Thread: Lifes a bitch.

A nurse walks into a bank totally exhausted after a 20 hour shift. Preparing to write a check, she pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse and tries to write with it. She looks at the flabbergasted teller and without missing a beat says:"Well, that's great.... that's really great... some asshole's got my pen."
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A ninety year old man lived in a rest home and got a weekend pass. He stopped in his favorite bar and sat at the end and ordered a drink. He noticed a seventy year old woman at the other end of the bar and he told the bartender to buy the lovely young lady a drink. As the evening progressed, the old man joined the lady and they went to her apartment, where they got it on. Four days later, the old man noticed that he was developing a drip, and he headed for the rest home doctor. After careful examination the doctor asked the old man if he had engaged in sex recently.The old man said, "Sure!" The doctor asked if he could remember who the woman was and where she lived."Sure, why?" "Well you'd better get over there, you're about to cum!"

^ Hehehe...

A man of western origin and his Asian girlfriend are lying in bed, totally exhausted after a marathon session, after a few minutes she begins to stroke his nether regions, he asks her if she wants him again so soon and she replies......

"no it's ok, I'm just admiring it, I really miss mine"



(an oldie, but a goodie)