## Seekingasylum

Sometimes Dog you really do come across as being a bit, well, thick.

I can't believe you didn't register your son for British citizenship when you had the chance. Now he's 18 you can't apply under Section 3 (1) BNA 1981, you stupid twat. However, all may not be lost provided you are indeed the named father on the birth certificate, he has lived with you and the mother since birth, you are still a family unit and, hopefully, he has junior siblings also sprung from your accursed loins. If he has such siblings then sort out their registration asap and at the same time make an application for your 18 year old to be granted equal status at the UKBA's discretion. Despite the rubbish spouted by the ignorant the Secretary of State does exercise discretion in these matters and can be pragmatic. In your case they may well treat your son favourably so as not to break up the family unit should that prospect arise. It's a slim chance but worth doing.

Needless to say you should get a decent representative to assist you since you are patently ill equipped to go it alone as evidenced by your inability to comprehend something so simple as the basis of a visa application.

Grief.....no wonder Drummond wipes the floor with you.

----------


## Pointer

> can any one tell me is this correct,got the forms to renew a british passport,have to send to hong kong cost 1600hkd,=£128 plus courier fees.on british web site cost £77.50 32page.


Check the British Embassy webside :Smile: . Not here

----------


## Pointer

> Sometimes Dog you really do come across as being a bit, well, thick.
> 
> I can't believe you didn't register your son for British citizenship when you had the chance. Now he's 18 you can't apply under Section 3 (1) BNA 1981, you stupid twat. However, all may not be lost provided you are indeed the named father on the birth certificate, he has lived with you and the mother since birth, you are still a family unit and, hopefully, he has junior siblings also sprung from your accursed loins. If he has such siblings then sort out their registration asap and at the same time make an application for your 18 year old to be granted equal status at the UKBA's discretion. Despite the rubbish spouted by the ignorant the Secretary of State does exercise discretion in these matters and can be pragmatic. In your case they may well treat your son favourably so as not to break up the family unit should that prospect arise. It's a slim chance but worth doing.
> 
> Needless to say you should get a decent representative to assist you since you are patently ill equipped to go it alone as evidenced by your inability to comprehend something so simple as the basis of a visa application.
> 
> Grief.....no wonder Drummond wipes the floor with you.


Perhaps he could use the 'American lawyer' at PAPPA who advertises here.  ::chitown::

----------


## samran

> Sometimes Dog you really do come across as being a bit, well, thick.
> 
> I can't believe you didn't register your son for British citizenship when you had the chance. Now he's 18 you can't apply under Section 3 (1) BNA 1981, you stupid twat. However, all may not be lost provided you are indeed the named father on the birth certificate, he has lived with you and the mother since birth, you are still a family unit and, hopefully, he has junior siblings also sprung from your accursed loins. If he has such siblings then sort out their registration asap and at the same time make an application for your 18 year old to be granted equal status at the UKBA's discretion. Despite the rubbish spouted by the ignorant the Secretary of State does exercise discretion in these matters and can be pragmatic. In your case they may well treat your son favourably so as not to break up the family unit should that prospect arise. It's a slim chance but worth doing.
> 
> Needless to say you should get a decent representative to assist you since you are patently ill equipped to go it alone as evidenced by your inability to comprehend something so simple as the basis of a visa application.
> 
> Grief.....no wonder Drummond wipes the floor with you.


I wanted to say the same thing, but was too polite.

Yep - OP is a bit, well no actually, really thick in this case. Child is/was eligible for a British passport but all he seems intent on doing is picking a fight with the embassy.....to his son's detriment.

----------


## oxyjohn

The British Embassy will never let it be known what the precise requirements are for the various visas as then everyone who applied would make sure they hit the mark on every requirement and then the embassy wouldn't be able to refuse anyone. Its always been a lottery applying for a visa just overwhelm them with evidence, hundreds of bank statements, copies of every page of passports, details of your mothers circumstances, photos of her home, photos of you and your son etc etc etc.

----------


## nigelandjan

^ couldnt agree with you more Oxy ,,,, I have given that advice to people for a long time now , but usually falls on deaf ears ,, people seem to think they can muddle through , but these embassy people aint here to help anyone except the UK gov to keep anyone out they can , and non EU,s are the ones they can wipe the floor with for sure

----------


## CaptainNemo

> Originally Posted by CaptainNemo
> 
> have to tick on their software; and stops them asking more questions! You need about £2,000 in your bank account, and 3-6 months of statements to show that you haven't just transferred it in there, and that you are good for a grand or two a month, and have some savings they can target (in theory).
> 
> 
> nope, you need what will support the lifestyle in the application form
> 
> so, if you are staying with relatives, there will be no accomodation costs, for instance
> 
> and they have never asked for previous statements from myself, it doesn't matter when the money appeared, that is irrelevant (as is most of the bureaucracy)


Nope... the £2,000 is based on the rough calculation I did for him further back in the thread... it's not a set figure, I just came up with a methodology for him to try. His visa app should be pretty straightforward. The only grey area for me is how many rooms/beds you might need to show you have for any given number of guests on a tourist visa (i.e. family members staying at your house, if you live there, and how much detail you might give about your sleeping arrangements!). 





> I think the mistake people often make when dealing with these people to imagine that they are having a conversation with them, and that you can ask specific questions and get specific answers. I think it's better if you treat them as robots.
> 
> You just need to present it like a simple spreadsheet, I would have thought.
> 
> (Maximum) Duration of stay: 42 days (i.e. 6 weeks)
> Start date of stay: 1st of June 2011
> End date of stay: 12th of July 2011
> Weekly accommodation: free, supplied by relative
> Proof of suffient space in accommodation for duration of specified period: estate agent's/architects plans of house layout (?!) 
> ...





> The British Embassy will never let it be known what the precise requirements are for the various visas as then everyone who applied would make sure they hit the mark on every requirement and then the embassy wouldn't be able to refuse anyone. Its always been a lottery applying for a visa just overwhelm them with evidence, hundreds of bank statements, copies of every page of passports, details of your mothers circumstances, photos of her home, photos of you and your son etc etc etc.


I'm amazed at how many people don't get it... they seem to think it's a mystic art.

It's really simple... you just state how many people for how many days, write a single sentence summarising what the trip is for; and then list a plausible breakdown of all the obvious costs involved.
Tot it up, and that's how much you need in your account... and, lets see, if you're going to be providing 3 months of bank statements, what they should show is that you didn't just transfer that money in last night, but that it's a minority proportion of your monthly income.

e.g.: £2,000 / 3 = £700-ish, so if you earn £1,000 a month, it might raise questions, under some circumstances; but if your income is £1,500 a month, and you live in a country where you only need £500 a month to live on, then it's clearly not going to raise any eyebrows.

It's not a lottery; it's a filter... 

I imagine that DrAndy was probably a lot more organised and to the point with his dealings with the visa staff. 

I've sat in that embassy building and overheard conversations and seen people who've travelled for ages to get there be a complete disorganised mess and not understand and get really upset with the staff, because they (the applicants) can't work out (or accept), that they are the ones who are the dolts because they didn't prepare properly or understand the process or the point of the process.
I guess for some people it's reminiscent of going into the DSS or the bank (depending on your TEFLing experience) and chucking a few bits of paper through and gorping at the counter staff and expecting them to "serve you" like you're a customer... but you're not a customer, you're an applicant, and their job is not to tell you the right answers, but to tell you the right questions - to ask yourself. They have to justify the decision to issue the visa to a manager, who ultimately is the bitch of a minister who gets grief from dolts who Speke There Branes about immigration and give the trollpapers a lob on about it... all protecting their rings from the orcs... why do you expect a visa official to offer up their tuppence as a blame monkey for your visa? Would you? No!




> these embassy people aint here to help anyone except the UK gov to keep anyone out they can


 :rofl: 
You are having a laugh... there have been more people let in to the UK during Labour's reign of terror than in the entire history of humans living on the British Isles... huge numbers from non-EU. Many of them should never have even got further than the interview.

----------


## taffyapple

> Originally Posted by taffyapple
> 
> 
> can any one tell me is this correct,got the forms to renew a british passport,have to send to hong kong cost 1600hkd,=£128 plus courier fees.on british web site cost £77.50 32page.
> 
> 
> Check the British Embassy webside. Not here


dont you get my point,er the b.e w.in hong kong quotes £128,in the uk the price is £77.50 why the £50 difference,is this correct or not?

----------


## hazz

> Yep - OP is a bit, well no actually, really thick in this case. Child is/was eligible for a British passport but all he seems intent on doing is picking a fight with the embassy.....to his son's detriment.


this is not strictly true. if your child was born between 1983 and 2006 and you were not married to the mother at the time of birth, then the child is not eligible for a uk passport. I assume this of one of maggie's 'back to basics' morality ocd's getting in to law.

----------


## Pointer

> Originally Posted by samran
> 
> 
> Yep - OP is a bit, well no actually, really thick in this case. Child is/was eligible for a British passport but all he seems intent on doing is picking a fight with the embassy.....to his son's detriment.
> 
> 
> this is not strictly true. if your child was born between 1983 and 2006 and you were not married to the mother at the time of birth, then the child is not eligible for a uk passport. I assume this of one of maggie's 'back to basics' morality ocd's getting in to law.


 
I think the wording or spirit of it was 'does not have the automatic right' to citizenship. 
The boy has been brought up as a Thai. The father has no intention to return to the UK, so I guess he makes a normal application as a Thai citizen but has the added advantage of family in the UK who can sponsor him. Does not seem a terribly big deal to me.

Not unless the Embassy believe he will not return to his father. But the father may have seriously pissed off the Embassy by now and may encounter some gliches perhaps.

----------


## Seekingasylum

> Originally Posted by samran
> 
> 
> Yep - OP is a bit, well no actually, really thick in this case. Child is/was eligible for a British passport but all he seems intent on doing is picking a fight with the embassy.....to his son's detriment.
> 
> 
> this is not strictly true. if your child was born between 1983 and 2006 and you were not married to the mother at the time of birth, then the child is not eligible for a uk passport. I assume this of one of maggie's 'back to basics' morality ocd's getting in to law.


I rather think Hazz you have failed to understand the law and consequently are spouting rubbish.

----------


## dirtydog

No gent, you are showing what a fool you are, I have never been married, 1 score point against me, register him as a brit at birth when your not married? Are you stoopid Gent? They wanted me to spend 2 to 3 years adopting him when I am named on the birth certificate as the father, and gent, read hazz's post and learn you fuking idiot.

Fuk we got arm chair experts on Thailand all over the UK aint we gent.

So lets go back to the beginning, the initial email was to find out how much the shit Brit embassy wants to see to give my son a visa, he has no income apart from 120baht perday pocket money, on his school holidays he does a bit of work and may earn 2,500baht per week, sometimes a bit more, he don't get many holidays from college so aint going to earn his fortune that way.

So, I can stick land in his name, money in his bank, whichever they prefer, but they want 6 months bank accounts from him, I really have no problem gifting a small plot of land worth a couple of million, but to run money thru his accounts, hell I do that for my girlfriend for her credit rating, doubt I will get away with that for the embassy.

----------


## dirtydog

> Yep - OP is a bit, well no actually, really thick in this case. Child is/was eligible for a British passport


Nope, he wasn't, your just another stupid armchair expert sitting in your cold UK home.

----------


## dirtydog

> Well if you did not register your son as a British citizen after his birth





> I can't believe you didn't register your son for British citizenship when you had the chance


2 really dumb fucking posts here who are sitting in their armchairs in England with no understanding of the law, well done lads, He is fuking 18, I wasn't married nor am I still, you couldn't register bastard offspring at that time you fuking fools, so keep your advice to idiot forums rather than here you morons

----------


## superman

> Nope, he wasn't, your just another stupid armchair expert sitting in your cold UK home.


Isn't he Australian/Thai ? If he's the same "Samran" off of Thai Visa ?

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## dirtydog

You guys must be fuking muslims, I had that about 15 years ago in Penang applying for a visa, how can you have a son when your not married they said, are you guys really as stupid as that fuker was?

I did tell him I done it the same way as married couples did it.

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## dirtydog

> But the father may have seriously pissed off the Embassy by now and may encounter some gliches perhaps.


I wouldn't be suprised at that, but lets keep talking to them.

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## nigelandjan

> You are having a laugh.


you think so ?? when did you last have dealings with the UKBA at Croydon ??

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## Seekingasylum

Oh dear Dog, you are a grump these days.
Your boy is 18, you say.
The law changed in 2005 since when you could have registered him. He would have been under 18, and in 2006, in 2007, 2008, 2009........
What's your problem? Not my fault you didn't keep up to speed with current legislation and missed an opportunity. Presumably you won't make the same mistake with his junior siblings.
Remember, you heard it here first. Sometimes fora can be useful. Had I known I would have advised you earlier.

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## Pointer

> Originally Posted by Pointer
> 
> But the father may have seriously pissed off the Embassy by now and may encounter some gliches perhaps.
> 
> 
> I wouldn't be suprised at that, but lets keep talking to them.


Yes, but they do not like talking. They will refer you to the form and the advice pages that go with the form. If u fill it in to the letter it will go thru the normal process.
In terms of cash tell him you are giving the boy a couple of thousand pocket money and show proof. Simple. Provide a letter from your mother saying she will be looking after him.

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## hazz

> Oh dear Dog, you are a grump these days.
> Your boy is 18, you say.
> The law changed in 2005 since when you could have registered him. He would have been under 18, and in 2006, in 2007, 2008, 2009........
> What's your problem? Not my fault you didn't keep up to speed with current legislation and missed an opportunity. Presumably you won't make the same mistake with his junior siblings.
> Remember, you heard it here first. Sometimes fora can be useful. Had I known I would have advised you earlier.


If you look at my earlier posts you will see a link to the border agency guidelines to the various immigration laws covering eligibility to british citizenship and at the same time you could see dogs emails explaining his circumstances. 

No I do not pretend to have any special knowledge of the law, other than having read the advice given out by the british government, in almost plain english. If you had bothered to do so you might have learned two important facts that would have prevented you from making some very elementary mistakes:

   1. The immigration law that applies to someone is the law that was in force at the moment they were born. I.E the 2006 law only applies to those born after 2006.

   2. under the 1983 immigration act. when a child is born to a non uk mother outside the uk with  a few exceptions like commonwealth countries where other laws apply; the father can only pass on his citizenship rights if he was married to the mother at the moment the child was born. The law covers all such births between 1983 and 2006. As mentioned before there are exceptions, but non relevant to dog or his son.

As for 'dogs' approach to the british embassy, its not one I would use or recommend. However I believe that the only impression that the embassy staff care about is the one that they give to the foreign office in london. I don't think that this thread will case them to be vindictive against him; but I cannot imagine them going out of their way to help him either. Clearly dog's a troublemaker; we know that and I suspect they do too. If they are vindictive; he's likely to kick up a fuss and might get the case reviewed by someone outside the embassy. It's no nice being caught out being unprofessional by people who have some control over your career; that's probably more of a concern for the embassy staff than what is written here.

The one thing I have learned from this thread is: if you are having a child, be very carful to familiarise yourself with the law before the child is born; because the circumstances of birth can have dramatic effects on the childs rights to uk citizenship and their ability to pass it on to your grand children. The same applies if you send them to school in to uk to become naturalised, where you and your partner live during this time , together with your marital status can have a big effect there too. Its a minefield

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## hazz

duplicate post

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## Seekingasylum

Obviously, you haven't read the guidance notes very well or you wouldn't be making such an arse of yourself, Hazz.

Some times one really does wonder at the intellectual ability of some posters.

Have another look and this  time take it slowly.....

Children born out of wedlock to British fathers before 1/7/2006 can register provided there is proof of paternity, the child is under 18 at the time of application, the child would have qualified if the parents were married before birth, parental agreement is forthcoming and, if over 10 years, the child is of good character.

The Dog screwed up but none of us is perfect. 

Please stop spouting gibberish as if you were the font of all knowledge. Frankly, your dubious talents are better placed elsewhere.

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## hazz

gosh, thank you for demonstrating, to me and everyone else here, your obviously superior intellect, or is it OCD, I would bow down if i could be bothered.

perhaps you could now use this superior intellect to explain this all to the border agency who also seem to be making an arse of them selves on this web page as I was relying on two passages on their website, namely:

"British citizenship may descend to one generation born abroad. So if you were born outside the United Kingdom or qualifying territory and one of your parents was a British citizen otherwise than by descent, you are a British citizen by descent. If you were born before 1 July 2006 you may not qualify if your parents were not married at the time of your birth."

and

Children born before 1 July 2006
“Parent” means:
•	the mother (if the child was born on or after 1 January 1983) – before 1983, women were not able to pass on citizenship to their children
•	the father (but only if he was married to the mother).
If the parents were not married when the child was born, but then get married, the marriage might legitimate the child’s birth. If it does, the child would become a British citizen (and would be regarded as having been one from birth) if the father was a British citizen (or settled) when the child was born. Children of a void marriage may also, in some circumstances, be treated as legitimate."

Don't forget that dog's primary interest is a visit for his son to the uk to meet some relatives; citizenship only came up as an alternative to a visitor's visa; which given his sons stated lack of interest in living in the uk would be the logical route.

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## dirtydog

> • the father (but only if he was married to the mother).


This is the pertinent bit gent, never having been the religious type I have never bothered marrying, anyone, at all, this was stated in my original email to them and posted here, as for proof of paternity, I'm sure there is a thread here somewhere where I was a bit suprised after 15 years of reporting the whole family dead they found out about it, my girlfriend has paternity due to their deaths, now at 18 it really don't matter as he is his own person.

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## Lostandfound

In my limited experience of taking 18 year olds to the UK (only twice, so far) I was told circa 50K in the bank for a couple of months would do the trick. Worked for me

Proof of reasons to return was letters from uni etc.

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## dirtydog

He probably has 50k in his account, but for them to tell me they want to see 6 months accounts signifies they want to see an active account, he or my girlfriend probably only puts money in there every 3 months, she's pretty evil and don't let him spend it  :Sad:  know what I would be doing if I was 18 and a few km from Pattaya with a few k in the bank, that would be a month long holiday in soi yodsak, well maybe not at 18, 5 or 6 girls perday etc, kids today, they just don't know how to live life to the full  :Smile:

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## Seekingasylum

Hazz, which website are you looking at?

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## dirtydog

My girlfriend does a bit of this stuff for visa's to the UK, got to admit I didn't even think of asking her even though she has got like 100 odd Thai's visas to the UK, she works for some law office doing their stuff, seems just chuck a bit of money in the account the month before, apply for a tourist visa, stick the parents name in and away you go, wonder why these cnuts want me to run money thru his account...

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## DrAndy

> dont you get my point,er the b.e w.in hong kong quotes £128,in the uk the price is £77.50 why the £50 difference,is this correct or not?


no, not correct, it would be £50.50



> duplicate post


well, the first one was good, so why not repeat it; maybe thegents could then understand his mistake

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## DrAndy

the gents always gets very arrogant when he thinks he is right



> Some times one really does wonder at the intellectual ability of some posters.





> none of us is perfect.





> Please stop spouting gibberish as if you were the font of all knowledge





> Frankly, your dubious talents are better placed elsewhere.





> Have another look and this time take it slowly.....


and then..., slightly more conciliatory



> Hazz, which website are you looking at?


he did say



> the border agency .....on their website


why on earth is thegents interested in bastard sons rights to UK citizenship?

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## taffyapple

:cmn: not correct dr.its what the exchange rate is on the day,£or bht.to hong kong dollars still no answer as to why there is such a big diff. in the price of a 10year renewal.

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## DrAndy

yeah, but you quoted the figures Taffy, not me

so  :bananaman:

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## DrAndy

> still no answer as to why there is such a big diff. in the price of a 10year renewal.


maybe if you were actually there, the price would be more equal?

otherwise, maybe they have extra work sending all the stuff off etc

maybe they like more money?

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## taffyapple

:cmn: 


> Originally Posted by taffyapple
> 
> still no answer as to why there is such a big diff. in the price of a 10year renewal.
> 
> 
> maybe if you were actually there, the price would be more equal?
> 
> otherwise, maybe they have extra work sending all the stuff off etc
> 
> maybe they like more money?


quite right dr.never that good at maths, on the first quote one place i dont want to be if you mean uk,secondly uk £77.50,thirdly you have to pay a courier service on top of 1600hk dollars.fourth dont we all.

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## Seekingasylum

> the gents always gets very arrogant when he thinks he is right
> 
> why on earth is thegents interested in bastard sons rights to UK citizenship?


My dear chap I am not wrong and my interest in this thread is purely altruistic in that I would not wish others to make the same mistake as the Dog evidently has, a mistake seemingly and eagerly propounded by the myopic and obtuse Hazz.

If you have any doubts why don't you visit the relevant section yourself?

Honestly, I should have thought someone of your calibre would have been above the silliness of the rabble who choose to remain in ignorance in preference to agreeing with one more gifted than they.

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## dirtydog

Gent, it really doesn't matter whether he gets a UK visa or not, the most important thing is he spends some time in a normal country that the main language is English, we got America, Australia or New Zealand, fuk, I would prefer to goto any of those 3 over the UK, but obviously the UK would be the cheapest for him.

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## hazz

Dd are you sure the speak English in the USA or Australia? Don't forget Canada, which has the advantage of teaching him the meaning of the phrase bl**dy cold
 :Trolling:

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## dirtydog

I just don't want him turning into an idiot Thai, I remember one time I was in Singapore on their mass transport thing, half a dozen women caught my eye as they were quite sexy, the train pulls up and they completely ignore the lines for the queue and scrambled and pushed to the front, I don't want my son turning into scum like that.

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## hazz

I know what you mean. But that's why the uk is the better option. He should go and see the place made his father, might help him understand those birtish excentrities that make most foreign types the we are barking.

And talking of the mtr, what is about Asians in general that prevents them from working out that it's stupid to try and get on a train until those getting off have done so. I've taken to assuming that morons standing On the platform blocking my way off the train are giving me implied permission to pretend they are not there and walk straight through them, knocking them flying.

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## Seekingasylum

I rather think Thamesmead has changed somewhat since the Dog was smelted in the crucible that was his Britain.

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## dirtydog

^I doubt that, it was built for ethnic minorities, full of crime and violence, although I have to admit when I was a youngster just about everybody had the front door key hanging on string behind the letterbox, so it did have its good times, shame the wogs spoilt it  :Smile:

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