Stick Cheney Emerges from Hole

[Ripley]

Monday, October 11, 2010 at 4:05 PM

A gaunt Dick Cheney is back on the road, vows more appearances

by GottaLaff 16 Comments and 12 Reactions








Oh my, Dickette’s dad looks a little wan, a tad fragile. Of course, that’s understandable. He is, after all, a “walking zombie”. (That was not a joke, that is a direct quote, follow the link.)
He was in my home state of California this weekend strutting all that Cheney charisma in front of 10,000 people at the Bakersfield Business Conference.
Dickette’s mom was with him:

“She’s been my nurse, my negotiator with the medical community,” her husband said, “and in return for all of that great help she’s given me, today I’ve agreed to let her interview me.”

So he needs a negotiator to deal with the medical community, does he?
Would that be the same medical community that he accessed in order to save his life, unlike so many of his “fellow Americans”? Did he have to pay a dime for that? And what kind of negotiating did they engage in exactly? How much air time to devote to Big Insurance? How to assure his buddies that Citizens United has taken all the risk out of special interests buying elections?
He then went on to say his proudest accomplishment was preventing another terrorist attack. That’s notable for two reasons: 1) He actually admitted at least one an attack happened on his watch (Psst! Rudy!) , and 2) he lied about there not being another attack.
Yep, he’s nearly back to normal.
H/t: [at]BleuZ00m

[BillyBobThai]

He and GW did more good for the country than Obamie will ever be able to do.

Go hug a tree you CA libbie.

[Ripley]

No he did Halliburton , KBR and Carlyle more good.

And GW.... Oh yes we're all in fine shape because of his presidency.

Faux News Lies to you BB . It manipulates your malleable brain into thinking it's OK to kill people for oil, to continue reckless policies that enrich war mongers..
and you paid for it , but not me
I stopped paying taxes to the US soon after the occupation of Iraq .

[sabang]

He and GW did more good for the country than Obamie will ever be able to do.

Pretty impressive accomplishments.

Turning the US from the worlds biggest creditor to the worlds biggest debtor in eight years.
From the worlds largest government surplus to the worlds largest government deficit.
And of course, having already accomplished this, then bow out with a mega financial crisis. Spectacular.
The average American got poorer during this period too- which is obviously the average amerkins fault.
May as well not sweat the small stuff- whats a botched $1 trillion dollar invasion here and there, just put it on the tab for the next government to work out how to pay off.

'Mission accomplished' all right.

[Ripley]

^
" Mission Accomplished "was Grover's dream of drowning the federal govt in a bathtub.

Jaysus , now they want to stop public schools.

[Pol the Pot]

Is he pursueing public office? Looks very fragile now.

[Ripley]

No , he is utterly unelectable

[StrontiumDog]

Dick Cheney - Dickipedia - A Wiki of Dicks

Dick Cheney

From Dickipedia - A Wiki of Dicks



Richard Bruce Cheney (born January 30, 1941) is a former United States Congressman, Secretary of Defense, the 46th Vice President of the United States and a dick. He also served as White House Chief of Staff, and in the private sector was the Chairman and Chief Executive Officer of Halliburton Energy Services. Every decision he has ever made has been wrong.

Early life and family

Cheney was born in Lincoln, Nebraska, to Richard Herbert Cheney and Marjorie Dickey (sic). His family later moved to Wyoming. In 1959, he matriculated to Yale University, where it was thought to be impossible to flunk out. After flunking out, Cheney returned to Wyoming in 1960. He ended up graduating from the University of Wyoming at the age of twenty-four, the perfect age for a young black man to serve his country in the army.

In 1964, Cheney married Lynne Vincent, his high school sweetheart. Mrs. Cheney would go on to become an accomplished dick in her own right, serving as the Chair of the National Endowment for the Humanities, a senior fellow at the American Enterprise Institute, and a writer of filthy pulp novels about lesbian sex and rape. The Cheneys have two daughters, Elizabeth and Mary, also dicks. Mary Cheney is an attractive though somewhat tomboy-ish femme lesbian. Her partner, Heather Poe, looks a bit like Dad. Mary Cheney and Heather Poe have one child.

Cheney and the draft

Cheney is sub-species of dick known as the "Chicken Hawk,” which is a person who publicly supports a war but is too much of a pussy to fight in it himself. There is a scene in the movie "Office Space" when one of the characters, Michael Bolton, is sitting in his fancy car listening to hardcore gangsta rap, and then the black guy pulls up next to him, and he rolls the window up. A chickenhawk is this sort of person.

In 1963, with the draft board ramping up, Cheney enrolled in Casper Community College (one of the finest institutions of higher-learning in Southwest Casper), and received his first student deferment. Later that year, he got his second student deferment. In August of 1964, Congress passed the Gulf of Tonkin resolution, escalating American military involvement. Twenty-two days later, Dick married his wife, and a few months later received his third deferment. In July, 1965, President Johnson announced he would double the number of draftees. Cheney moved quickly, entered graduate school that year, and received his fourth student deferment. This was quite a sacrifice, as grad school is known to be extremely boring. Cheney received a “hardship exemption" in 1966 when he and his wife conceived their first child. By the next year, he was no longer eligible for the draft. It had been a long process, but Cheney learned a valuable lesson: if you get in a jam, you can usually get out of it by fucking somebody.

Political career

Cheney’s career is notable for having taken place almost entirely within a "dick bubble." He began his career as in intern for Richard Nixon and was campaign manager in 1976 for Gerald Ford -- a campaign that managed to lose a governor of Georgia. Dick was then elected to the House, where he served until 1989. Part of this service included voting against making the birthday of Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. a holiday, voting against calling on South Africa to release Nelson Mandela, and voting against the creation of the Department of Education -- the kind of congressman that would be produced if George Wallace and Barry Goldwater had a child who inherited the worst of each and then grew up to be a congressman and also lost his hair.

In 1989 Cheney became Secretary of Defense for President George H.W. Bush. In defending the decision not to take Baghdad and topple Saddam Hussein at the time, he said:

“I don't think you could have done all of that without significant additional U.S. casualties...And the question in my mind is, how many additional American casualties is Saddam worth? And the answer is, not that damned many.”

This is known as “irony.”

In 1995, Cheney decided he’d given enough to his country and thought it was about time to do something for himself. For the next five years, he served as CEO of Halliburton, one of the top companies in the world for anyone looking for military equipment and willing to pay three to five times above retail.

In the spring of 2000, Cheney was put in charge of George W. Bush’s Vice Presidential search committee. Like all great romantic comedies, the dick Bush was looking for to fill out the ticket turned out to be right under his nose all along. If Bush was going to be the worst President in United States history, he would need a partner ready to step in and carry on that tradition if something should happen to him.

Vice President

Immediately following the 9/11 attacks, Cheney was kept in out of the public eye in an undisclosed location, partly for security reasons and partly because it was thought that America had been through enough already. Some (Lynn Cheney) have been quoted as saying that Cheney has a charming side. This was on display in June of 2004 when, while walking by Senator Patrick Leahy in the Capital, he said “go fuck yourself.”

Cheney is also known as the world’s biggest supporter of the Iraq War. And it is certainly true that the consistency of his acumen and judgment about the war have been unequaled. Most famously, on May 31, 2005, he claimed that the insurgency in Iraq was “in it’s last throes.” Roughly 2000 U.S. troops have been killed since then.

In 2006, Cheney shot his 78-year-old friend in the face while quail hunting -- a practice some call "an accident" and others call "good clean fun." The firearm used was a “Perazzi” shotgun, an expensive model from Italy considered “gay” by many in the shotgun community. Cheney's friend, Harry Whittington suffered a minor heart-attack, though he survived. Cheney announced that he “accepted full responsibility,” which meant announcing that he “accepted full responsibility.”

On October 28, 2005, Lewis “Scooter” Libby, Dick’s Chief of Staff, was indicted for obstruction of justice in the Valerie Plame investigation. After being sentenced to 30 months in prison, in July of 2007, President Bush commuted Lewis “Scooter” Libby's sentence. It is commonly assumed Cheney was behind this decision. The move outraged many, including, no doubt, several inmates who were probably looking forward to getting know a nice, fit, well-kept new inmate who hadn’t let his body go.

With the really fun part of war in Iraq winding down, in May 2007 Cheney gave a speech warning Iran about its nuclear program. Many took this to be setting the stage for a war with Iran, this one even possibly involving nuclear weapons. This alarmed many people, even those in the dick community. One theory about why Cheney would care so little about nuclear war and the casualties it would cause is because, in fact, Cheney actually died several years ago, and is just too big of a dick to leave, instead simply willing his body to carry on through sheer dick will.

Post-vice-presidency

While generally former Presidents and Vice-Presidents have nobly decided to step back from the public eye, particularly when it comes to being critical of the next administration, Dick Cheney has little history of being even moderately scrupulous, much less noble.

As of summer 2009, Cheney has become Matthew McConaughey's character from Dazed and Confused who still hangs around his high school because none of his actual peers want to hang out with him. That is, minus the good looks, hair, and general mobility.

Regularly, Cheney spoke out in press conferences refuting President Obama's policies on torture and national security, going so far as to criticize the Iraqi troop withdrawal that occurred at the precise time his own previous administration had planned.

In many countries, when an elderly person has completely lost parts of their memory, constantly needs attention to survive, and accidentally shoots someone, they are committed to some kind of assisted living facility. In the United States, they are given more cable news airtime.

As of March 2009, Cheney's approval ratings were at 30% approval and 63% disapproval. Currently, Cheney is no longer employed by the Government or engaged in any policymaking, meaning that over 60% of Americans actually disapprove of his job of doing nothing.

[Boon Mee]

^
And yer point is........?

[StrontiumDog]

It's supposed to be a bit of mild humour....

Apparently you lack a sense of one....

"Every decision he has ever made has been wrong."

You aren't related to Cheney by any chance?

[steevee]

He and GW did more good for the country than Obamie will ever be able to do.

Go hug a tree you CA libbie.

Surely that's a typo and you mean GH, since Daddy and Dickie were pulling the strings that GW danced to.

[robuzo]

Is he pursueing public office? Looks very fragile now.

The US being what it is nowadays they are probably having a hard time finding enough virgins to supply the blood to keep him walking around, let alone enough to give him the energy to campaign. Not that he has to campaign much, since he mostly just gets appointed or appoints himself to positions.

[Boon Mee]

Cheney Says Barack Obama Has 'Learned From Experience' That Bush Policies Were Right.




CHENEY: "He's learned that what we did was far more appropriate than he ever gave us credit for while he was a candidate"

thehill

President Obama has “learned from experience” that some of the Bush administration’s decisions on terrorism issues were necessary, according to former Vice President Dick Cheney.

In his first interview since undergoing major heart surgery last July, Cheney said he thinks Obama has been forced to rethink some of his national security positions now that he sits in the Oval Office.

"I think he's learned that what we did was far more appropriate than he ever gave us credit for while he was a candidate. So I think he's learned from experience. And part of that experience was the Democrats having a terrible showing last election."

Cheney also asserted that Obama has learned that the prison at Guantanamo Bay simply cannot be closed, despite the promises he made while campaigning for the White House.

"I think he's learned that he's not going to be able to close Guantanamo," Cheney said. "That it's — if you didn't have it, you'd have to create one like that. You've got to have some place to put terrorists who are combatants who are bound and determined to try to kill Americans."

Well, he is, after all, just an empty-suit so-called "community organizer" with no experience...

[Boon Mee]

I'm sure some of y'all will want to send him a 'Get Well' card or two?

"Former Vice President Dick Cheney received a heart transplant on Saturday, his office announced.

A statement from the former vice president's office said the 71-year-old is now recovering in the intensive care unit of Inova Fairfax Hospital in Falls Church, Va., outside Washington.

The statement said Cheney had been on the transplant list for 20 months and did not know the identity of the donor.

"Although the former vice president and his family do not know the identity of the donor, they will be forever grateful for this lifesaving gift," the statement read."

Dick Cheney receives heart transplant - Political Hotsheet - CBS News

Godspeed Dick!

[Little Chuchok]

^
And yer point is........?

He's a c unt?

I've never voted left in my life and never will,but there is something about this man that gives me the wilt. Chicken-hawk springs to mind....

[aging one]

Lets hope the heart does not reject him.

[Boon Mee]

^
Good one!

Really thought some invective of a stronger variety would appear thus far. Folks might have forgotten poor maligned Dick by now I guess...

[Begbie]

Should a person of such advanced age be given a new heart when there are many much younger candidates? Oh I forgot he's got a lot of money.

[Boon Mee]

^
A man of his stature who has given so much for his country? Can't begrudge the guy can we?

[Begbie]

What stature? He's spent his entire career as a parasite lobbyist for various companies. The pinnacle of his achievement was to be the brains behind most of the fuck ups perpetrated by the Bush clique. Classic example of "crime does pay".

[S Landreth]

Lets hope the heart does not reject him.

Recipient survival rates vary based on a number of factors. For example, in the U.S. the overall survival rate is nearly 90 percent after one year and 74 percent after five years.

mayo: Heart transplant: Results - MayoClinic.com

[BaitongBoy]

the overall survival rate is nearly 90 percent after one year and 74 percent after five years.

Surviving until when?...

[sabang]

Cheney had been on the transplant list for 20 months and did not know the identity of the donor.

The still beating heart of a farm fresh Iraqi? Anyway, he's had the transplant and if he is not lying about the fact that he has absolutely no knowledge of whom the donor might be (and I am pretty sure the donor had absolutely no knowledge of whom he might be giving his organ to), than at last he will realise that within all humankind there is a heart. Even if a borrowed one.

[Boon Mee]

While Dick Cheney was recovering from his heart transplant in the intensive care unit of Inova Fairfax Hospital in Falls Church, Va. Saturday, Twitter exploded with hate and ill wishes for the former vice president. Lovely folks...

“Whoever donated their heart to dick cheney: fuck you,” tweeted @yokelesy.

“Cheney’s black soul keeps rotting out his heart. Fuck that bitch,” @SolidGlo waxed poetic.

“Why in the contumacious fuck are we wasting a perfectly good heart on dick cheney?” tweeted @mr_senor_pete

Another offered a different if similar perspective, expressing happiness for Cheney’s transplant — so that Cheney could one day meet his demise in a fire.

“I’m glad Cheney survived his heart transplant because I’ve always wanted him to die in a horrible fire,” @Jedimasterbator tweeted.

Dick Cheney | Heart transplant | Liberals | The Daily Caller

[Boon Mee]

Thought y'all would like an update on how 'ol Dick was doing:

Cheney doing ‘exceedingly well’ after heart transplant.

Cheney, helped for many months by a mechanical heart, is “terrific” after transplant - The Washington Post