Swingathon festival frivolities in the UK

**Joe 90** · 21-07-2024, 11:07 PM

Quiet Lincolnshire village braces itself for four-day Swingathon sex festival as one thousand revellers descend for event as local families fear 'screaming and moaning' will keep them awake

Quiet Lincolnshire village braces itself for four-day Swingathon sex festival as one thousand revellers descend for event as local families fear 'screaming and moaning' will keep them awake | Daily Mail Online

Irate residents have complained to police about 'screaming and moaning' coming from the countryside site keeping them up at night in previous years.
And this year's X-rated festival is Swingathon's biggest yet and features 'play tents', pole dancing, hot tubs, foam parties, mobile dungeons - and butt-plug bingo.
One local, who did not want to be named, said: 'I heard about the noise complaints previously and its not the sounds you want to hear when you're trying to sleep.'

Swingathon festival frivolities in the UK-screenshot_20240721_170101_facebook-jpg

Swingathon festival frivolities in the UK-screenshot_20240721_170101_facebook-jpg

Swingathon festival frivolities in the UK-screenshot_20240721_170051_facebook-jpg

Swingathon festival frivolities in the UK-screenshot_20240721_170045_facebook-jpg

Swingathon festival frivolities in the UK-screenshot_20240721_170040_facebook-jpg

**david44** · 22-07-2024, 12:34 AM

Which one are you CCC?

**Joe 90** · 22-07-2024, 01:52 AM

Originally Posted by david44

Which one are you CCC?

Check out Mendys relection in the tractor glass.

I did wonder why he was going to the East of England

**Reg Dingle** · 22-07-2024, 03:50 AM

^ To get his rocks off

**Joe 90** · 22-07-2024, 03:53 AM

**Mendip** · 22-07-2024, 04:30 AM

^ WTF is wrong with you people?

Although I must admit, if forced, I guess I could do some swinging with that girl in the santa outfit.

**DrWilly** · 22-07-2024, 07:27 AM

Originally Posted by Mendip

^ WTF is wrong with you people?

Although I must admit, if forced, I guess I could do some swinging with that girl in the santa outfit.

that’d just be fucking. If you really want to be swinging you need that guy tickling your bolloxks at the same time.

**MarilynMonroe** · 22-07-2024, 11:37 AM

Go for it , Joe!

**KWAN** · 22-07-2024, 12:17 PM

'Readers Wives' on Tour !

**cyrille** · 22-07-2024, 05:47 PM

Cold flesh the colour of potaters
Nipples poke through holes in leatherette
They seem to be saying,
In their fashion,
'I'm freezin' Charlie, 'ave ya finished yet?'

**david44** · 22-07-2024, 08:34 PM

Originally Posted by cyrille

Cold flesh the colour of potaters
Nipples poke through holes in leatherette
They seem to be saying,
In their fashion,
'I'm freezin' Charlie, 'ave ya finished yet?'

Splendid a hemi-haiku from the Bard of Ban Por-Spelling

Tired of EIA CNN dogging and porn?
Are your fave Playboy pages sticky or torn?
Men who stare at dogs may scorn or mock
Limp Willy of BLD's beer O'Cock
Join ChittyChitty's Bangbang round the horn

**Edmond** · 23-07-2024, 04:08 PM

To Lincolnshire Mendy did spin,
For cheese and a bit of a swing
He met up with Dill
who gave him a pill
But his thing stayed as thin as a pin.

**david44** · 23-07-2024, 04:17 PM

There was a young shaver called Eddy
Whose 2011 condom was ever ready
What was quite funny
Unlike a durexcell Bunny
He needed erb Tea to be rock steady

**Mendip** · 23-07-2024, 04:27 PM

Ol' Ed whose as short as an elf
Got bored of his silly car shelf
So he went for a swing
But had no partner to bring
So he ended up wanking himself!

**Edmond** · 23-07-2024, 04:30 PM

Originally Posted by Mendip

Ol' Ed whose as short as an elf
Got bored of his silly car shelf
So he went for a swing
But had no partner to bring
So he ended up wanking himself!

The Maestro shows up.

**DrWilly** · 23-07-2024, 08:05 PM

Greens owed.

**MarilynMonroe** · 23-07-2024, 08:09 PM

Good stuff!

**Edmond** · 23-07-2024, 08:23 PM

There was an ol' girl called MM
Not a rock, but more of a gem
She'd swing through the trees
with nothing but ease,
then land on Joe90's *ahem*

**Joe 90** · 23-07-2024, 11:25 PM

Many people indulge despite the dangers
In quickies even with complete strangers
Well it was during such an act of fornication
That he hesitated after achieving penetration
“Miss I would not have entered the vicinity
Had I been made aware of your virginity”
“Mr. if I had thought you would be mistaken
And that as a virgin I would have been taken”
“Then before we indulged in carnal delights
I would have taken off my bloody tights”

**MarilynMonroe** · 24-07-2024, 04:10 AM

^^*knees* !

Very good, Eddie! lol.

^lol, those darn bloody tights. Talented peeps around here.

---

There was an ol' dog named Chits
Who was always drinkin’ shit
He drank gut brandy
And became randy
Drove away in his fanny magnet !

**Joe 90** · 24-07-2024, 06:58 AM

Tbf that doesn't rhyme

But, I get your point

**Edmond** · 24-07-2024, 10:30 AM

Originally Posted by MarilynMonroe

Talented peeps around here.

They say C+P is a gift
for those that are into a thrift
But for those in the know
It's just a shit-show
And really a waste of bandwidth

**DrWilly** · 24-07-2024, 10:39 AM

Originally Posted by Joe 90

Tbf that doesn't rhyme

But, I get your point

At least she didn’t plagiarize hers.

Source: Quickies - a poem by Biggus - All Poetry

**Joe 90** · 24-07-2024, 12:39 PM

There is a twat called Willy,
Who really was quite silly.
His Avatar was a Monkey,
But really should have been a donkey.

**DrWilly** · 24-07-2024, 12:54 PM

Originally Posted by Joe 90

There is a twat called Willy,
Who really was quite silly.
His Avatar was a Monkey,
But really should have been a donkey.

Originally Posted by Joe 90

Many people indulge despite the dangers
In quickies even with complete strangers
Well it was during such an act of fornication
That he hesitated after achieving penetration
“Miss I would not have entered the vicinity
Had I been made aware of your virginity”
“Mr. if I had thought you would be mistaken
And that as a virgin I would have been taken”
“Then before we indulged in carnal delights
I would have taken off my bloody tights”

Hardly any difference in the writing really. 'tis a wonder anyone could spot you had plagarised, again.

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