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  1. #1
    たのむよ。
    The Gentleman Scamp's Avatar
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    How do I stop people stealing this great idea?

    It came to me in a dream and it was in a big yellow can which had DE-SEPPO written down the side in blue letters, alas the formula I have forgotten but it was a mixture of natural and chemical and was a colourless spray that smelled acrid but not unpleasant.

    Anyway, if somebody you know is like talking like a Merkin or being over emotional or over-using words such as 'awesome', then all you had to do was give them a quick spray and all of a sudden they would become more self aware, be able to spell properly and appreciate Radiohead.

    It is effective for up to six hours or four hours if sprayed on a bona fide US citizen. Hold the can no more than a foot away from your target and spray over the head/face/shoulders.

    I hope this thread is not insulting to Merkins, let's not forget that my hero is a Seppo - the great George Carlin so if this thread offends you, spray yourself with DE-SEPPO and learn to laugh at yourselves. Perhaps you could invent a spray for us English that when applied...
    "I'm an outsider by choice, but not truly. It's the unpleasantness of the system that keeps me out. I'd rather be in, in a good system. That's where my discontent comes from: being forced to choose to stay outside.
    My advice: Just keep movin' straight ahead. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place."

    George Carlin

  2. #2
    Sprayed On Member
    The Fresh Prince's Avatar
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    Awesome idea dude.

  3. #3
    On a walkabout
    Loy Toy's Avatar
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    Radiohead..........'awesome'.

    Oh fcuk...................spray me quick!

  4. #4
    Sprayed On Member
    The Fresh Prince's Avatar
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    Actually I'm jealous that I'm stuck here at work and you can just stay home and smoke that shit all day.

    My advice is keep toking until you pass out and concentrate on getting back into the same dream. Then find the formula and write it down before you wake up.

  5. #5
    たのむよ。
    The Gentleman Scamp's Avatar
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    I don't toke TFP, I smoke normal ciggies - I don't need that shit to appreciate a really good documentary on Glastonbury.

  6. #6
    Days Work Done! Norton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp
    alas the formula I have forgotten
    Doesn't matter! The placebo effect will come into play.

    Just fill the can with scented water and launch a huge marketing campaign. Always works for the seppos.

  7. #7
    ทำไมคุณแปลนี้
    filch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Norton View Post
    Doesn't matter! The placebo effect will come into play.

    Just fill the can with scented water and launch a huge marketing campaign. Always works for the seppos.

  8. #8
    Sprayed On Member
    The Fresh Prince's Avatar
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    Thinking about it, I do say the word 'awesome' a bit too often. This is probably down to the fact that out of my honky friends, most of them are merkins. I would like to make a concious effort to change and just in case TGS doesn't invent DE-SEPPO I need an alternative word.

    What is the alternative word in England? and I don't want to use 'brilliant'.

  9. #9
    In transit to Valhalla

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp View Post
    It came to me in a dream and it was in a big yellow can which had DE-SEPPO written down the side in blue letters, alas the formula I have forgotten but it was a mixture of natural and chemical and was a colourless spray that smelled acrid but not unpleasant.

    Anyway, if somebody you know is like talking like a Merkin or being over emotional or over-using words such as 'awesome', then all you had to do was give them a quick spray and all of a sudden they would become more self aware, be able to spell properly and appreciate Radiohead.

    It is effective for up to six hours or four hours if sprayed on a bona fide US citizen. Hold the can no more than a foot away from your target and spray over the head/face/shoulders.

    I hope this thread is not insulting to Merkins, let's not forget that my hero is a Seppo - the great George Carlin so if this thread offends you, spray yourself with DE-SEPPO and learn to laugh at yourselves. Perhaps you could invent a spray for us English that when applied...

    No need invented already- pepper spray make you loose your fake posh upper-class accents and squeal in your native lingo, Yorkshire,Liverpool, Welsh ect.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Fresh Prince View Post
    Thinking about it, I do say the word 'awesome' a bit too often. This is probably down to the fact that out of my honky friends, most of them are merkins. I would like to make a concious effort to change and just in case TGS doesn't invent DE-SEPPO I need an alternative word.

    What is the alternative word in England? and I don't want to use 'brilliant'.
    Fvck me! All this time, I wasn't even paying attention.....are you septic Princey?

  11. #11
    たのむよ。
    The Gentleman Scamp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Norton View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp
    alas the formula I have forgotten
    Doesn't matter! The placebo effect will come into play.

    Just fill the can with scented water and launch a huge marketing campaign. Always works for the seppos.


    Be pelted with greens.

    Quote Originally Posted by TFP
    Thinking about it, I do say the word 'awesome' a bit too often. This is probably down to the fact that out of my honky friends, most of them are merkins. I would like to make a concious effort to change and just in case TGS doesn't invent DE-SEPPO I need an alternative word.

    What is the alternative word in England? and I don't want to use 'brilliant'.
    First-rate?

  12. #12
    ทำไมคุณแปลนี้
    filch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Fresh Prince View Post
    Thinking about it, I do say the word 'awesome' a bit too often. This is probably down to the fact that out of my honky friends, most of them are merkins. I would like to make a concious effort to change and just in case TGS doesn't invent DE-SEPPO I need an alternative word.

    What is the alternative word in England? and I don't want to use 'brilliant'.
    "Nice"



    But whatever word you come up with FP, I will ensure it's enforced. Whenever I am with you and I hear you say awesome, a swift and sharp back hander to remind you. Either that or you have to give me a free pint.

    I'll opt for the latter!

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rural Surin
    Fvck me! All this time, I wasn't even paying attention.....are you septic Princey?
    Don't be daft, I'm a Brit. I've just got a lot of seppo mates. And in their defence, they're not your average yanks, they're all good people.

  14. #14
    ทำไมคุณแปลนี้
    filch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Fresh Prince
    they're not your average yanks, they're all good people.
    I'll second that, as far as Seppo's go, they're not a bad bunch. Friends of mine too.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by filch View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by The Fresh Prince
    they're not your average yanks, they're all good people.
    I'll second that, as far as Seppo's go, they're not a bad bunch. Friends of mine too.
    Sure. Some are right people....

  16. #16
    Rhubarb, rhubarb, rhubarb
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Fresh Prince View Post
    Thinking about it, I do say the word 'awesome' a bit too often. This is probably down to the fact that out of my honky friends, most of them are merkins. I would like to make a concious effort to change and just in case TGS doesn't invent DE-SEPPO I need an alternative word.

    What is the alternative word in England? and I don't want to use 'brilliant'.
    Top-hole.
    Spiffing.
    First-class.
    Wizard.
    Excellent.
    Brill.
    Not bad (classic British under-statement).

  17. #17
    Sprayed On Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by filch
    But whatever word you come up with FP, I will ensure it's enforced. Whenever I am with you and I hear you say awesome, a swift and sharp back hander to remind you.

    Does this count for you as well as the only other Brit in our group? You say it quite a lot too!

  18. #18
    Sprayed On Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by filch
    "Nice"
    One of the crapest words ever invented. It describes nothingness.



    Quote Originally Posted by Sir Burr
    Top-hole. Spiffing. First-class. Wizard. Excellent. Brill. Not bad (classic British under-statement).
    I can't use any of them.



    Quote Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp
    First-rate
    I might try this for a laugh and see how it goes.

  19. #19
    ทำไมคุณแปลนี้
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    Actually I do say 'nice', but not like the jazz fella'. I very rarely use awesome.

    So yeah, it's a deal.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Fresh Prince
    I might try this for a laugh and see how it goes.
    You will get laughed at!

  20. #20
    I am in Jail
    Lily's Avatar
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    'Jolly good'?

    or the Australian,

    'Crikey'! or 'Holy shit'!

  21. #21
    ทำไมคุณแปลนี้
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    An old Manc classic 'nice one'!

  22. #22
    Dislocated Member

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    Is one of the ingredients; Spirit of Bill Hicks? I think that'd work.

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by filch
    I very rarely use awesome.
    Sorry but you do say it quite a lot. You sound like a Manky Merkin!

  24. #24
    Hello World
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    I have lots of American heroes, like the man in my AV. I think this thread will be taken in fine fettle by the merkins as Tex isnt around to get all uber nationalistic about a bit of fun.

    This product has potential DE-SEPPO,

    DE-AUSSIE could stop the Aussies making everything they say sound like a question?
    DE-KIWI could just be some form of sheep repellent.

    Plenty of room for expansion.
    The Geek Shall Inherit The Earth

  25. #25
    ทำไมคุณแปลนี้
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Fresh Prince
    Sorry but you do say it quite a lot. You sound like a Manky Merkin!
    Proof?

    I am going to make a concious effort when we next see each other to count how many times you say awesome compared to me

    Manky Merkin....is that a dirty American?

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