So I getz back from me cycle, all sweaty and buzzed up off Slipknot's classic debut album.


Before I know it I'm on me sofa and feeling around inside of me right ear. Something in there feels oddly circular on me fingertip.

Right then, where are the cotton buds. Shove one in and give it a good ol' wriggle n tiggle. Jam it right in to make a homemade twiglet.

Suck on that badboy, but notice that the soothing sounds of the Chinese neighbours screaming at each other sound oddly underwater-ish.



Fok.









Spot the difference.


Got it in so deep that can't feel it with finger now.


Amputation?

I like Van Gogh, but not sure I want to model my bodily modifications on 'im.

6 weeks to live?

Destined to listen to the intricacies of Extreme Norwegian Gore Metal as if I'm in a bubble bath?