C4 teach virgin to have sex

**dirtydog** · 02-12-2006, 01:48 PM

By COLIN ROBERTSON
December 01, 2006

COMMENT ON THIS STORY

A NEW Channel 4 reality show will feature a 40-year-old retired vicar being taught how to have sex . . . and enjoying his first romp.

Producers have sent him and three other virgins to an Amsterdam sex school.
The four novices will spend two months learning “the art of intimacy” in the sin city. They will be coached by a series of sex therapists who, at the end of the teaching period, will deflower the foursome.
Cameras will follow the entire process — including filming the final act.
The contestants are aged from 20 upwards.
The retired vicar — who has not yet been named — has been dubbed by producers as “the real 40-year-old virgin” — after the character played by Steve Carell in the hit movie.
The show is to be called Virgin School. An insider on the Zig Zag Productions programme said: “We will show as much as we’re allowed.”
He added: “There is nothing wrong with these guys — but they just can’t seem to get laid.
“One of them has just developed a phobia of female intimacy after he kissed a girl when he was young and got glandular fever.”
The source added that the show aimed to be educational. It is set to air in the New Year as part of a series of programmes exploring virginity.
Another show, called Losing It, looks at the different ways people use to lose their virginity including finding partners online.
C4 has already caused controversy with plans for a week of programmes on pleasuring oneself. The centrepiece will be footage of a sponsored event featuring hundreds of people publicly performing solo sex acts.

the sun

**Spin** · 02-12-2006, 01:52 PM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

C4 has already caused controversy with plans for a week of programmes on pleasuring oneself. The centrepiece will be footage of a sponsored event featuring hundreds of people publicly performing solo sex acts.

Star of the show will be the one and only Smeg

**Thetyim** · 02-12-2006, 01:54 PM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

The source added that the show aimed to be educational.

Yes, of course it is.
The fact that 40 million veiwers will switch on for a bit of titilation never occurred to them

**mrsquirrel** · 02-12-2006, 02:06 PM

DL a girls guide to sex from UK NOva

See internetl cum shots like never before.

**Bruce** · 02-12-2006, 02:30 PM

Who said TV standards had degenerated?

**I am Ginger** · 02-12-2006, 02:52 PM

I'm up for that show. Where do I sign on?

**dirtydog** · 02-12-2006, 03:41 PM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

The centrepiece will be footage of a sponsored event featuring hundreds of people publicly performing solo sex acts.

Originally Posted by I am Ginger

I'm up for that show. Where do I sign on?

Oh Dear...

**Gerbil** · 02-12-2006, 03:56 PM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

Originally Posted by dirtydog

The centrepiece will be footage of a sponsored event featuring hundreds of people publicly performing solo sex acts.

Originally Posted by I am Ginger

I'm up for that show. Where do I sign on?

Oh Dear...

I believe that being home to one of the largest collection of wankers on the Internet, ThaiVisa is handling the application process.

**Spin** · 02-12-2006, 04:32 PM

Originally Posted by deranged C4 spokesperson

“There is nothing wrong with these guys — but they just can’t seem to get laid"

Yeah right, nothing wrong with them. Cant wait to see these muppets.

Be best to send 'em down Soi Yodsak with Dirty Dog and a fist full of baht, that would sort 'em out

**klongmaster** · 02-12-2006, 05:36 PM

Originally Posted by Helicopter

Be best to send 'em down Soi Yodsak with Dirty Dog and a fist full of baht, that would sort 'em out

HC: Soi Yodsak would hardly require a fistful of money... a simple handful of purples would see them kept happy for days...

**I am Ginger** · 02-12-2006, 07:09 PM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

The centrepiece will be footage of a sponsored event featuring hundreds of people publicly performing solo sex acts.

Originally Posted by I am Ginger

I'm up for that show. Where do I sign on?

Oh Dear...

I really should be careful about which bits I quote, shouldn't I?

**Agent_Smith** · 03-12-2006, 09:13 PM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

The four novices will spend two months learning “the art of intimacy” in the sin city

Originally Posted by dirtydog

sex therapists who, at the end of the teaching period, will deflower the foursome.

2 months? Couldn't this be covered between breakfast and lunch? And talk about the worst case of blue balls when this is over.

**mad_dog** · 03-12-2006, 09:18 PM

I hate reality TV.... I watch TV to escape reality for fucks sake

**slimboyfat** · 03-12-2006, 09:18 PM

Originally Posted by I am Ginger

I really should be careful about which bits I quote, shouldn't I?

you can be as careful as you like, but any slight chink in your armour will be expoited by some bugger here.

and if there is nothing to take the piss out of you will just get misquoted instead.

its best just to join in

**slimboyfat** · 03-12-2006, 09:19 PM

Originally Posted by mad_dog

I hate reality TV.... I watch TV to escape reality for fucks sake

i thought that was why you use drugs

**kingwilly** · 03-12-2006, 09:21 PM

Originally Posted by dirtydog
The centrepiece will be footage of a sponsored event featuring hundreds of people publicly performing solo sex acts.

Quote:
Originally Posted by I am Ginger
I'm up for that show. Where do I sign on?

Originally Posted by slimboyfat

its best just to join in

Oh Dear....

**slimboyfat** · 03-12-2006, 09:25 PM

bloody snipers everywhere here

**dirtydog** · 03-12-2006, 10:22 PM

Originally Posted by kingwillyhggtb

Originally Posted by dirtydog
The centrepiece will be footage of a sponsored event featuring hundreds of people publicly performing solo sex acts.

Quote:
Originally Posted by I am Ginger
I'm up for that show. Where do I sign on?

Originally Posted by slimboyfat

its best just to join in

I fancy a bit of that aswell....

Jees cant you all get a room

**mad_dog** · 03-12-2006, 10:33 PM

Originally Posted by slimboyfat

Originally Posted by mad_dog

I hate reality TV.... I watch TV to escape reality for fucks sake

i thought that was why you use drugs

Only occasionally ... I did have a mad mad sesh on Friday with a sub editor of a famous Bangkok newspaper. Booze, opium and yaba... the magic equation. That's it till new years. once every month or two these things need to be done to give life some clarity...

**LesBonsTemps** · 05-12-2006, 04:37 AM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

By COLIN ROBERTSON
December 01, 2006

“There is nothing wrong with these guys — but they just can’t seem to get laid.

“One of them has just developed a phobia of female intimacy after he kissed a girl when he was young and got glandular fever.”

Oh, really?!

**kingwilly** · 05-12-2006, 06:57 AM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

Originally Posted by kingwillyhggtb

Originally Posted by dirtydog
The centrepiece will be footage of a sponsored event featuring hundreds of people publicly performing solo sex acts.

Quote:
Originally Posted by I am Ginger
I'm up for that show. Where do I sign on?

Originally Posted by slimboyfat

its best just to join in

I fancy a bit of that aswell....

Jees cant you all get a room, so i can watch while madly tugging my pud

i knews youse waz a closet poove DD!

**I am Ginger** · 06-12-2006, 06:54 PM

Originally Posted by mad_dog

I hate reality TV.... I watch TV to escape reality for fucks sake

I couldn't agree with you more. Give me a good ol' scripted show over a reality one any day.

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