In a crueller, funnier world...

[benbaaa]

...Steve Irwin would get eaten by a huge crocodile and we'd all be able to watch it on video on the news, clapping and cheering,

[kingwilly]

oi leave steve alone - him a good fella!

[baldrick]

I used to think steve was a loudmouth wanker - but over time I have come to respect him , he is a no bullshit boy and does what he says he will do.

[Little Chuchok]

I used to think steve was a loudmouth wanker - but over time I have come to respect him , he is a no bullshit boy and does what he says he will do.

I met the prick years ago.Way before he was famous.Nice enough guy and not as nearly as 'troppo' as he is on TV.Still, he likes crocs way too much.

[NickA]

[Sir Burr]

Used to like him, but, when he took his six month old baby with him into the croc pen "to get her used to crocs", I decided that he was indeed a wanker.

[mrsquirrel]

It would be ok to laugh at the blind people singing at the market being led around by other blind people.

Hang on I do laugh at them..... I think that is why I have elbow shaped bruises down my side from the missus.

[poolcleaner]

...Steve Irwin would get eaten by a huge crocodile and we'd all be able to watch it on video on the news, clapping and cheering,

Yay!!

I think he's one of the biggest cnuts going around pretending to be the quintessential Aussie.
All brawn, no brain, with a childish outlook on life that has a refreshing charm when one looks at life in Germany, England and of course the US.

Real life he's just another scamming cnut!

[kingwilly]

All brawn, no brain, with a childish outlook on life that has a refreshing charm when one looks at life in Germany, England and of course the US.

Real life he's just another scamming cnut!

like most otter aussies then......

[MeMock]

he's allright.

I catch crocodiles sometimes to show off to southern family.

But they are never any bigger then 3 feet!!! I'm a wuss.

[danbo]

He is a far too, 'ooh look at me everyone' for my liking. Very much 'This is the most dangerous teddy-bear on the planet; one swipe with its fluffy paws could rip my head of.....Here I go, I'm going to cuddle the teddy bear'.....

I guess that comparing David Attenborough with Steve Irwin tells you all you need to know about our two great nations.

[DrAndy]

yes, Steve wears better shorts

[SheriffAndy]

He gon' get his mm-hmm. Gon' happen sooner or later. See heya nah, gaters is ornery. Now Bobby Bouchee's Momma say d'at cause gaters got so many teeth and no toothbrush to brush'em with. True enough. That must be frustrating. Compound that with the fact that they've got no thumbs to hold a toothbrush properly with and even if they did they have wee little small arms, and you've got a recipe for an unhappy reptile.

Now I know professer Sanders said they have an enlarged Medusa Oblongata, but gaters'ed be mean as Hell even if they had Doris Day's brain.

[endure]

yes, Steve wears better shorts

Not any more, he doesn't.

[benbaaa]

Well, so far only Mrs Q has got the point of this thread...




Yes, it's one of those 'add your own idea' ones, not a 'blather on about Steve Irwin' one. NickA's contibution excepted, for being funny.

[baldrick]

Well, so far only Mrs Q has got the point of this thread...




Yes, it's one of those 'add your own idea' ones, not a 'blather on about Steve Irwin' one. NickA's contibution excepted, for being funny.

well benny - reply to your own thread if you do not like our replies - CFzero

[SheriffAndy]

Yes, it's one of those 'add your own idea' ones, not a 'blather on about Steve Irwin' one. NickA's contibution excepted, for being funny.

No Sir, I don't want to lather up with Steve Irwin no more'n yer next man. I mean sure, he's got them thar silky blond hairs'n'all, and yes he does have a purty mouth and does them khaki's proud, but no - latherin' up ain't crossed my mind an' anyone who says it has is just a plain ol' pinko, liberal, commie fag.

What has been ruminatin' and perkilatin' in my mind is this whole issue of gaters and orneryness. If this 'Medula De La Hoya' thing perfesser Sanders alludes to is, in fact, the cause then my idea here may not be worth the band width it's takin' up, but hear me out.

If Mamma Bouchee's idea is right, and they's ornery on account of havin' a whole stack of unbrushable teath, then maybe we could create a special gater tooth cleanin' device, or even set up dental clinics. I imagine they might be carryin' some leftover hostilities in'em for a while, what with the fact that they ain't real fond of evolvin' -- and I ain't real fond o' Evolution enether - but maybe it's the start of man an' gater livin t'gether in hominy.

[Eliminator]

He does some crazy shit sometimes like the show where he let the Fierce snake stick it's tongue to his face. That was just stupid, not because there's no antivenom,but because it gives kids the wrong idea about snakes. Do agree with BB that people would clap to see something happen to him. The fore mentioned show and many other ones would be the cause of it.

[danbo]

'Bout time there was a thread dedicated to Steve Irwin. What A git. Nice one ben.

[kingwilly]

'Bout time there was a thread dedicated to Steve Irwin. What A git. Nice one ben.

yeah - have a greenie for a great thread - might even nominate it for TOTW

[Wally Dorian Raffles]

I like the bit when he shoves his thumb up the arse of the animals he catches, just to really piss them orf....

[danbo]

I like the bit when he shoves his thumb up the arse of the animals he catches, just to really piss them orf....

benbaaa?

[benbaaa]

In a crueller, funnier world, it turns out that Smeg is in fact DJ Pat, that neither of them are DJs or famous jet-setting international bankers, but in fact they are one, and the bastard offspring of a fat, sweaty TEFLer, previously a lorry-driver from Bournemouth, with bad shoes and an unironed shirt, trying but failing to make a go of it in a foreign land, and a tattooed, pierced, blond-dyed farm girl from Isaan who made it all the way to Nana in search of a fortune, got knocked up by "dad", wound up delivering little Smeggy in the local hospital in Bournemouth... etc, etc, thus explaining our hero's current love-hate obsession with Thailand, hookers and all things Thai/TEFL-related in a scary Norman Bates kind of way...

That's in a crueller, funnier world, you understand, not in this world.

Oh, and before you all start, this is not a Smeg bashing thread either. There are plenty of those. So please carry on with the Steve Irwin anecdotes.

[mrsquirrel]

In a crueller funnier world I would be a genetic scientist and make people with massive dumbo ears so I could follow them around and ridicule them for having massive ears.

[DrAndy]

In a crueller, funnier world, there would be no traffic lights