Thread: Missing Shit

I do not do laundry.

I just had to conduct this experiment myself because the maid claimed a Pee was stealing my socks after I shouted at her for losing my socks.

What fucking ghost has a sock fetish?

I threw away an odd sock today. I was wearing both last week. I went through the entire basket and bedroom floor, it's gone. It's a mystery.

Expel the notion that socks should be identical.
Ploblem solved.

I intend to set up a web cam to monitor my laundry basket (I will stream it live).

I'm sure technology can solve this mystery.

A nobel prize awaits.....

I solved the problem...murdered the washing machine and threatened the maid she would go the same way if she did not hand wash my socks...

Maid hates the cable round her neck but I keep telling her not to worry...just as long as she doesn't drop below 1000 watts...

Head sweat bands................I think she sells them on E-Bay or sends them to Smeg.

Socks are amphibious.
When put into water they will mate, and like certain spider species, after mating the female sock will devour its mate.

Here is an American female sock eating a baby by mistake.

Originally Posted by barbaro

Anyway, this could be a sign of dementia

Could be.... she is 22. Probably time to trade her in for a younger model without memory loss.

Originally Posted by barbaro

Everything si in the same place.

So do I. But then I have a wife who decides the furniture needs to be re-arranged in the middle of the night.

Two weeks ago I found my whole office had been moved to a different room. I thought I'd woken up in the wrong house (again. )

where the fvck did that go.and youre worried about your socks

Originally Posted by Gerbil

Who is the fucking sock goblin that eats socks? __________________

Further proof of the existence of the sock ghost.

Never wash socks by hand. FACT.

Socks go to that same space time continuum that ballpoint pens go.

Originally Posted by barbaro

Originally Posted by Gerbil

Socks.

Where the fuck do they go?

1) Take x pairs of socks (where x is any number greater than 1).
2) Wash and dry them (with some other laundry).
3) Count the socks.
4) Match them up.
5) What the fuck?

Who is the fucking sock goblin that eats socks?

Do you have a dog. A thai dog used to steal my socks in the village.

I used to wonder where my socks and other laundry items disappeared to.. I once got around to doing a bit of gardening and found a large stash of the missing items that had been buried there by my dog, obviously a bit bored during the daytime.

I waste about 3mins every morning trying to pair up socks. That's nearly 18 hours a year. They are all black but there are different shape combinations.

Originally Posted by Koojo

Socks go to that same space time continuum that ballpoint pens go.

Fucking too right. I brought 5 pens with me for this trip to Vietnam, just so that I could fill in my arrival card when I get back to Thailand. I'm sat in the airport now in HoChi Minh and I've got one left.

I thought socks only existed on AF?

you have a problem with socks, everytime i return home i find most of my tshirts and shorts have gone missing the old ones i like, i am told there to old so i give them to Brother, the brothers better dressed than me.

Originally Posted by withnallstoke

Expel the notion that socks should be identical.
Ploblem solved.

Identical socks work for me, I bought 30 pairs of proper woolen work (I wear steel cap boots 60hrs per week) socks out from OZ last year. No issue with odd socks although I think Iam down to 20 pairs now.

A while ago in some TV magazine there was an expert on washing machines taking questions.

Invariably the question came up if washing machines do eat socks.

His answer was: No, washing machines don't eat socks. They disappear into a parallel dimension.

I don't wear socks.

Problem solved.

Originally Posted by withnallstoke

Expel the notion that socks should be identical.
Ploblem solved.

I only buy black socks.
Problem avoided.

Originally Posted by bobo746

where the fvck did that go.and youre worried about your socks

There is picking your nose ,, and there is being just plain damm greedy