Off Topic blighters. Who are the worst offenders?

[Luckydog]

It really is a bit Mucking Futch when an interesting and informative thread is hijacked by Gits who take a sadistic delight in ruining it by going off about something totally stupid........

They should be boycoted imo.

[Begbie]

You don't hear the word "blighter" very often these days. I wonder what the derivation is ?

[ChiangMai noon]

I like the word chockablock.

is it one word or 3?

[Begbie]

^conjures mental pictures of a blocked toilet. Probably started as three words but common usage ...

[AntRobertson]

I'm undecided as to what to have for lunch today. I'm leaning toward... anyone seen that movie 'Man of the Year'?

[ChiangMai noon]

conjures mental pictures of a blocked toilet. Probably started as three words but common usage

Interestingly enough, Turks are convinced it derives from the Turkish "chok" (very). kalabalik (crowded).......

I'm not so sure about that though.

[Thetyim]

I like the word chockablock.

A Chockablock is very similar to a Topic but of course without the peanuts

[rawlins]

Never seen 'Man of The Year'... don't think I ever want to.

I'm heading off shift in half an hour.... Should I go to the gym or just straight to bed and have a wank?

[AntRobertson]

I'm heading off shift in half an hour.... Should I go to the gym or just straight to bed and have a wank?

Depends, do you prefer H&P or Lee & Perrins sauces?

[rawlins]

Depends, do you prefer H&P or Lee & Perrins sauces?

Do you mean HP? Horses for courses... Lee and Perrins for my soup and HP for just about everything else...

I have decided I'm going to try and set a personal 20 minute record on the rowing machine.... Then I'll see if I can muster up enough energy for a wank after that when I'm all snug in my bunk...

[kingwilly]

Should I go to the gym or just straight to bed and have a wank?

dont be having a wank in indo - you'll lose your head!

[DrB0b]

Idiots! Of course global warming is man made.

[rawlins]

Who the bejings is in 'indo'?

I'm bobbing about in the Gulf of Mexico.... Safe enough for a wank here isn't it?... You have me worried now.

[watterinja]

Bic.Lighters can be hazardous...

[November Rain]

Isn't chock-a-block hyphenated?

Anyone any idea what the origins of the word "hyphen" are? Sounds a bit Greek to me, but I'm not much good at classical languages.

[Thaddeus]

I've just found fifty Baht down the back of my sofa.

[DrB0b]

Isn't chock-a-block hyphenated?

Anyone any idea what the origins of the word "hyphen" are? Sounds a bit Greek to me, but I'm not much good at classical languages.

hy·phen
[Late Latin, from Greek huphen, a sign indicating a compound or two words which are to be read as one, from huph' hen, in one : hupo, under; see hypo– + hen, neuter of heis, one.]


hyphen: Definition and Much More from Answers.com

[watterinja]

Anyone any idea what the origins of the word "hyphen" are? Sounds a bit Greek to me, but I'm not much good at classical languages.

An ancient Nordic greeting... Hi Fen... Heydo, tak se mukke

[Texpat]

More of a dash man myself -- if you know what I mean.
But when it comes to hyphens, I especially enjoy compound modifiers like on-time takeoffs or real-life stories and big-ole titties.

Dumb-ass threads also comes to mind.

[AntRobertson]

Isn't chock-a-block hyphenated?

Anyone any idea what the origins of the word "hyphen" are? Sounds a bit Greek to me, but I'm not much good at classical languages.

hy·phen
[Late Latin, from Greek huphen, a sign indicating a compound or two words which are to be read as one, from huph' hen, in one : hupo, under; see hypo– + hen, neuter of heis, one.]


hyphen: Definition and Much More from Answers.com

There's a joke utilising the word "hymen" in there that I can't be arsed pulling off right now.

[kingwilly]

when an interesting and informative thread is hijacked

do we have interesting and informative threads on TD then? noone told me!

[NickA]

Spoonerism

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This article needs additional citations for verification.
Please help improve this article by adding reliable references. Unsourced material may be challenged and removed. (January 2007) A spoonerism is a play on words in which corresponding consonants, vowels, or morphemes are switched (see metathesis). It is named after the Reverend William Archibald Spooner (1844–1930), Warden of New College, Oxford, who was notoriously prone to this tendency.
While spoonerisms are commonly heard as slips of the tongue (sometimes spoonerised as tips of the slung), they are considered a form of pun when used purposely as a play on words.
Contents

[hide]

• 1 Examples of spoonerisms
• 2 Modern usage
• 3 Kniferism and forkerism
• 4 Spoonerism in other languages
  • 4.1 Danish
  • 4.2 Dutch
  • 4.3 Finnish
  • 4.4 French
  • 4.5 German
  • 4.6 Greek
  • 4.7 Hebrew
  • 4.8 Hungarian
  • 4.9 Icelandic
  • 4.10 Polish
  • 4.11 Serbian, Bosnian or Croatian
  • 4.12 Spanish
  • 4.13 Swedish
  • 4.14 Vietnamese
• 5 See also
• 6 References
• 7 External links

[edit] Examples of spoonerisms

Many of the quotations attributed to Spooner are apocryphal; The Oxford Dictionary of Quotations (3rd edition, 1979) lists only one substantiated spoonerism: "The weight of rages will press hard upon the employer."
Some of the more famous quotations attributed to Spooner include, "The Lord is a shoving leopard," (instead of "The Lord is a loving shepherd"), "It is kisstomary to cuss the bride," ("It is customary to kiss the bride") and, "Mardon me, padam, this pie is occupewed. Can I sew you to another sheet?" (Pardon me, madam, this pew is occupied. Can I show you to another seat?")
Other purported gaffes include his angry address to a student, "You have hissed all my mystery lectures, and were caught fighting a liar in the quad. Having tasted two worms, you will leave by the next town drain" (intending to say "You missed all my history lectures," "lighting a fire," "wasted two terms," and "down train," respectively). He supposedly remarked to one lady, during a college reception, "You'll soon be had as a matter of course," when he meant to say, "You'll soon be mad as a Hatter of course." Others include, "Let us raise our glasses to the queer old Dean," ("dear old queen"), "We'll have the hags flung out," ("flags hung out"), "a half-warmed fish," ("half-formed wish"), "Is the bean dizzy?" ("dean busy'), "Go and shake a tower," ("take a shower") and "a well-boiled icicle." ("well-oiled bicycle"). He supposedly began a speech to a school of girls sitting on hard seats by saying: "What am I to tell this audience of beery wenches?". (What am I to tell this audience of weary benches?".)
He also reportedly, in an address to a group of miners, commended them, "You are all tons of soil," meaning to say, "You are all sons of toil."

[edit] Modern usage

In modern terms, a spoonerism is any changing of sounds in this manner. While simple enough to do, a clever spoonerism is one that results in a funny phrase or sentence. "Flutterby" is an oft-cited example of a spoonerism that has not lost its original meaning. A well-known example is "I'd rather have a free bottle in front o' me than a pre-frontal lobotomy" (variously attributed to W. C. Fields, Tom Waits, and most commonly Dorothy Parker), which not only shifts the beginning sounds of the word lobotomy, but the entire phrase "frontal lobotomy".
When a digraph such as 'sh', 'ch', 'ph', etc... is used, both letters are moved to preserve the original verbal sound. For example, 'Cheer for Dennis' would be 'Deer for Chennis.'
Best described or illustrated to new English speakers would be the transposition of the first staccato or plosive in a word pair such as: Peer Dark.



[edit] Kniferism and forkerism

Douglas Hofstadter uses the nonce terms kniferism and forkerism to refer to interchanging the nuclei and codas, respectively, of syllables. (Example: a British TV newsreader who, in a story about a crime scene, referred to the police removing a 'hypodeemic nerdle'.) Spoonerisms exchange the onsets.
Another example is an incident that happened to veteran newscaster (and Timex watch pitchman) John Cameron Swayze. During an interview on The Mike Douglas Show, he stated that on a radio show, he was making reference to a fellow journalist as a "noted woman columnist" but accidentally said "noted woolen communist".

[edit] Spoonerism in other languages

Spoonerisms are prolific in a few other languages. For example, the quirks of the selection of phonemes lend themselves well to this purpose.

[edit] Danish

The Danish term for spoonerism is "bakke snagvendt", which is itself a spoonerism of "snakke bagvendt" (i.e., talk backwards). The term is derived from a song by the puppet stars of the children's TV-show Kaj og Andrea. The song itself contains mainly spoonerisms based on the swapping around of one or two phonemes rather than syllables or morphemes.

[edit] Dutch

Spoonerisms in Dutch are made in the same manner as in English. For example: "met vereende krachten" will become "met verkrachte eenden" (Translated: "with joined forces" spoonerised into: "with raped ducks"). Another example is "tot de schijt ons doodt" instead of "tot de dood ons scheidt" (translated: "until the shit kills us" from "until death do us part"). "Ik heb den Dolf ondergespit" i.p.v. "ik heb het onderspit gedolven" (I have buried Adolf instead of I suffered a defeat)

[edit] Finnish

Finnish sananmuunnokset (literal translation 'word transformations' does not capture the spoonerism hidden in the original Finnish compound) are mainly used in jokes. Before transformation a Finnish spoonerism is something innocent and after transformation something obscene. A Finnish spoonerism is usually performed by telling the innocent version and letting the listener figure out the outcome.

[edit] French

The French contrepèterie is also facilitated by a strong Rabelaisian tradition for coarse, if witty, humor. Contrepéteurs excel in finding in seeming innocuous phrases the elements for the lewd and humorous. According to French tradition—and unlike the examples provided below—one should never utter nor write the second part of a spoonerism. Only the first part should be said, leaving readers or listeners trying hard to find the second funny part. Actually giving the solution of a spoonerism is considered distasteful.
This is somewhat similar to certain English language jokes involving spoonerisms, in which one asks questions like "What is the difference between a rooster and a lawyer?" and provides only the non-spoonerised part of the answer ("One clucks defiance..."), leaving the usually-vulgar punch-line ("...the other fucks the clients") for the listener to come up with, although it is far more subtle without the explicit joke formulation.
A famous example is the weekly column "Sur l'Album de la Comtesse" in the French weekly satirical journal Le Canard Enchaîné.
- For example, Les nouilles cuisent au jus de cane : les couilles nuisent au cul de Jeanne (which translates roughly as, the noodles are cooking in a duck broth: the balls hurt Jane's arse). The s and l in jus and cul are silent in French.
One from French comedian Coluche: Quand les Nippons bougent, la Chine se dresse : quand les nichons bougent, la pine se dresse (which translates as, when the Japanese stir, China reacts : when the boobs jiggle, the wood rises).
Similarly, the French word for a tumble dryer, un sèche-linge, could give rise to a spoonerism un lèche-singe which would mean a person who licks monkeys.
A French radio announcer was reputed to say, instead of Les populations immenses du Cap (the immense population of Cap-Haïtien): Les copulations immenses du Pape. (The Pope's immense copulations).

[edit] German

The German Schüttelreim ('shake rhyme') is a rhyme where the initial consonants (or even the following vowels) of the last two stressed syllables are exchanged with one another. For example, Es klapperte die Klapperschlang', — bis ihre Klapper schlapper klang. (by Heinz Erhardt) - The rattlesnake rattled, until its rattles sounded flabbier.
A popular spoonerism in German derives from the German adaptation of the TV-show Saturday Night Live (German Title: RTL Samstag Nacht). A series of sketches was aired which had the title Kentucky schreit ficken. This spoonerism of Kentucky Fried Chicken means: Kentucky yells fuck. This was a parody on TV ads for McDonald's which used spoonerisms.

[edit] Greek

In Greek, when someone has accidentally committed spoonerism (Σαρδαμ in Greek), it's common to apologize by saying "Γλώσσεψα τη μπέρδα μου", which is in fact a spoonerism (or rather for "Μπέρδεψα τη γλώσσα μου". It roughly translates to saying "I tongued my slip" instead of "I slipped my tongue". The word sardam is derived from a person named Mardas, who was, like Spooner, prone to verbal mistakes.

[edit] Hebrew

Hebrew speakers sometimes make fun of word pairs, where the two words are somehow similar, by flipping letters between the two to produce a pair of meaningless words, but such that the listener can easily figure the original meaning. Examples: First letter flipping -- "Zahag Nahir" (instead of "Nahag Zahir" (Hebrew: נהג זהיר‎) meaning "Careful driver") and "Chipor Tzirbena" (actually creating a cleaner form of the foul "Tzipor Chirbena" (Hebrew: ציפור חירבנה‎) meaning "A bird has defecated"). Two letter flip -- "Kesh VaChetzet" (instead of "Chetz VaKeshet" (Hebrew: חץ וקשת‎) meaning "An arrow and a bow"). Last letter flip -- "Chatzi Goom Aroof" (instead of "Chatzi Goof Aroom" (Hebrew: חצי גוף ערום‎) meaning "Half body is naked").
The Israeli hip-hop band "Hadag Nachash (or Nahash)," is a spoonerism. The group's name literally means "The Snake Fish" (Hebrew: הדג נחש‎ — "Ha" meaning "the", "Dag" meaning "fish", and "Nachash" meaning "snake"). It is also, however, a Hebrew spoonerism. In Israel, people who have only recently gotten their driver's licence place a tag on their back window with the words: "Nahag Chadash" (Hebrew: נהג חדש‎ — "new driver"). There is also a joke, in which a Kibbutz volunteer tells in bad Hebrew that his job there is "Lezayen Metim" (Hebrew: לזיין מתים‎) meaning "To fuck dead people," instead of "Lemayen Zeytim" (Hebrew: למיין זיתים‎) meaning "To sort olives."

[edit] Hungarian

The Hungarian kecskerím (goat rhyme) is a rhyming form where there are two rhyming words in each line, and in the second line, the starting letters of the rhyming words are exchanged, like "Ne ülj le a kőre, pandúr, / Megkarmol egy pőre kandúr!" (Don't sit on the stone, policeman, as a naked tomcat will scratch you!). Another example of Hungarian spoonerism is creating word pairs like "Vali fejlesztése" (Vali's development) and "Lali fejvesztése" (Lali's beheading).

[edit] Icelandic

In Icelandic the closest word to spoonerism is "stafarugl", -a jumble of letters. This word is more commonly used for anagrams. One humourous Icelandic spoonerism is about buying popcorn and a Coca Cola drink: "Mig langar að fá kokk og pók, takk fyrir". The humour of this statement is most fully appreciated with an understanding of both Icelandic and English.

[edit] Polish

Jokes based on spoonerisms are quite popular in Polish; they are collectively called as Gra półsłówek ('A play with monosyllables'). They often require a bit of imagination in order to find out which letters need to be changed to get a new meaning. Very often the new meaning is more or less rude. The game's name itself is a spoonerism — switching the bolded letters results in Sra półgłówek, which means 'A dim-witted one is having a shit'. Some Polish sports commentators are also well-known for their spoonerisms, made unwittingly in the heat of the action.

[edit] Serbian, Bosnian or Croatian

Spoonerisms are easy to construct in Serbian language, Bosnian language or Croatian language, since the alphabet is entirely phonetic and one letter always represents one sound. The new meanings are often rude. Example: pita od višanja ('a cherry pie') turns into vita od pišanja ('she went slim by urinating').

[edit] Spanish

In Spanish, a spoonerism is usually used as a euphemism. For example, "Una cabra de bolones", instead of "Una bola de cabrones" ("a granite goat" instead of "a bunch of assholes").
When an unintentional Spoonerism is committed, it is common to say "Se me lenguó la traba", a Spoonerism for "Se me trabó la lengua" (My tongue got stuck).

[edit] Swedish

Similar jokes are told in Swedish, conventionally stating which one of two similar-sounding options the teller would prefer, as in: Bättre en back läsk i hallen än ett läskigt hack i ballen. meaning "Rather a crate of sodas in the hall than a horrible cut in the wang." Other examples include Bättre att borsta katten än att kasta bort den ("Better to brush the cat than throwing it away") and Bättre att frysa i tältet än att tälta i frysen ("Better to freeze in your tent than tenting in your freezer."), Bättre att pissa i en stupränna än att stupa i en pissränna ("It's better to pee in a rain gutter than to fall in a urinal") and Hellre en rövare i poolen än en polare i röven ("Rather a robber in the pool than a friend in your arse"). Another example is Hellre en Daim i handen än en hand i dajmen ("Rather a Daim in your hand than a hand in your arse").
The phenomenon is commonly referred to as Bala Taklänges, which translates into "Beaking Spackwards".

[edit] Vietnamese

Spoonerisms are the basis for many jokes, riddles, and other word play. Vietnamese, being a monosyllabic language, is especially suited to this type of word play. In polysyllabic languages, spoonerisms often cannot significantly change the words involved, and spoonerisms are easily deciphered. As a result, their value for word play is severely limited. In monosyllabic languages, spoonerisms can completely change the meaning of an entire sentence. In Vietnamese, there exist many complex jokes and riddles involving the interchange of initial sounds, vowels, or even tones over multiple steps, with each intermediate step being a valid, clever construction.

[edit] See also

• Malapropism
• Tongue-twister
• Feghoot

from Spoonerism - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[Spin]

Topic

Went off those

Used to enjoy a double decker or three though

[NickA]

Nonce word

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(Redirected from Nonce terms)

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A nonce word is a word used only "for the nonce"—to meet a need that is not expected to recur. Quark, for example, was a nonce word appearing only in James Joyce's Finnegans Wake until Murray Gell-Mann quoted it to name a new class of subatomic particle. The use of the term nonce word in this way was apparently the work of James Murray, the influential editor of the Oxford English Dictionary.
Nonce words frequently arise through the combination of an existing word with a familiar prefix or suffix, in order to meet a particular need (or as a joke). The result is a special kind of pseudoword: although it would not be found in any dictionary, it is instantly comprehensible (e.g., bananular phone). If the need recurs (or the joke is widely enjoyed), nonce words easily enter regular use (initially as neologisms) just because their meaning is obvious.
Nonce words are often created as part of pop culture and advertising campaigns.
In cryptography, a nonce is a random, arbitrary number that is generated for security purposes and is used one time only.
The term should not be confused with the British slang word nonce, meaning a sex offender.

[edit] Examples

• Slithy, as a portmanteau of "slimy" and "lithe"; one of several used by Lewis Carroll in Jabberwocky.
• "Runcible spoon", from Edward Lear, which later came to describe a curved fork with a cutting edge.
• Unidexter - a one-legged person of the right-legged persuasion. Coined by comedian Peter Cook in One Leg Too Few.
• Aequeosalinocalcalinoceraceoaluminosocupreovitriol ic, one of the English language's longest words according to the book The Dictionary, was used once in describing a particular British aquarium's water.
• Surlecultant in French, meaning that gets you to sit down in a rather vulgar manner. A rough translation would be 'onto-the-arse-ing'.
• Contrafibularity was one of several nonce words used by the fictional Edmund Blackadder to confuse the lexicographer Samuel Johnson, whom he despised.
• Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious from the musical Mary Poppins.
• Vquex, used in a game of Scrabble in The Sacred Diary of Adrian Plass Aged 37¾ and claimed to mean a cross between a ferret and a giraffe.
• Querafancible in the works of Robert A. Heinlein, (some unspecified thing in a bathroom).

[edit] See also

• Hapax legomenon
• Neologism
• Sniglet

I'd never heard of a nonce word before, I'd always thought it was another name for the welsh language.

[Luckydog]

Right. That's it! You are all BLIGHTERS!