Cross-road.

[Dalton]

In the last few month I've been feeling kind of depressed, things have taking a turn that affects everybody that I care about, it's like a train there's be derailed and you're walking through the wreck looking for survivors. And when you then get the pieces together, you realize that they have grown apart and they don't have anything in common except the taste of failure and defeat...Nothing left to say, just two emotionless faces starring at each other and a 15 year old boy standing on the side-line caught up in the mess.....

I'm standing at a cross-road, I can only hope that I walk the right way.

[davearn]

Heavy......

Whatever you choose to do will be the right decision whether it works out the way you want or not as I am sure you will make the decision with the best of intentions at the time.

Chin up, Dalts - "She'll be right, mate"

[Jet Gorgon]

Dalts, the only thing you can control is your own mind. You know that. Do the best you can for the boy. Remember, you have a life. And we love you.

[pai nai ma]

Life's a funny bird.

[Troubled]

I'm standing at a cross-road, I can only hope that I walk the right way.

Sorry to hear of your plight. I know the feeling and it can be all consuming at times. Really you can only do what you think is the right thing given the circumstances. Then try not to second guess yourself.

Alternatively you can pm me your choices and then do the opposite to the path I choose as it seems that on every occasion I have been facing a similar choice to yourself with hindsight i have taken the wrong option.

"If I only knew then what I know now"

Good luck with it all

[Rigger]

Cheer up mate its not all bad some bike bits turned up today

[AntRobertson]

Bloody hell Dalts. I wish I could say something more than the usual trivial 'keep your chin up' etc but I got nothing. Whatever happens best of luck!

[Sir Burr]

Don't know if this helps, but........

I was fortunate to be told a little pearl of wisdom when I was quite young and I still think it holds true today. It has certainly affected decisions that I have made in my life.

"Never rely on other people for your own happiness".

Make of it what you will.

[Dalton]

Thanks all of you (even Obi) my main goal is to make sure the boy will be alright, regarding my self then there is no other choice than go and find some work, to clear up the finacial mess and I have no problem with doing that. What really bothers me is that my wife and I still love each other, but problems with the business have made us fight to the point where we can't stand the sight of the other person...I don't know if I make any sense, I can't even understand it my self..

[friscofrankie]

In the last few month I've been feeling kind of depressed, things have taking a turn that affects everybody that I care about, it's like a train there's be derailed and you're walking through the wreck looking for survivors. And when you then get the pieces together, you realize that they have grown apart and they don't have anything in common except the taste of failure and defeat...Nothing left to say, just two emotionless faces starring at each other and a 15 year old boy standing on the side-line caught up in the mess.....

This has got to be the best use of English by a non-native speaker I've read in a long, long time.

'm standing at a cross-road, I can only hope that I walk the right way.

DO what's right for YOU. The rest will fall into place as you go along.

[kingwilly]

What really bothers me is that my wife and I still love each other, but problems with the business have made us fight to the point where we can't stand the sight of the other person...I don't know if I make any sense, I can't even understand it my self..

dont do it then mate.

perhaps counselling

perhaps a break/time out

sounds like you are just frustrated and fighting because of an outside source.

if one of you does something that you cannot take back, it will be forever with/between both of you.

living apart from your boy will be hard on everyone, if there is any way of avoiding that. then my advice is to follow that path!

[Dalton]

This has got to be the best use of English by a non-native speaker I've read in a long, long time.

Make sure that Pai nai ma (obi) reads that...

DO what's right for YOU. The rest will fall into place as you go along.

That's what I got to do, I'm really out of choices, so if there's anything left of our relationship, then it will accept the outcome, if not..Then it wasn't meant to be, and the sun will still raise tomorrow.

[Norton]

I'm really out of choices

Often a blessing that moves us to take positive action.

Do what you must and you will be fine.

[MisterStretch]

Ugly and sad as it is to say, money (stupid pieces of colored paper) account for more divorces than anything else.

Talk about that. If you really do love each other...fuck the money. It's only money. There's always some more around the corner...even if it's a long corner.

Talk to your boy, too. Let him know that there is love for him and the fight isn't about him. At that age, that's super important. I hope things work out.

Sending good vibes your way...and I don't even know you.

[keda]

Tried to post earlier but system kept freezing. which is common enough...Thanks for sharing, don't know the details but I'm sure they apply to most of us at some time in our lives. Hope it works out, and even if the outcome is unknown though adverse, best you can hope is to make the right decision based on whatever you can influence.

Excellent start is when you sift through the debris you can still see each other...work on that.

Good luck.

[Whiteshiva]

Difficult as it can be, Dalton - try to keep your spirits high. "If it doesn't kill you, it will make you stronger" - that kind of thinking.

Easy to say, I know, but one day you will be looking back at this time and laugh about it. Let me know next time you're in Bangers, and I'll buy you a few beers - I know a couple of places here that may cheer you up!

WS

[dirtydog]

^Oh great, here he is having problems and his relationship is deteriorating with his wife, and your gonna give him a tour of short time bars in Bangkok

[Dalton]

^ That aint the worst thing there could happen....

[Whiteshiva]

^Oh great, here he is having problems and his relationship is deteriorating with his wife, and your gonna give him a tour of short time bars in Bangkok

Not exactly - I was going to take him to Siam Square on a Monday morning.

He'll be seeing cute office girls and university students going to work/school, plus the typical English teachers going to their low-paid boring jobs. The former will make him feel like a million dollars, and the latter will remind him that no matter how shitty life can be at the moment, there are always someone out there who is far worse off.

Then, later inthe day, we'll hit the bars.....

[spiff]

What really bothers me is that my wife and I still love each other, but problems with the business have made us fight to the point where we can't stand the sight of the other person...I don't know if I make any sense, I can't even understand it my self..

Getting away from the business for a bit might provide space for other thoughts. When have you last had a holiday together?

[El Gibbon]

there are always someone out there who is far worse off.

.

I have lived this scenario and am alive to tell you it is true!

Good luck

E. G.

[Looper]

The only thing I would suggest is not to make any big decisions while you are feeling under it. Usually better to soldier on until things feel better before making any big choices I find.

The other thing I would say is not to always follow other people's advice as they are sometimes talking bollocks.

[paulsmithson]

Fight Dalton- Fight I is just like the bike when you hit a bump in the road and it takes off or a corner that you went into full throttle then realise you are going too fast, you make it work out or you come off!
The only thing that is sure is that if you bottle out you are going to get hurt!
After such a along time together I would suggest that wtatyou have is valuable.
Talk to her and try to control the slide.Like on a bike you could recover it.

[tsicar]

[quote=Whiteshiva;760626]

no matter how shitty life can be at the moment, there are always someone out there who is far worse off.

remembering the above will help you to get your mind right. it is a trick i use when i am down (and i have been down)
the worst thing you can possibly do is to allow yourself to feel sorry for yourself, since this will cloud your vision, and probably lead you in the wrong direction.

difficult as it may be, try to focus on the way forward, and, truly, there is ALWAYS a way forward.
make a priority list-(write it down) of the things you CAN fix, and push the things you can't, to lower down on your list- i am sure you will find that if you start at the beginning, when you get further down the list, solutions to the "impossible" will start to emerge.
try to stay focused: very important
good luck

[Loy Toy]

15 year old boy standing on the side-line caught up in the mess.....

You still definately have one thing in common and thats the little guy sitting on the side lines.

Both of your priorities should be for him first and foremost, work together with his mum and for his sake and you never know what may happen.

Mate you, in fact your family have been through an absolute nightmare in the last few months and I hope that this new problem has not sprung up because of the terrible pressure you have all been under. An absolute shame if a family should break up over something you had no control over.

Good luck and my best wishes to the Daltons.