I got chatted to by this voluptuous bird with an impressive bust on the BTS the other night asking me where The Marriot hotel was and where to get off. I said Asoke and asked her where she was from, guessing it was Moldova, Slovakia, Romania or something and she only said Egypt didn't she. She didn't look Egyptian, she didn't have a beard or turban or anything. I smiled widely and shook her hand saying, "Fair play to you people, you go get your freedom sweetheart" which made her smile back, though it may have been an awkward smile of politeness I'm not sure - all I know is that she stood up after that revealing her curvy bulbous bottom as we pulled into Asoke and I said "Nice to meet you". She turned around and smiled as she extended the handle on her mini suitcase and then she exited the train. I have to admit I half expected her to do that funny walk like in the video for the Bangles song but she walked like anybody else, and it was this distracting thought that was to my detriment, for then she was gone and we were moving towards Phrom Phong, hey doesn't the name of that station remind you of a brass band or a band stand, trombones and stuff?? - it always does me, don't know why - anyway.

After that of course it was too late I realized what an idiot I had been forgetting to ask her what her name was, get her number or email or - invite myself back to her room. Of course!! I'm sure it would have been well easy now that Egypt is having a revolution. All the birds must be flinging off their burkhas and looking for casual sex with anyone, especially foreigners!

That night I dreamed about her, walking together on the beach in Hat Yai and going fishing in a little boat and meeting her parents and stuff and her dad really getting on well with me and refilling my glass with beer but me politely saying that I don't drink or smoke or do Xanax anymore. With this in my head the next day, I made my way to The Marriot, which is actually Ploen Chit station not Asoke, and I was hungry so I went to McDonalds first (yeah that's how starving I was) and the one edible thing they have they stop doing at 11:00 which is a sausage egg McMuffin, so I caused a real scene in there which I'm not proud of so I won't go into that.

After this I went to The Marriot and spoke to the woman manager who is in charge of the entire ground floor I think, and I told her my story in full detail, including the dream and she asked if the woman had a name and I said probably, but I didn't get it and she explained that at any one time there are about 40 EgyptAir staff staying at The Marriot so I said I could write a note anyway and she could just give it to one of the cabin crew and maybe they will pass it around to their friends until it got to the special one.

So, I was escorted to the concierge, is that how you spell it? ..Wasn't a squiggly red line so must be right. We got there and I felt like Hugh Grant in a romantic movie I did, so I started writing and explained that I was the nice guy on the BTS and that I meant to say Ploen Chit not Asoke and would she like to have lunch next time she's in town? By the way, she had mentioned that she was in town for a couple of days, so if she's in the flight attendant game she will no doubt come back soon for a couple of days and maybe I can stay with her in her hotel room.

The manager woman took my note and she was gone, she had been very nice and friendly. Then I went back to my business.

To be concluded...