Ask yourself how'd you do it?
What always puzzles me is out of all the ways to end it all no-one seems to take pills. You know, restful day, return the hired DVDs, send the girl back home a few days prior, write the last letter, make out a will and leave a copy with someone, and then lcok the doors. Turn off the phone. Wear your 'want to look nice dead' clothes and finally, take the pills, in bed. Asleep then. Where they'll be finding you. Like when they first found you; all snug and tucked up in bed. Like the professional suicides are doing it.
But no!
They jump from balconies; their last moments hurtling at 30 mph towards the concrete. Or it's a multiple stabbing with an old kitchen blade as you smash up your much hated furniture. All spontaneous. What's on TV? Don't fancy 'American Gangster - again' - I think I'll kill myself! Or it's hanging. Where's me tie? Haven't got one. Leg of me jeans then. Or rather not just hanging but remembering to blame Tops by way of including one of their carriers on your head. Tops or Carrefour? French flag or Watford's colours? No planning then.
Always violent. Never a note. Doesn't anybody write anymore? All the blurb they knock out endlessly on the internet but when it's the most important moment of their death and they've nothing to say. Not even: 'I'm going to make this look like somebody has killed me.' The way it would look if someone were to kill you in your own home and leave you for two days.
And another question: why so few drownings then. All that sea and yet no-one does a Reggie and simply walks out and starts swimming. The reason being that it's all too public, there would be WITNESSES and that people don't commit suicide in Pattaya in the numbers that the Police, other authorities and the newspapers would have us believe.
It's called murder. Usually the motive is robbery. And when it has happened and is witnessed the motive has been a mobile phone or 3 k baht. A row with / over the mia noi.
But any interuption to the flow of tea monies, any alteration from the 'we report where others daren't', any thing that threatens the comfortable veneer of all's well', has to be hidden, quashed or shut down

or simply strangled.
Back to where we started then.