PART ONE
So I start off at Don Muang railway station, note the old lady with the devilish eyes? ..There were lots of Thai people there milling about aimlessly and it was opposite my old friend the old airport which bought back fond memories.
In the buffet car of the train there was this black woman from New York who I fancied but by the time I joined them the table was full and they were talking to some fat people opposite and watching a Thai boy doing the Macarena. I was stuck with some Thai's who couldn't speak English or read what it said on my brown T-Shirt and kept saying 'cheese' and clinking my glass every foking 10 seconds. Typical of my luck, the sexy black chick had gone for a piss in the bogs when I stood up and turned around to get the pic.
Speaking of the bogs, it's the one unpleasant thing about the train journey and I don't envy women who have to squat to take a leak.
Touch wood I have yet to evacuate my bowels on a train.
The bogs also stink of amonia and as I was unfortunate enough to be in an aircon car the only place I could get a nice view was standing up to have a wee looking at the beautiful dusk out of the little window.
Bedtime, I was not very happy because it was cold and I only had a thin blanket and the brown backpacker style T-Shirt that the Thai's in the buffet car were unable to read. Speaking of reading, in my hand is the book Thick Face Black Heart by Chin Ning Chu, Asias bestest business woman.
This is the site that greets me in the morning, look at the window - it is sealed shut so there is no breeze and there is frost on the window because it is so cold I am sneezing and my bungle is reduced to the size of an acorn.
As the thaw sets in, the train staff who are always nice and everything, start to transform the beds back to seats.
Twelve hours or so since I departed DM, we have arrived in Nong Khai.
I didn't get any photos at the border because it's boring, but I did use a bathroom. There was a lady there with a box that said 5 bath on it, she didn't see me leave or enter and I didn't see any baths inside, not that I would have had time for one. There wasn't any hot water either, just lots of these horrible, mysterious and fearless little ugly flies that I have always seen in Thailand but never mentioned before. they are so crap, they don't do anything but sit on the walls doing fuck all.
I found them a bit arrogant, just sitting there and not even fearing me - touch one and they just relocate. They were starting to piss me off with the indifferent attitude so I got them with the bum gun.
Ok, at last a photo of Laos, this is Vientienes answer to the Arc De Triumph, I don't know what it's there for or anything. I asked the tuk tuk driver, you know - trying to show an interest in their culture and everything but he just laughed all nervous like. I guess he didn't understand what I was saying, but I tried.
Finaly I arrived at my intended destination - central Vientiene. This isn't a great picture because I just caught the tail end of the presidents convoy. he was on his way to a meeting or something and needed twelve identical cars, a police convoy and two 4X4's to get there. I don't see why, Laos is as harmless as pecan pie - nobody knows what he looks like anyway.
More later, I have things to do today.














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