Manchester Utd

**harrybarracuda** · 19-11-2021, 10:38 PM

Arf.

"If you don't know who Salt Bae is, he's a bloke who sprinkles salt in a vaguely amusing way, and somehow turned that gag into a £50 million restaurant empire.

The Turkish chef - who we're still hoping is actually a Sacha Baron Cohen character - recently opened a London outpost, where he serves £1500 steaks covered in edible gold leaf.

Naturally this soulless business lounge is a magnet for footballers like Wayne Rooney, David Beckham and, it turns out, former Spurs gaffer Mauricio Pochettino, who popped in the other day.

The Argentine - among the favourites for the Man United job - was filmed spunking ungodly sums of cash on overpriced, incoherent dross. He'll fit right in at Old Trafford."

**Joe 90** · 20-11-2021, 01:00 AM

Originally Posted by harrybarracuda

The Argentine - among the favourites for the Man United job - was filmed spunking ungodly sums of cash on overpriced, incoherent dross. He'll fit right in at Old Trafford."

**david44** · 20-11-2021, 01:27 AM

Originally Posted by Joe 90

He received the Freedom of Aberdeen in 2017, and features in a new hall of heroes in Provost Skene's House

So he won't pay to enter Museum, like all other Aberdonians, hence the common nesh end expression for deserted terraces, like Aberdeen on a Flag Day.
Law has a special place in the heart of Manchester's premier team

"The scorer of what proved to be the winning goal for Manchester City in United's penultimate game was former United player Denis Law, who scored with a back-heel in the 81st minute. relegated, United then lost their last game of the season, against sixth-placed Stoke City

Originally Posted by helge

Vanløse, Copehagen anno 1971 or there abouts.
David is a man of the world and his flair for language is only equalled by his cruelty to irish blues musicians

Yøur Swedish theta eater in Angrit it is Fan lose in 1971 anno domi know, Rabid is a fan of the whirl and flair for sandwich by his cutey Oirish blue Movies , please use a slap checker before assing such makeless assertions on my ørgan of rekord.

Oh here's THAT goal sheer class, tho Denis is ambivalent in the clip

Poor Alex I has the pleasure of coaching from him and Peter the Cat at my unsucceslul bid to be an apprentice keeper. Both great keeper sin an Era of Banks Shilts too, in an era when fullbacks had balls were heavy and keepers could be barged , the fairies today wouldn't last til half time on the boggy mire at Gillingham or Brisbane Rd on foggy February nights, The only warmth and comfort was when someone threw or pissed warm Bovril down ter leg on unprotected terraces.

**helge** · 20-11-2021, 01:50 AM

Originally Posted by david44

for sandwich by his cutey Oirish

Her name was Kathleen;she seduced me, hauled me off to a bar/casino hopping. A young business woman; the stout and chubby lass she was.

Refused to leave for a business meeting in Hamburg the next day.

I was charming and she was freckled and ginger

I'll never forget you, Kathleen

**david44** · 20-11-2021, 01:56 AM

Originally Posted by helge

I'll never forget you, Kathleen

Sit down calmly and stop deraileuring this fine testament to Munchester Rovers

Pour a stiffy

The bad news it was me before my trance ission

The good news you were very generous for a man with such a large bike and small toolkit

We'll always have Istegade, I'll never forget the remolade oozing from your hands and opening a cake vending machine for free with your knob was sheer class

**helge** · 20-11-2021, 02:05 AM

Originally Posted by david44

Sit down calmly and stop deraileuring this fine testament to Munchester Rovers

You started it; the devil inside me felt obliged to follow your lead

Originally Posted by david44

Pour a stiffy

Way ahead of you there.
Ain't a chance in hell, that I'll waste time posting here, if not.....drunk

Originally Posted by david44

The good news you were very generous for a man with such a large bike

Triumph Bonneville T120

Originally Posted by david44

and small toolkit

Not needed; look ^

Originally Posted by david44

We'll always have Istegade

No surrender, mate

**david44** · 20-11-2021, 11:44 AM

Will the 'Ornets beat United as the toffee infused theme song of Z cars fade will Ole be a fair cop of will a priest be needed for ye ole worlde last rites at Vicarage Rd?

For those young shavers to swarthy to recall Z Cars was the number one cops and scousers sho on BBC in the era when it was easy to spot the scallys , black and white ,The Z-Cars theme tune was arranged for commercial release by Fritz Spiegl and Bridget Fry, and performed by John Keating and his Orchestra. The single reached #8 in the Record Retailer chart in April 1962, and as high as #5 in other charts.

The haunting melody makes me smell the coal fire, Bisto and my dad's pipe all normal aromas of the 1960s before condoms there were Ribba Johnny s, no ring pull cans nor smoking bans,my dentist used to smoke on the job Liam McCrann RIP

The Zed reefreed to the ford Zephyrs and Zodiacs fitted with newf angled radios it was Car 54 without the jokes but filled the gap between evening all and the reassuring Jack Warner as Dockson of Dick Green( a seriosu complaint) and the much grittier offset Sweeney.

**Reg Dingle** · 20-11-2021, 03:26 PM

FFS Dave, What's with all these pages of mindless gibberish?

It's nearly as bad as when Hal and Lu used to post on the subject.

**hallelujah** · 20-11-2021, 03:31 PM

It's Saturday; it's OLEgend day!

A true Manchester United legend, adored by the fans, leading the team out again. What dreams are made of!

Watford 8-1 United

**Reg Dingle** · 20-11-2021, 03:52 PM

Originally Posted by malmomike77

Hals back - its Watford today - a tricky visit for the tactical genius. Fred will get a run out, Pogba will demonstrate he's worth the cost of Div one team and Martial will be no where to be seen.

Pogba is out for 2 months and the Bellend has mentioned giving Martial and Van de Beek more playing time.

I see a couple of good hidings today. United spanking Watford and another Salah masterclass

**malmomike77** · 20-11-2021, 03:47 PM

^ Hals back - its Watford today - a tricky visit for the tactical genius. Fred will get a run out, Pogba will demonstrate he's worth the cost of Div one team and Martial will be no where to be seen.

**Reg Dingle** · 20-11-2021, 03:48 PM

One swallow has made a lifetime of summers in the Hal Household.

Is it really legendary to do something just once? Surely thats luck not legend.

Why hasn't Hal given this legend of Cardiff and Norwegian Goblin faced PE teachers his own thread yet?

A nice run of easy fixtures coming up.

Get on with this megathread post haste, you crazed olesexual.

**hallelujah** · 20-11-2021, 04:20 PM

Originally Posted by Reg Dingle

One swallow has made a lifetime of summers in the Hal Household.

Is it really legendary to do something just once? Surely thats luck not legend.

Why hasn't Hal given this legend of Cardiff and Norwegian Goblin faced PE teachers his own thread yet?

A nice run of easy fixtures coming up.

Get on with this megathread post haste, you crazed olesexual.

I'm sick. Lying on the sofa waiting for James Martin to come on and wondering when I'm gonna stop shitting.

I can't do new threads while I'm in recuperation from being Chittied.

**malmomike77** · 20-11-2021, 04:06 PM

The sad thing is Utd will probably get their money back on that useless sack of shite Pogba.

Originally Posted by Reg Dingle

Martial and Van de Beek

and Fred - you'd pay good money to watch King run rings round them today.

**hallelujah** · 20-11-2021, 06:21 PM

Gary Nev on his support for Ole and his "failure" to call for another human being to be sacked in public. Leave that sort of behaviour to the cnuts on the Guardian's sports desk.

'This season has been a shock and they have a horrific week coming up,' he admitted.
'The signing of some very good players adds further condemnation to these recent performances.
'I think United with this squad should challenge for the title.
'But we are in a really bad position and it's heartbreaking to watch Ole.
'For Man United fans who loved him and ex-players who still love him.

'It's not easy commentating on a former team-mate.
'I think Ole not sorting out the compactness of the team earlier was silly. It was a glaring tactical omission.
'I am happy to say that. Not good enough. But I just won't say the other thing. Not about Ole or any manager. I never have.
'I had to decide 11 years ago what type of person and pundit I wanted to be.
'When Arsene Wenger was dying at the end I was critical of Arsenal fans marching against him. There were complaints when I called one of them a muppet.
'As pundits we have to decide whether we are comfortable asking for a fellow human being to be sacked. I feel I am a respectable human being.'

Gary Neville speaks on Man United 'heartbreak' and Ole Gunnar Solskjaer | Daily Mail Online

**cyrille** · 20-11-2021, 07:05 PM

Originally Posted by hallelujah

Gary Nev on his support for Ole and his "failure" to call for another human being to be sacked in public. Leave that sort of behaviour to the cnuts on the Guardian's sports desk.

For the rest of the world...Neville and Keane's utterly spineless performance over the last few weeks has been most amusing.

It's not hard to see why either ... obviously they both foresee an 'ambassadorial' role at the club in their dotage.

**Joe 90** · 20-11-2021, 10:34 PM

**Reg Dingle** · 20-11-2021, 10:38 PM

Originally Posted by hallelujah

A true Manchester United legend, adored by the fans, leading the team out again. What dreams are made of!

A laughing stock of a club, manager and deluded olesexual

**Joe 90** · 20-11-2021, 10:44 PM

**malmomike77** · 20-11-2021, 10:45 PM

Where are the Utd fans? they could have been 3 down by now

**Reg Dingle** · 20-11-2021, 10:49 PM

3? It could easily have been 5 or fukkin 6 nil. They've played Inited off the pitch. United have had 1 shot.

Come on Watford, stick 10 past the kunts

**malmomike77** · 20-11-2021, 10:49 PM

Hal was watching Saturday Kitchen earlier, James Martin cooking steaks. Did a decent Tomahawk - i bet Hal has used his to beat his telly, hope its not rented.

**hallelujah** · 20-11-2021, 10:50 PM

Fucking hell.

It looks like we're just gonna have to settle for a Champions League and FA Cup double this year.

**Joe 90** · 20-11-2021, 10:49 PM

Most of them are sat in their piss stained armchairs calling for help to find the remote control as it's been flung out thee window

**malmomike77** · 20-11-2021, 10:52 PM

^ fuk they need to bottle your optimism

Thread: Manchester Utd

Thread Tools

Display

Hybrid View

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

Posting Permissions