I had a bit read of TD, and headed off to bed, about 10.

Took the boy, who wanted to watch a movie, so to keep him quiet, I put on "Basket Case" he spent most of the time under the blankets in fear! (at least he was quiet)

Just as I thought it was time for nodding off, I get this 50KG weight on my head, that lets off the most stinking fart I have smelled in a long time...the fucker is still awake!

So, after I give it a few Jackie Chan kicks to its abdomen and the like, to which it only laughs, it pulls out this plastic toy gun!

This gun thing has TWO lasers, a bright red one and a very bright blue one. and I get them in the eyes!

Try it, it hurts and almost blinds you!

And the little shit is lying across the bed shouting "Daddy - Head Shot"...""Got Him Between the eyes"

Now I can't sleep!

Why I didn't put on a condom!