Hangover remedies

[david44]

Like many of us the drinks were to many or too various

Here are a selection of tried and tested suggestions

Obviously the wisest move is experience and FOREPLAY

1 Don't mix grain and grape,never ever
Golden rule often overlooked at open buffet
wedding type where after the aperitifs champagne,fine wines a few brandies 19 lagers then rounded off by petrol thinners and Lah Khao in the back passage with the serving wenches.

2 When invited tfor a few shandies with the likes of Hoota or Checkbillstoke line you insides, A pint of milk,yoghurt or similar white fluids + SOLID Food.
A steak and kidney pudding,haddock and chips or a vindaloo my own tips.

3 Just because free doubles or novelty cocktails are offered there is no obligation to quaff them Pineapple chunks Kahlua and Mezcal seldom sit well ona steady gallon of your lunchtime Blanc de blanc,Beaujolais, Tooheys Old ,Guinness or case of Chang so favoured by Oriental sommeliers.

4 The top shelf of exotic bars and any luminous substances need be strained via condom AVOID,bottles with lewd ladies,lizards and gizzards or pictures of horned beasts are for gifts.

So having ignored above you awake under a camel drover in the rear of Lahore bus station ,where in 1975 the latrines were the wall.


1 Water REHYDRATE REHYDRATE REHYDRATE.
While prpopa Docs aver it possible to drown or drink too much H2O few with a hangover will stand long enough to approach the overquaff.

2 Very STRONG BLACK COFFEE often disparaged by amateurs is a must
While iLLy and Lavazza are a sound investment even the awful Suzuki,Zolito even Thai 3 in 1 is better than nothing in emergencies.

If near an espresso machine operated by a nubile lass the aroma sound and bend to delivery may begin to reach places that Alka sexer won't

3 DOC DAVE'S Meds PHASE
A tot of Fernet Branca,Underberg (a German snifta sold in 50cl Bandeliros in much of East Europe hard to find in Slyam)
or in direst emergency Mondragora the hallucigenic Patxaran only sold in lier full stregth at Bozate in the Republic of Baztan.While curing the hangover you may change sex and or hair colour daily
Notation licor mandragora 50cl | Uvinum

For those with forethought to stock 2 paracetemol will speed normalization unless you need to handle dangerous apparatus like Thai lady rotary mower or soi dog,Thai pharmacies will sell you anything and give you a chair glass of water.Quiet appreciation or a huble wai is more acceptable than the loud wind often proffered

4 THE RELINING PHASE

While for health ,slimming or aethetic grounds most Irish food like the women is poisonous it is at this time the final remedy.

THE ULSTER FRY or its limp pastiche the full English comes into its own
Ireland: Ulster Fry (March 10, 2008) | European Cuisines


Basic set to inc

Fried Bread
Fried Sausages
Fried Tomato
Fried Eggs
Fried Bacon
Fried White and Black Pudding

While not strictly authentic basically the fridge contents as long as fried in bacon fat
For a healthy balance and to replace lost gases a full tin of sauted Baked Beans,apprentice boys,apprentice ladyboys and Americans may wish to add a sprig of Holly.

Obviously such a light snack will have side orders of Toast and butter and a glass of blackbush for those able to read the label unaided at 2 hands.

Danger sign if the end of your sausage has split open like a pansy or lettuce,wedges of pineapple etc sneak on to your plate you are in the wrong diner or your Nongs need re-training.

RECOVERY PHASE
After this I find a massage with a warm girl and Bangkok Pist sits vacant page a handy adjunct for the emergency dump.

Those Hi-sos with the so called indoor plumbing should open the windows, play some soothing refreain from James Marshall Hendrix,Motohead or the
Ride of the Valkyrie as nature takes it course,then back to the bar with the emptys for a re-load.

Some swear by a toot or a cheroot on the 'dark side',each to his bone I say.

[somtamslap]

Wetherspoons all day brunch

+

10 + pints of lager and ale

+

Steak and cheese Subway consumed in bed

=

No hangover whatsoever

[Necron99]

TLDR...

Just drink more Chang and you will be fine.

[somtamslap]

Just drink more Chang and you will be fine.

Until you stop. Then you will be very fucking buggered indeed.

[Necron99]

Just drink more Chang and you will be fine.

Until you stop. Then you will be very fucking buggered indeed.

Bruce Banner's secret? He is always angry.
Necron99's secret? He doesn't stop.

[hooter]

^ What Necron says........

Stay semi pissed and continuously top-up as needed.

[rebbu]

Frenzied masterbation followed by more frenzied masterbation. Fry-up from any one of the wonderful countries that have them. A safe, easy almost pedestrian wank. Then back on the rant.

[somtamslap]

Frenzied masterbation followed by more frenzied masterbation. Fry-up from any one of the wonderful countries that have them. A safe, easy almost pedestrian wank. Then back on the rant.

That's just a normal day. What about hangover cures?

[rebbu]

Frenzied masterbation followed by more frenzied masterbation. Fry-up from any one of the wonderful countries that have them. A safe, easy almost pedestrian wank. Then back on the rant.

That's just a normal day. What about hangover cures?

Oh. I thought we were talking about work routines.
Hangover cures hmm. Frenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbationFrenzied masterbation

[Latindancer]

A doobie, then after a bit of whatever fun you fancy, sliding into the delightful oblivion of a langourous afternoon sleep.

[ENT]

A doobie, then after a bit of whatever fun you fancy, sliding into the delightful oblivion of a langourous afternoon sleep.

So much for your wowsering anti-ganja, anti-smoking, anti-anything non-vegatarian, hypocrite.

[Rural Surin]

Sleep & water....

[pseudolus]

Go to the pharmacy, right now, and get a small canister of Oxygen. They sell for about 500 baht in disposable form. When you wake up and can not make it to a water source, pop the cap off, lie down and inhale deeply for about 10 minutes. 12 minutes might be required when redbull has been involved.

Hang over gone.

[rebbu]

Go to the pharmacy, right now, and get a small canister of Oxygen. They sell for about 500 baht in disposable form. When you wake up and can not make it to a water source, pop the cap off, lie down and inhale deeply for about 10 minutes. 12 minutes might be required when redbull has been involved.

Hang over gone.

Wow, really? Got to try this.

[dobella]

Somtamslap has got it right, the only cure is more of the same albeit less so than the night before.

[dobella]

Hang over gone.
__________________

You're right there with the oxygen blast, working offshore could not drink but into the ports we used we were hammered and the medic gave us blasts of pure oxygen in the morning after and a shot of B12 just to get us up and running.

[pseudolus]

Wow, really? Got to try this.

You're right there with the oxygen blast, working offshore could not drink but into the ports we used we were hammered and the medic gave us blasts of pure oxygen in the morning after and a shot of B12 just to get us up and running.

Went to my office in KL once and asked why the o2 bill was so high each month in the sick bay when it is rarely used. I was told about this little trick and swear by it now.

[rebbu]

Wow, really? Got to try this.

You're right there with the oxygen blast, working offshore could not drink but into the ports we used we were hammered and the medic gave us blasts of pure oxygen in the morning after and a shot of B12 just to get us up and running.

Went to my office in KL once and asked why the o2 bill was so high each month in the sick bay when it is rarely used. I was told about this little trick and swear by it now.

Excellent. Thanks. i'll buy one tomorrow and test it out the day after.

[chassamui]

Full English and strong coffee.
Paracetomol and Brufen washed down with a bloody mary.

My personal tip is to trade the fried eggs for poached.

[Albert Shagnastier]

In the rare occassion I get a hangover, I've drunk to the point where there is no cure until you're eyes are bleeding, your nose is running and the recovery can only begin when the fluorescent yellow stinking bile has appeared.

[Hawker]

Percocets , heroine or OxyContin.

Anything with opium in it. Everything else is just toosh.

[Albert Shagnastier]

Percocets , heroine or OxyContin. Anything with opium in it. Everything else is just toosh.

So you're saying the most demonised drug on the planet is also the most beneficial?

Rhetorical

[Hawker]

Percocets , heroine or OxyContin. Anything with opium in it. Everything else is just toosh.

So you're saying the most demonised drug on the planet is also the most beneficial?

Rhetorical

There is many legitimate uses for opium. It doesn't do physical harm to your body if you use it as needed. It is demonized by the American anti drug boogeyman. Chain smoking is way worse then doing opium when you are hung over.

[Rural Surin]

Percocets , heroine or OxyContin. Anything with opium in it. Everything else is just toosh.

So you're saying the most demonised drug on the planet is also the most beneficial?

Rhetorical

Yes....
Deep and enriched rhetoric invented by them that we absorb and accept so easily.

[Albert Shagnastier]

There is many legitimate uses for opium

Yes - that's why it's the most used erb in every hospital on the planet.

It doesn't do physical harm to your body if you use it as needed

Check.

It is demonized by the American anti drug boogeyman

Who happen to be the biggest producers, smugglers and dealers of it.