You might be a redneck if

[Norton]

I've noticed of late there are many members implying others are rednecks. Normally the accusations are aimed at Americans but redneckness goes beyond national borders. Below are a few of the several indications one might be a redneck. Take a look and be honest, no matter what your nationality, and let us know if you might be a redneck. Thanks to Jeff Foxworthy for the list.

1. More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
2. You think the stock market has a fence around it.
3. You think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.
4. You’ve ever lost a loved one to kudzu.
5. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
6. Your front porch collapses and kills more than three dogs.
7. You’ve ever used lard in bed.
8. Your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.
9. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
10. You’ve ever used a toilet seat as a picture frame.
11. Your home has more miles on it than your car.
12. Your Christmas tree is still up in June.
13. You’ve ever been arrested for loitering.
14. You think that potted meat on a saltine is an hors d’ouvre.
15. There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house.
16. You hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.
17. You’ve ever shot anyone for looking at you.
18. You own a homemade fur coat.
19. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
20. Your momma has "ammo" on her Christmas list.
21. You’ve totaled every car you’ve ever owned.
22. There are more than five McDonald’s bags currently on the floorboard of your car.
23. Momma taught you how to flip a cigarette.
24. There is a wasp nest in your living room.
25. The Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.
26. You give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.
27. There has ever been crime-scene tape on your front door.
28. You burn your front yard rather than mow it.
29. You consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
30. Fewer than half of your cars run.
31. You’ve ever been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.
32. The taillight covers of your car are made of tape.
33. Your car has never had a full tank of gas.
34. Any of your kids were conceived in a car wash.
35. Your momma has ever been involved in a cuss fight with the principal.
36. You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.
37. You’ve ever bathed with flea and tick soap.
38. Your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
39. Your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.
40. Your momma doesn’t remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass
41. You stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
42. Your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
43. You’ve ever been involved in a custody fight over a huntin’ dog.
44. You’re an expert on worm beds.
45. The dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.
46. Your wife has ever said, "Come move this transmission so I can take a bath!"
47. Your family tree does not fork.
48. The flood history of the area can be seen on your living room walls.
49. You haul more than U-Haul.
50. Your momma has ever stomped into the house and announced, "The feud is back on!"

And a bonus question for the ladies and a few others.

Your dress is strapless and your bra's not.

Last but not least

Your idea of a formal dinner is to use expensive toilet paper for napkins.

[barbaro]

I must say that being "redneck" dones not necesarrily mean being Southern.

Many rednecks are in the South but being Sounthern does not mean one is a redneck.

Peace.

[kingwilly]

1. More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general. nope.
2. You think the stock market has a fence around it. nope, it bloody well oought to though.
3. You think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test. nope but not really interested in it either
4. You’ve ever lost a loved one to kudzu. eeh ?
5. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years. nope
6. Your front porch collapses and kills more than three dogs. nope
7. You’ve ever used lard in bed. nope
8. Your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool. nope
9. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table. nope
10. You’ve ever used a toilet seat as a picture frame. nope surely not, please.
11. Your home has more miles on it than your car. nope
12. Your Christmas tree is still up in June. nope
13. You’ve ever been arrested for loitering. nope
14. You think that potted meat on a saltine is an hors d’ouvre. nope
15. There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house. nope
16. You hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice. nope
17. You’ve ever shot anyone for looking at you. nope
18. You own a homemade fur coat. nope
19. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.nope
20. Your momma has "ammo" on her Christmas list. nope - this list is just silly, I'm sure there are better ones there.
21. You’ve totaled every car you’ve ever owned. nope
22. There are more than five McDonald’s bags currently on the floorboard of your car. nope
23. Momma taught you how to flip a cigarette. nope
24. There is a wasp nest in your living room. nope - as i said before, silly list.
25. The Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.nope
26. You give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.nope
27. There has ever been crime-scene tape on your front door.nope
28. You burn your front yard rather than mow it.nope that's what one pay's a gardener for - mowing that is.
29. You consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.nope - but the bug rackets are fun...
30. Fewer than half of your cars run.nope - though at one stage i was a little close to this....
31. You’ve ever been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.nope
32. The taillight covers of your car are made of tape.nope
33. Your car has never had a full tank of gas.nope
34. Any of your kids were conceived in a car wash.what? nope
35. Your momma has ever been involved in a cuss fight with the principal.nope
36. You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.nope
37. You’ve ever bathed with flea and tick soap.nope
38. Your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.nope
39. Your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.nope
40. Your momma doesn’t remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her a-nope
41. You stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.nope
42. Your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.nope
43. You’ve ever been involved in a custody fight over a huntin’ dog.nope
44. You’re an expert on worm beds.nope
45. The dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.nope
46. Your wife has ever said, "Come move this transmission so I can take a bath!"nope
47. Your family tree does not fork.nope
48. The flood history of the area can be seen on your living room walls.nope
49. You haul more than U-Haul.nope
50. Your momma has ever stomped into the house and announced, "The feud is back on!"nope

[Norton]

Too quick for me KW. Didn't finish editing. Check the last question please.

[kingwilly]

MySpace.com - Top notch southern guy - 23 - Male - marietta ga, GEORGIA - www.myspace.com/b198517

[kingwilly]

Too quick for me KW. Didn't finish editing. Check the last question please.

sorry

Your dress is strapless and your bra's not.

that is a terrible fashion Fox Paws!

unless it is skin coloured straps, or clear. but even then a little bit euw.


*yes, I know it's spelled faux pas... just checking to see who are the clever dick pedants

[mellow]

Have you been spying on some of the TD members Norton?

[Rural Surin]

Is this an American pleasure? This 'redneck' classification....??

[Norton]

Is this an American pleasure? This 'redneck' classification....??

It is. Just a bit of fun. But you would know that having lived in the US.

[nedwalk]

i,m worried. too many of them questions are a little to close to answer honestly

[Norton]

i,m worried. too many of them questions are a little to close to answer honestly

Being as we know each other. Must have been the transmission in the bath tub one that got you worried. Just check the you betcha box.

[nedwalk]

dam and i was trying so hard to be indiscrete, but 18 24 29 31 37 38, two more numbers and i,ll have sups for the lotto, have all got me thinking

[barbaro]

Getting' slow......

[MeMock]

My neck is red at the moment.

Must remember to use more sun screen.

[dirtydog]

^Corks rubbing against your neck?

[MeMock]

No, it is the crocodile skin scarf that is giving me grief.

[November Rain]

Sod your quiz, Norts. I know I'm a redneck, because I keep forgetting my sunscreen and getting a burnt neck & shoulders when I'm working. How much more of a hint do I need?

[November Rain]

unless it is skin coloured straps, or clear.

FFS, baboon-butt, will you stop reading those fashion mags and thinking things are OK? Clear or flesh-coloured straps are a total no-no!

[MeMock]

baboon-butt

[Jet Gorgon]

Hey, Norts, you forgot the turkey balls around the inside windshield of your souped-up Ford truck and the gun rack with a couple of shotguns above the front seat. Lumberjack shirts or T-shirts with one of them sleeveless down vests (only in -40 degree weather), greasy Calgary Flames gimme caps, and stuff.

Yes, I am a redneck gal.

[Panda]

Are these people rednecks or would they be more appropriately called trailer trash?

[hillbilly]

Now why do you have to bring my family into this discussion?

[hillbilly]

Well ok, I might share a few family pics. Here is my sister...



I wish that she was my sister...

[helge]

pregnant and cigaret in hand.
My inner ear has Duelling Banjo's on the A-list

[hillbilly]

Us rednecks do enjoy our swimming.



We know how to relax.