So, with a sprog on the way and a very hairy dog ruining all my furniture, the wife decided we should make use of the shithole of the back garden.

"I'm the man, bitch.. I'll deal with it" I croaked in my husky, manly voice.

As I regained consciousness I overheard Wifeyİ organizing everything on the phone. I didn't challenge this as I didn't want to upset the poor delicate flower, and not because I'm scared of her, no matter what all my 'friends' say.

I took it upon myself to create a detailed plan on my computer so that these imbeciles will know what to do.

The outside.




My plan. cement floor, wood wall, with a space for me washing machine and my laundry. that leaves enough room for the dog and some pretty flowers.



"oi, you twat. you forgot the roof. your dogs gonna get all wet" i can hear you mumble in that horrible northern dialect that you working class people are so fond of.

If i'd put the roof in that plan you wouldnt be able to see inside silly! so i did a separate one for that!

It should def be made of a typical roofy substance and I think it should go on the top. something around this colour.




I sent the Wifeİ out to buy some metally stuff the other day and K.Banok will arrive on Monday to start destroying my house.

Brilliantly, my Mother-in-Law has decided to look over things while we are working. Very unfortunate that I have a long meeting lasting until around the time she leaves as I would have loved to spend some quality time with her.