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  1. Replies
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    don't know if I've mentioned it already, but 1Q...

    don't know if I've mentioned it already, but 1Q 84 by Murakami is ace
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    #don't know if it's been mentioned, but the...

    #don't know if it's been mentioned, but the Contortionists Handbook is worth dabble
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    I had a problem with dishwasher, it started...

    I had a problem with dishwasher, it started making a whining noise, then it stopped working, so I made her move back to her mums house.
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    currently ploughing through The Naked Lunch,...

    currently ploughing through The Naked Lunch, William Buroughs.
    Just finished Nice Mr Nasty by Joseph King, easy enough truish tale of a drug smuggler, and also This thing of Darkness by Harry...
  5. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: I've just painted myself head to toe in creosote,...

    I've just painted myself head to toe in creosote, it's not often I treat myself
  6. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: Just been for a prostate check, as I bent over I...

    Just been for a prostate check, as I bent over I asked the doctor "Where should I put my trousers"
    "Over there next to mine," isn't the answer I was hoping for
  7. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: You're the only guy I know, went for a prostate...

    You're the only guy I know, went for a prostate check and asked for second opinion
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    better late than never

    better late than never
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    Copper gone mad with gun in Samui

    Two dead, five injured in Samui pub shoot out - Samui Times

    That article says a copper's gone crackers and shot into a crowd of other copperson a night out in Chaweng.

    Whats the world coming...
  10. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: I was walking past the mental hospital the other...

    I was walking past the mental hospital the other day and I could hear the patients shouting

    13..13..13..13..13

    I wondered what the fuck was going on, the fence was too high to look over but I...
  11. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: I met this American bird and asked her what her...

    I met this American bird and asked her what her name was

    She said "Chantelle"

    Suit yourself love, I only asked
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    A mate of mine wrote a book called "The Aeroplane...

    A mate of mine wrote a book called "The Aeroplane with no wings", do you think it'll take off ?
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    if we're talking Ballard, Concrete Island is...

    if we're talking Ballard, Concrete Island is worth a dabble
  14. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: I used to be into sadism, bestiality and...

    I used to be into sadism, bestiality and necrophilia, but I quit because I was flogging a dead horse.
  15. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat ? ...

    What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat ?

    The wheelchair.
  16. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: There was a Scottish bloke on the bus this...

    There was a Scottish bloke on the bus this morning, sat there listening to his Och Aye Pod
  17. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    547,250

    Sticky: Scientists have been experimenting with injecting...

    Scientists have been experimenting with injecting embryo's with Marmite.

    A woman gave birth to twiglets
  18. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: stolen from the late great Ronnie Corbett, ...

    stolen from the late great Ronnie Corbett,

    "We'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed a Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame."
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    the Wigan Blackpool one tomorrow is us champions...

    the Wigan Blackpool one tomorrow is us champions and them down up for grabs
  20. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: I went to the doctors for my offshore medical...

    I went to the doctors for my offshore medical yesterday, and I told him I may not pass my hearing test because of years of navy gunfire.
    "Can you describe the symptoms?" said the doc,
    "Well,...
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    top of the league with 2 games to go

    top of the league with 2 games to go
  22. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: A Sesna light aircraft crashed on a cemetry just...

    A Sesna light aircraft crashed on a cemetry just south of Dublin the other night.

    Rescue workers have already recovered the bodies of 6453 passengers
  23. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: Today we comemorate the man from Yorkhire who...

    Today we comemorate the man from Yorkhire who revolutionised road safety by inventing the Cats Eye.

    If the cat had been facing the other way he'd have invented the pencil sharpner
  24. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: Some good came of it then

    Some good came of it then
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    nineteen games unbeaten

    nineteen games unbeaten
  26. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: Africa there's fucking millions of them.

    Africa there's fucking millions of them.
  27. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: The NYPD have said they'll never forget 9/11,...

    The NYPD have said they'll never forget 9/11, you'd hope so as well with it being their phone number :sorry1:
  28. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: A quick English joke here. What do you get if...

    A quick English joke here.

    What do you get if you cross the Queen and Prince Philip ?

    Killed in a tunnel
  29. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: What's pink and wrinkly and hangs out your...

    What's pink and wrinkly and hangs out your underpants ?


    Your grandma, when she's pegging them to the washing line
  30. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: Brilliant !

    Brilliant !
  31. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: What's brown and sounds like a bell ? Dung !

    What's brown and sounds like a bell ?

    Dung !
  32. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: I've just passed my cheerleading exam, I went...

    I've just passed my cheerleading exam, I went into the classrom and shouted "Give me an A" and they did
  33. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: My grandma was telling me that my grandpa would...

    My grandma was telling me that my grandpa would always leave his door open, that's why the submarine sunk
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    What job do you do ? I've just had an amble...

    What job do you do ?

    I've just had an amble through Wind/Pinball by Haruki Murakami, not one of his epics but still enjoyable.
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    Norwich Liverpool was a game and a half, even for...

    Norwich Liverpool was a game and a half, even for neutrals
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    Cheeky home win against Gillingham last night...

    Cheeky home win against Gillingham last night with a last minute goal sealing it, don't want to antagonize my from Bolton though so keeping quiet about it
  37. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever...

    I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
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    Well it's saTURDay and the Latics are at...

    Well it's saTURDay and the Latics are at sCUNThorpe, no ticket but I've got the itch, might see if a pay gate is available.
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    I'd been on the edge of my seat all week for...

    I'd been on the edge of my seat all week for 'tics v Sheff Utd, called off due to flooded pitch
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    last time I was in Fortune there wasn't much...

    last time I was in Fortune there wasn't much there, anyone know about Pantip Bangkapi, its software I'm after ?
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    Panthip Plaza

    I've not been in BKK for 18 months or so but I've been told that Panthip Plaza has become a hotel, have I been mislead ? If not is there a replacement ?

    Thanks in advance
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    Any spare ?

    Any spare ?
  43. Thread: Quick Jokes

    by SiLeakHunt
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    Sticky: in he news the other day a bloke died of a...

    in he news the other day a bloke died of a coronary incident at the curry house, they said he had a dodgy tikka
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    I wouldn't mind the parachute payment i they get...

    I wouldn't mind the parachute payment i they get relegated
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    and now its 3 :(, top of the table clash hard one...

    and now its 3 :(, top of the table clash hard one to call
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    the 'tics are 2:0 up with only injury time left,...

    the 'tics are 2:0 up with only injury time left, when I go they loose when I sit at home they win
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    the beautiful Latics are at Barnsley today, see...

    the beautiful Latics are at Barnsley today, see wht that delight throws up
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    you can if you want

    you can if you want
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    Mourhino is no longer a premiership manager

    Mourhino is no longer a premiership manager
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    I'm reading a book about anti gravity, it's...

    I'm reading a book about anti gravity, it's impossible to put down
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