Thread: Quick Jokes

^ It must be the cobblestones.

^
'No. I tried it once but my hat blew off.'

^
You don't understand... Chunks is my dog

Looks like you blew a seal.

Originally Posted by kingwilly

Looks like you blew a seal.

Sigh.

"No. Its ice cream honest."

Get with the program KW.

"Show him your Cross !"
"Get of my Bonnet you c**t "

Originally Posted by nidhogg

Originally Posted by kingwilly

Looks like you blew a seal.

Sigh.

"No. Its ice cream honest."

Get with the program KW.

oops.

Here's one.

but if you get caught fucking a goat just one time....

Blah blah blah.. on the curtains and the wife hit the roof.

Can you make me one in pink?

^

There's a bar on top of a really, really high building and it's very windy outside, so it is swaying back and forth.

A guy walks into the bar and has some drinks and is there for a few hours.

Another guy comes and sits next to him.

The first guy who has been there for a while looks at the man and says to him, "You know that there is a nice breeze outside and if you jump out it will blow you right back in."

The second guy doesn't agree and tells him to prove it. So, the first guy jumps out the window and comes soaring right back in.

The second guy asks him to do it one more time. So, the first guy jumps out and the nice breeze takes him right back into the bar.

At this time the second guy is starting to believe him and decides he needs to try this. He then jumps out and falls down to his death.

The bartender turns to the first guy and says, "You're a real asshole when you're drunk, Superman"

"Nice boobs, now where do you want the blinds?"

Originally Posted by steve down under

"Show him your Cross !"
"Get of my Bonnet you c**t "

Originally Posted by nidhogg

^

There's a bar on top of a really, really high building and it's very windy outside, so it is swaying back and forth.

A guy walks into the bar and has some drinks and is there for a few hours.

Another guy comes and sits next to him.

The first guy who has been there for a while looks at the man and says to him, "You know that there is a nice breeze outside and if you jump out it will blow you right back in."

The second guy doesn't agree and tells him to prove it. So, the first guy jumps out the window and comes soaring right back in.

The second guy asks him to do it one more time. So, the first guy jumps out and the nice breeze takes him right back into the bar.

At this time the second guy is starting to believe him and decides he needs to try this. He then jumps out and falls down to his death.

The bartender turns to the first guy and says, "You're a real asshole when you're drunk, Superman"

Well if you have to explain it

That's far too long, red him Cojo! (Said in the same cadence as Book him, Dano! )

^ tough crowd.

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so they can tell when they're really in trouble.

Did you hear about the dyslexic rock star?

He died by choking on his own Vimto.

Originally Posted by nidhogg

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so they can tell when they're really in trouble.

Fact.

Anyone with a middle name has been well and truly channelled/manipulated/screwed around with/ indoctrinated by either family. friends, society. clan, district or nation.


May peace be upon you.


Eventually.


Yor mamas and papas iz insane.

A salesman was testifying in his divorce proceedings against his wife. "Please
describe," said his attorney, "the incident that first caused you to entertain
suspicions as to your wife's fidelity."

"Well, I'm pretty much on the road all week," the man testified. "So naturally
when I am home, I'm attentive to the wife." "One Sunday morning," he continued,
"we were in the midst of some pretty heavy love-making when the old lady in the
apartment next door pounded on the wall and yelled, 'Can't you at least stop all
that racket on the weekends?'

&, just before I get my hat:

^ Ohh. Cujo is going to go medieval on your ass.......

They are jokes, and they are quick!

You're a real asshole when you're drunk, Superman
The version I heard was

Jeeezzze Gabriel, for an Arc Angel you can't half be a t*at.