Thread: Roobarb's patch

So I asked for another photo of the transition between the kitchen and the dining area as there was definitely something amiss but the last picture was not too clear.



The builder was clearly hiding in shame - either that or he was bending over his bucket to get some more cement and lay more tiles...

Right, stop all engines. Time for a rethink.

Obviously they don't want to do it exactly the way I've asked. I have no idea why but I reckon that as I'd won my battle they were being a bit sore about it. The best thing to do is explain the problem and see what solution they suggest.

Damn, can't find the photos - More on this later..

Originally Posted by Roobarb

as I'd won my battle

Keep telling yourself that, Rhoobarb. The Thais will grind you down and get it done they're way...

Originally Posted by helge

Concept not that stupid

Thanks Helge, It may be why I had trouble getting it put into reality.

Originally Posted by Bettyboo

Originally Posted by Roobarb

as I'd won my battle

Keep telling yourself that, Rhoobarb. The Thais will grind you down and get it done they're way...

Yup, just the battle mind you. The thing is to make them think it's going to be a long drawn out war so they can win a few later. The trick is then to try and quit when you find yourself suitably ahead.

I knew that I shouldn't try anything too complicated, but everything had been going so smoothly so far. Silly I know but I just felt that something was not right with the build without a cock up along the way.

Hell, a few tiles and a day or two's labour. It's a bit of a giggle watching them try to work it out...

Originally Posted by biff

Hi Roobarb,
I must say your workers are quick, about 50 minutes to lay all those tiles..Must be Aussies.

Judging by the quality of the workmanship mate, they might as well have been Aussies...

Originally Posted by Bettyboo

I'm not saying anything... I'll wait for the cavalry.

You rang?

Originally Posted by Roobarb

On first impressions he seems to have got the concept, but there are several issues:

You asked for it by not being there.

Originally Posted by Roobarb

1) Looking at the right hand side of the doorway it looks like the tiling by the pillar is made up with offcuts.

I got hit by deja vue now.. He doesn't want to waste the offcuts and can't see anything wrong in using them

Originally Posted by Roobarb

2) Actually, the dark border bit seems to follow the pillar around to the wall which was the last thing I wanted as it accentuates the ugly pillars.

Thais have no feeling for ugliness.

Originally Posted by Roobarb

3) At first I thought it was the photo, but the tile just to the left of the bucket seems to have been cut at a very off angle. I wonder why...

see 1, this is the remain after cutting of a small triangular piece. Such a big remain can't be wasted..

Originally Posted by Roobarb

4) Of course. He's started off in the kitchen using the wonky wall as the base line.

He corrected for the wonky wall

Originally Posted by Roobarb

I knew that this would be fun.

As I said, you asked for it.
Diagonal pattern tiling is not for tilers who are used to making one middle row which is supposed to be the centre line which they then follow up with rows on each side. This tiler must have gotten very confused about where his centre is..

Hello Lom,

Yes, I was sure they were going to mess it up one way or another so giving them the chance to do it in truly spectacular style was too good an opportunity to miss. My not being there only really served to limit the amusement factor for me as I missed watching them all standing around scratching their asses as they tried to figure it out.

I know absolutely nothing about tiling. So diagonal tiling is actually more difficult than normal straight tiling then? No wonder they were resisting the idea.

I like your thought about him fixing the wonky wall by using it as the basis for his tiling. He's straightened the wall beautifully, albeit in doing so he's made the rest of the house wonky instead.

Originally Posted by nigelandjan

Oh dear ( head in hands ) why oh why do we put ourselves through this?


On a positive note, I have seen a gap in the market and a work permit opportunity.

I'm gonna become a door to door lino salesman

Good luck RB I feel for you mate sorting that lot out.

Betty I've got a rather nice slate grey offcut about 6 by 5 metres, can do you a deal before you go into tiling hell

Actually Nigel you raise a good point. Betty's tiling is yet to start. Not only that but we are getting close to the point when he is going to reveal the choice of roof tiles too.

Our little exploits are a mere prelude to the main event.

It might be too late for some of you guys in the middle of a build, but when we had some tiling done I spent the day before they started by marking out the concrete base, tile by tile, cut by cut, edge by edge, grout space by grout space with a felt tip marker and string threads.

Then it was just like following a painting by numbers board for the builders.

So, back to tiling...

The story so far: I have asked the builder to do an impossibly difficult diagonal tiling pattern. I know nothing about diagonal, or indeed any other form of tiling so have no idea that this may be a bit complicated. The builder has grudgingly had a crack at doing it but not taken into account three things:

1) He built the house with few of the walls perpendicular to the other, so using a wall as a base line is not a good idea.

2) There is a large area to be tiled, and starting at opposing ends to work towards the middle is very unlikely to be successful.

3) He knows the sort of finish I want to get to, and I know the solution that I'll be OK with but for now I'm not going to jump in to help to get there.

I'm just going to sit back and enjoy watching them scurrying around for a while. Consider it payback for them not building the place straight in the first place.

Originally Posted by taxexile

It might be too late for some of you guys in the middle of a build, but when we had some tiling done I spent the day before they started by marking out the concrete base, tile by tile, cut by cut, edge by edge, grout space by grout space with a felt tip marker and string threads.

Then it was just like following a painting by numbers board for the builders.

It actually doesn't seem a bad idea Tax. It would have worked well for doing the border in my place which would then have probably taken away much of the confusion.

I'm not so sure it would have worked for the whole floor area though as with the longest L X W floor dimensions of 15.5m x 14.5m the margin for error (especially with me doing it) would have been enormous. On saying that, from what Lom pointed out earlier, marking out a centre line from which they tile from could have been useful too.

^^ He would have sent smithers to supervise.

I pictured you more like this roobarb

The next day I received the proposed solution:



Much happiness all around...

... except that is from me.

The whole point of not having a doorway into the kitchen and having the same type of tiles throughout is to bring it all together as one room. Having a great big black line between the two was not going to do it. It would also accentuate, not hide, the wonky kitchen.

Still using offcuts too...

The clue I gave the wife to pass on the the builder was that the problem was in the kitchen, and if they tiled the rest of the ground floor house first then finished up with the kitchen, almost as if it was an an afterthought, then the focus would be on the correct area.

Off they went to think about it again.

see if you can guess these 2 posters with building threads

Betty & Nige?

heh heh

... and then another phone call.

"The builder was wondering if he could change the border a bit. How about something like this? It would save him digging up the rest of it"



No, because it then makes the pillar look even more off centre than it did before.

Look, it's not complicated. Here's how they handle going around pillars, just try to keep the dark border about 3" away from the pillars and then fill in the other bits with stone coloured tiles:

Half an hour later an other phone call:

"You mean like this?"



Good enough, let's run with it.

And so they did. The existing tiles were cut with a grinder and the unwanted bit knocked out then the border bit was done, well not properly of course, but in a way that to my eyes at least looked a bit less odd:



It had been a long, hard day, but nonetheless a battle worth fighting I think.

Tiling then continued the next day:





With only one or two more minor miscalculations therafter:

Another major step forwards was that we now had stairs.

I'd said that we just wanted something simple and basic, so that's what we got. They do the job though:



Stairs are great things to have. Look, people can use them to walk up and down on.



I wonder why they built so much of the house without thinking to install them. The amount of stuff they've had to haul up with ropes is amazing. Anyway, as is clear from this thread I'm not a builder and also not doing the hauling so I don't really care too much.

The little study area under the stairs seems to have turned out to be just about large enough for a small desk and chair, maybe a bookshelf at the end for some dusty, leather-bound tomes.



I'm glad we squeezed down the size of the two downstairs bathrooms and paid a bit extra for the builder to rebuild his wall, having this little corner has balanced the feel of the house. A window at the far end would have been nice, but it's something to go on the list for another time.

There's a bit of a gap between the top of the stairs and the ceiling of the study (you can see it in the photo in the post above). I may put in what our dearly departed and much missed friend Dr. Andy might have described as a 'Gay Arch' when we get around to getting the gypsum professionals in (as opposed to the Gyppo Butchers which is what our current builders seem to be with regards to hanging plasterboard).