I got stopped on my bike by the cops in phuket. The guy kept saying 'diving lysen, plees, diving lysen'. I didn't have my PADI card on me and was amazed at how this geezer could possibly know that I had booked a scuba diving trip the next day. Once we solved the language problem and I showed him my driving license I was surprised to be let on my way without even being shaken down for a few hundred baht for good measure.

Yesterday I got clipped $72 for parking in a fokking doctor's carspace - the boys in brown might be a pain in the arse but at least their charges are negotiable.