I treated myself to a big fat steak & kidney pie with french fries and beans at this secret oasis I know behind an apartment I don't live in because it's 12,000 a month and I can't afford it - anyway, I'm taking the shortcut back to my soi, past the market what was being dismantled, and I hear this heartbreaking whine, and it's the dog I have seen before.

It's your average breed of soi dog (whatever that breed is) - it's got a tumor on it's neck, a maggot infested arsehole and it's legs are completely fucked and it must only be a teenager (in dog years) - it normally stands at the end of the soi like a newborn giraffe, it's bow legs looking like they were once broken - all four of them, and healed in a stupid position.

On this occasion the dog is emerging from under one of those crappy metal folding tables like what you get at pink tissue restaurants all over the country that are always painted red or blue; and as usual the dog is looking sad, unloved and confused and this time there's a small black and white cat, like Postman Pat's cat, and it's literally next to the dog looking at it condescendingly as if to say "You're fucking pathetic" and despite being a cat lover, I'm on the dogs side and I just want to see the thing out of it's misery but what can I do?

I think about calling November Rain but then realize that she's in the UK and that even if she wasn't, she'd be down in Hua Hin and it wouldn't be much use. I want to put on some latex gloves and pat the dog on the head whilst administering a painless yet lethal injection that will send it to doggy heaven but I have no such apparatus.

I look around and I see a triangular lump of concrete by a gutter and consider striking it on the head a few times but can't bring myself to do it and by this time the orange vests are being nosey so I just fuck off and on the way home I wonder if, had excreta been present (a policeman) - there would have been any chance of him doing something decent for once in his life and shooting the mutt in the head. I would have been willing to pay for the bullet.

What does one do in such a situation? ...I feel sad.