Wifes Complaints!

[Missismiggins]

I get sick to the eye teeth of my wife complaining about sand !

If I put on a pair of flip flops to go and poison the grass, poison the insects or water anything...outside, I get this sanctimonious shit about "Take care of your feet" "whatch your hands for poison", "Be careful of those snakes my HERO!", and "Watch out for those ants you stud!"

So I put on a pair of lace up boots, some cheap shit from Carrefoure, taking care of myself!

But fuck me! I forget to take them off or I need to run upstairs quickly to catch the phone...forgetting to take off the "recommended boots"

Boy, the story changes dramatically!

"Who has put all this sand here?"....You would have thought I had transported Karon fucking beach here...a few grains...but they hate it...try and leave a few grains in the bed...they become sleepless and irrational...

In the end I told her to go and shut up and imagine she was on a beach in Phuket...funny how Thais actually hate the sea the beach the sun, in fact everything they have!

I am just buying time a little, in five or ten minutes everyone will be asleep, then I can switch off that CRAP TV THAI, or some fucking retard cartoon..HALO or whatever, and actually watch a decent movie...

The car is in for a repair tomorrow....so expect some posts about shoddy workmanship and slack quality control!

[buriramboy]

You sound a bit under the thumb and pussy whipped to me.

[withnallstoke]

Don't fret miggins. Chill your boots untill this weekends blessing.

[mrsquirrel]

You are going troppo miggins.

Time for a break before you break yourself

[ItsRobsLife]

When is the divorce Miggins?

[tsicar]

When is the divorce Miggins?

i once found a divorce list my first ex wife had "accidentally" left lying around.

the first two complaints, on the first of FOUR typed a4 pages read:

1) farts loudly in bed (loy-toy suffers from this malady too, as i gathered from the sister thread)

2) thinks it is fun to fart loudly in a crowded lift, then turns and stares at some old guy, holding his nose and shaking his head so as to let the other sufferers think it was the old guy that farted!



i think that if the only problem she had was sand in the bed, we would still be married, poor girl!!

[Fondles]

Cant you get your child to tell her to go fuck herself ??

[Travelmate]

Do what all men do. Ignore the wife!

[Thetyim]

i once found a divorce list my first ex wife had "accidentally" left lying around.

I will never forget my ex's list that was read out in court
It included "Farting loudly in a tea-shop in Arundel, Sussex"

[Cujo]

Cant you get your child to tell her to go fuck herself ??

You owe me a new keyboard.

[Panda]

I rather like the Thai custom of taking your shoes off at the front door.
Walking dog shit, sand or mud through the house aint the smartest thing to do when you could just as easily avoid the labour of cleaning it up by simply taking off your shoes at the front door.

And who needs to "run upstairs" in dirty boots to answer the phone anyway? Get an answering machine or a walk around phone if you feel compelled to run every time the phone rings.

As most here would be aware, in traditional Thai culture they often sit on the floor, eat on the floor and sometimes sleep on the floor. Plus, its the place where babies crawl about. So clean floor is a must in Thai culture, and not a bad idea that farangs could take on either.

Get your farken boots off Miggens before you walk inside and stop your whinging.

[Nawty]

yeah...who wears the boots in your family.....poooosssssyyyyyy

Go and bobsled your arse around in the sand and then get the missus to stick her tongue in ya bung hole......that should fire up the sand debate.

[StrontiumDog]

yeah...who wears the boots in your family.....poooosssssyyyyyy

Go and bobsled your arse around in the sand and then get the missus to stick her tongue in ya bung hole......that should fire up the sand debate.

You're definitely getting into this whole tongue in the ass thing.

[StrontiumDog]

You sound a bit under the thumb and pussy whipped to me.

Yeah, but he has his online friends here to support him through this difficult period.

We are here for you Miggs. Hang in there mate.

I find shooting things helps me to get back in touch with my masculinity.

[Nawty]

yeah...who wears the boots in your family.....poooosssssyyyyyy

Go and bobsled your arse around in the sand and then get the missus to stick her tongue in ya bung hole......that should fire up the sand debate.

You're definitely getting into this whole tongue in the ass thing.

It is a nice experience....amazing how far you can actually get your tongue in there.

[Missismiggins]

i once found a divorce list my first ex wife had "accidentally" left lying around.

I will never forget my ex's list that was read out in court
It included "Farting loudly in a tea-shop in Arundel, Sussex"

You have to be joking??? Did you really get cited for that?

I was simply cited for unreasonable behaviour...lying on the front room floor in a comatose position after imbibing myself with copious ammounts of alcohol.

I didn't contest it, I didn't want to drag her "good name" through the courts as to how she drove me to this state!

[Missismiggins]

yeah...who wears the boots in your family.....poooosssssyyyyyy

Go and bobsled your arse around in the sand and then get the missus to stick her tongue in ya bung hole......that should fire up the sand debate.

Nothing to do with "Bung Holes" I put on a pair of boots to prevent snake bites, we have shitloads of these buggers, and the first place they will go for is your ankles.

A pair of stinking old boots from Carrefoure makes me feel a bit safer than a pair of flip flops! Believe me, when you climb under a lam yai tree on top of all those dead leaves and some shiny green or black fucker starts wriggling around underneath your feet, I know what I would rather be wearing! There are at least 3 dead from cobra bites in Lamphun last year doing the same thing!

I have been in there with a weed whacker, and they hide til the last possible moment and then, when they think they are fucked they make a move, and if you have a pair of flip flops on, you are fucked!

[Missismiggins]

You sound a bit under the thumb and pussy whipped to me.

Yeah, but he has his online friends here to support him through this difficult period.

We are here for you Miggs. Hang in there mate.

I find shooting things helps me to get back in touch with my masculinity.

It certainly helps to vent the spleen!

[Boon Mee]

I forgot to shake out my boots before putting them on the other day and one of those little scorpions was in one. Actually didn't realize he was there as it was at the ball of the left foot until it started itching real bad. Sure glad scorpions in Thailand are not the size of the ones in the American Southwest...

Get slip-on boots, Miggens - a lot easier...

[Rural Surin]

Cant you get your child to tell her to go fuck herself ??

...and she considers him a 'hero'. Go figure.

[Missismiggins]

I forgot to shake out my boots before putting them on the other day and one of those little scorpions was in one. Actually didn't realize he was there as it was at the ball of the left foot until it started itching real bad. Sure glad scorpions in Thailand are not the size of the ones in the American Southwest...

Get slip-on boots, Miggens - a lot easier...

I wouldn't dismiss some of the scorpions here too quickly, there are some pretty nasty little brown ones that can hurt like buggery, don't think you will die from them though, otherwise I would have put them in my Mother in Laws Bed already.

There are also some nasty spiders too, they can take a good bite out of your toes if you don't shake out your "FLIP FLOPS"

[jandajoy]

The little ones are the dangerous ones IMO.

[Missismiggins]

The little ones are the dangerous ones IMO.

Indeed, same as little baby snakes!

The bigger they get the smarter they get, to the point where they get this understanding that you are too big to eat, at which point most of them don't even inject venom!

The babies don't comprehend this and just bite...hence the boots and the socks..a bit more millimetres of outer skin to get through than a pair of flip flops!

It is probably a different kind of viper and venom that is found in Pattaya and Bangkok than up here, the snakes down there probably strike at the wallet more than my stinking feet!

[Nawty]

Panzy......gumbies....I catch my snakes in flip flops.

I have a pair of sunglasses ready for the spitting cobras but.

[Missismiggins]

The little ones are the dangerous ones IMO.

Indeed, same as little baby snakes!

The bigger they get the smarter they get, to the point where they get this understanding that you are too big to eat, at which point most of them don't even inject venom!

The babies don't comprehend this and just bite...hence the boots and the socks..a bit more millimetres of outer skin to get through than a pair of flip flops!

It is probably a different kind of viper and venom that is found in Pattaya and Bangkok than up here, the snakes down there probably strike at the wallet more than my stinking feet!

I should have added, the other reason I wear boots is that a few years back, we were busy building the house and had loads of old wood around, like an arse, I stood on a four inch nail protruding from an old bit of wood....there is more shock than pain as it enters your heel and hits the bones, but believe me, the real pain is when you try to pull it out!

Then a visit to the quack for a couple of "NASTY" injections, and a follow up (which I did not go to due to the pain of the first) a few weeks later...no, flip flops are fine if you can see what you are walking on/in.

Last Lam Yai season my wife brought these idiots over to help pick the Lam Yai, not ten minutes after beginning work, one idiot in flip flops had trod on some of that lethal bamboo type grass, it went through his flip flop and right through the fleshy part of his foot! (I got the blame for the way I cut the grass!! ) how I laughed, as I watched him reclining in my wifes "Abdominiser" exercise machine...almost in a coma!