The Highly Almighty and powerful Great Wizard is Pattaya is back, to either put a smile on your eyes or angry steam from your ears.
Over the years various forms of local, national and international media have come and gone. I am always more than happy to help them with their filming / articles. Unfortunatly it does NOT make me MORE famous. It is more a case of them 'jumping on my bandwagon' to sell their papers / fill their News features. But i do usually get reasonably good photos etc as souveniers.
I am Pattaya's NUMBER ONE expat public figure, [and dont you forget it] and so i am almost constantly in the media, most of the time without me even knowing about it untill months later, when someone casually says "I saw you on..." or "i read about you in....."
My almost daily Pattaya local show has made me famous locally. NOW i am looking for World domination 'Glitterman Mayor', 'Glitterman Primeminister / presedent' etc etc. Spielberg if you are reading this then how about 'Glitterman the movie'. I have been in a few blockbusters myself, so i will play the lead role. See if Victor Meldue [from keeping up apearances, "i dont belieeeeve it"] is available to head the cast of the forums 'Grumpy Mens Club'
Just think of the market value of movie spinoff toys [and also the suddenly strange appearance of naked Osteriches in Zoo's]
As i am on the subject of 'Media' i thought i would include this golden oldie article i wrote to help advertise my last big media coverage.....................
The Almighty and Powerfull, Wild and Wacky Great Wizard of Pattaya is back, with some new news about a newspapers news.
'PATTAYA PEOPLE WEEKLY', The very same newspaper that crowned me with the great everlasting title of THE GOLDEN MAN back in late 2008 are featuring me again! This time with a front cover [quite rightly] and center spread story in their newspaper suppliment; 'LIFESTYLE'. With ultra rare never seen before photos and revelations about me and my bicycle creation.
Its released today, but you had better hurry as i am expecting a sell out very quickly. When this happens do not be disapointed, do not be disheartened, instead fly on your moped, overtaking even the speeding, lane weaving pitza delivery mopeds [the ones with the pitza box on the back with a flag on it, who use the roads as a race track, and will soon find their executed head in that box if i ever catch up with them on my royal chariot] and go to the Pattaya People office on soi Day and night off south Pattaya road and purchase your Pattaya People newspaper there.
Buy 2 copies, one for each eye, then you can read it in stereo, and view the photos in a sort of makeshift 3D effect. Understandably you will be determined to frame it, i recomend an ornate gold leaf gilded frame. The G.M.C. [Grumpy Mens Club] in this forum may have a strong desire to stick a copy on the wall, and use it as a dartboard, if so, aim for the bullseye the tyres......i dont fancy one in my eye! Or give it to your 'rentable lady' as a valentines gift, instead of the usual flowers [which she has already secretly recieved from 10 other men today] They may not thank you for being a 'walking free A.T.M.' but they will certainly thankyou when they recieve that magazine of me....you can get it back later, you will find it hidden under her pillow!!!
Cherish your copy, dont crease the pages, for in the future it will become highly collectable and mint condition copies of this edition of 'Lifestyle' magazine will change hands for VERY large sums of money. And for this week only i will stop during my show to sighn copies.....wow!.....imagine how much it will be worth then!..... Christies and Sothebys auctioneers.....prepare yourselves!!!!
You know...... i have been thinking........not a single drop of alcohol for 20 years is a loooooong time, maybe its time for a change, and rebel against something else instead, i am an extreamist soooooo........;
.........And so the Golden Glitterman, the last hope for mankind, stopped his royal chariot outside a crowded beer bar, got off, and with an empy bottle of beer in one hand and a very crumpled copy of 'Lifestyle' magazine in the other, swayed and staggered into the bar. Then climbed up on to the girls pole dancing stage, and attempted to dance, gold coat and all, singing "this'll be the day that i die", and falling backwards in a sort of cruisifix pose straight onto the angry customers. Accompanied by sounds of falling breaking glass and then angry men with big raised fists saying "did ya just spill me pint?"
........And so from that day on the Golden Glitterman, Pattaya's fallen angel and tarnished Golden hero traded his city stage for the girls pole dancing stage, recieving free food of rotten tomatoes and eggs and making headlines of 'All that Glitters is not gold'.
Ha Ha only joking.....no no really.
the royal Glitterman hath spoken and joken.