Thai governments plans to cap foreign teacher salaries

[DJ Pat]

The Thai Department of education today imposed a cap on salaries earned by foreign teachers working teaching english in Thailand.
After the recent attempt to publicise english as a second language in Thailand, which was deemed impossible by experts, a decision was made to impose limits on the ability of foreign english teachers.

''We want to keep Thailand for the Thais, we don't need a second language'' Somchai Wattana, education minister said yesterday.
''Our non-colonisation is testament to our pride, and the less intelligent and lower paid foreign english teachers are, the less chance of them being able to learn english''

Boonrut Charantuit, former education ambassador, was upbeat about the situation, saying that ''To be honest, most teachers working in Thailand are two-bit sex tourists with fake credentials, and, as 90% of our population are as thick as pigshit anyway this will ensure that only the highly educated higher classes will be able to converse in english''

A spokesman for Text & Walk, a popular training centre for potential 'ajarns' entering the industry, was furious, stating that ''What kind of aspirations can we offer our students at the end of their course? I know our course is a rip off but that's not the point here, the issue is with the salary limits. 280 Baht an hour is simply not enough to live on, how the hell could they prop up a go-go bar with such paltry wages? it's a travesty of a mockery of two mockerys of a sham, I demand a re-think''

The news was met with contempt by property magnate, Zak Roomfinder, head of popular website Mr. Roomfinder, who claimed ''My prices are too high anyway but what kind of traffic will I get through my site now? How can salaries get any lower? Our apartments start at 25,000 Baht a month, which is already low enough, any lower and I may as well beg for cash on the streets''


These new legislations provide huge oppourtunities for Filipino teachers arriving in Thailand

The legislation is unlikely to make any differences to the performance of Thailands most popular foreign teaching website, although fears that more pigeon-englished Filipinos would enter the market look to be founded, as rumours of another two boatloads of Filipino teachers were intercepted at Laem Chebang port being smuggled in two metal containers.


More Filipino teachers arriving in Thailand last night

Thai officials claim no knowledge of such an incident, it was said last night.
Filipino teaching association head, Manuel Toquero, was delighted by the news,
''We have good motivationism in our intentional ideas of being teaching gurus in schooling here in the Thailand, more power to Thai governments for giving this oppourtunity to expand wings of educationalism to the people of fine nation of Siam..sorry Thailand''

[kingwilly]

yawn.

[DJ Pat]

You know you love my threads.

[chitown]

The good news is that they are probably not screwing their ugly cuz-ins.

[DJ Pat]

Who isn't?

[sabang]

I'd be surprised if the PAD hasn't already suggested it to Slorc.

[DJ Pat]

It'll be on the agenda, I'm sure, and quite soon.

[DrAndy]

There was talk of the company "Rosetta Stone" coming to Thailand, but intelligent Thai officials realised that the Rosetta stone was an ancient tablet with a dual language inscription.

The company is essentially a language learning system based on talking and repeating, so was deemed to be trading under false credentials

[good2bhappy]

nice one Pat

[keda]

Started off plausible enough, but I sussed it out after googling Ajarn Cruises.

[DJ Pat]

Started off plausible enough, but I sussed it out after googling Ajarn Cruises.

There's a big market for this kind of thing, you'll be surprised.

[EssEffBee]

God one DJ

Truthfully though, there IS an official limit for the salary of foreigner teachers who work in government establishments. I think it's about 20 000 Baht a month (not sure).
Most schools etc must seek permission from the ministry of finance before the foreign teacher's salary can be increased.

[Bettyboo]

DJ Pat has correctly captured the thinking of many different cogs in the machine. It's also better written and more plausable than most Nation pieces.