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  1. #1

    R.I.P.


    dirtydog's Avatar
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    The Suns Darwin Awards

    THE Darwin Awards are probably the least coveted trophies in the world. But you don’t hear recipients complaining . . . because it is most likely they are DEAD. Darwins are handed out to folk who accidentally kill or seriously injure themselves in unbelievably stupid ways.
    The deaths are documented by fans of cult site Darwin Awards which commemorates “those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it.”
    CAROLINE IGGULDEN looks at some of the weird deaths . . .

    Bright spark

    Fatal ... explosion EMPLOYEES at a Texas warehouse noticed a smell of gas. The building was evacuated and two engineers went in to trace the leak.
    But because it was too dark, one reached into his pocket for a cigarette lighter to shed some light.

    The warehouse exploded, sending debris three miles away. Nothing was found of the men but the lighter was untouched by the explosion.

    Pepper plummets A MEXICAN jail guard proved that peeping never pays when he died while trying to get an eyeful of an inmate’s conjugal visit.
    Raul Zarate Diaz was watching the lag and his wife from the roof of the prison when he tripped over an air vent. He crashed through a skylight and fell 23 feet to land beside the bed where the couple were enjoying their intimate moment.

    Pint of milk ... and petrol

    Deadly cocktail A YOUNG Canadian, searching for a way of getting drunk cheaply, mixed some petrol with his milk.

    The concoction made him terribly ill and he was sick in the fireplace at his home. The resulting explosion and fire burned down his house, killing both him and his sister.

    Freeway dangler TWO Seattle drunks were on a bridge 40ft above a motorway at 2.45am when they decided it would be a great place for a trial of strength. Whoever could dangle from the bridge the longest would win.
    Sadly, the winner was too tired from his victory to climb back up, despite help from his friend. The unidentified champion fell smack into traffic below and died.

    Bad bungee
    FASTFOOD worker Eric Barcia died when he attempted to bungee jump off a 70ft railway bridge.
    Cops in Fairfax County, Virginia, were called when Barcia hit the pavement below.

    Police spokesman Warren Carmichael said: “The length of the elastic cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the bridge and the ground.”

    Belt up STUDENT Derek Kieper, 21, died in a car crash when not wearing a seat belt – just weeks after he had written a damning article in his local paper about new seatbelt laws being introduced in Nebraska.
    His article said: “If I want to be the jerk that flirts with death and rides around with my seat belt off, I should be able to.” Two belted passengers in the car escaped with minor injuries.


    Snakebite ball

    Let's play catch ... the snake
    A MAN in Alabama died after being bitten several times by a rattlesnake.
    It seems that he and a friend were playing a game of catch. But instead of a ball they used the deadly serpent.
    The friend recovered after emergency hospital treatment.

    Macho man
    POLISH farmer Krystof Azninski, 30, had been drinking with friends when it was suggested they strip naked and play some “men’s games.”

    At first they just hit each other over the head with frozen turnips, then one man grabbed a chainsaw and cut off the end of his foot.
    Not to be outdone, Azninski got the saw and shouting: “Watch this then,” swung at his neck and chopped off his own head.

    What a pa-lava BRIGHT spark Philip Quinn’s new lava lamp failed to light up – so he placed it on his kitchen stove to warm.
    The lamp, which was supposed to get no warmer than a 40-watt bulb, exploded – spraying him with glass.

    One shard pierced his heart and blood-soaked Philip, 24, staggered into his bedroom but died minutes later in Kent, Washington.

    Worst robbery A HAPLESS crook targeted a gun shop full of customers, ignoring the marked patrol car parked outside.
    On seeing the cop at the counter, the would-be robber announced: “This is a hold up” and then fired a few wild shots.
    The officer in Seattle, Washington – and several other staff and customers who also drew their guns – returned fire, killing the man.

    Aircraft moony

    Air crash ... fatal moonies

    THREE Brazilians were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude when another plane approached. It seems they decided to “moon” at the people in the other plane but lost control of their own and crashed. They were found dead with their pants round their ankles.

    Shot rang in ears
    SOME people really do need to be protected from themselves.
    Take Ken Charles Barger, 47, who accidentally shot himself to death one morning in Newton, North Carolina.
    He woke to the sound of a ringing telephone beside his bed and reached out for it. But instead of the handset he grabbed his Smith & Wesson .38 Special.
    It discharged when he held it up to his ear.

  2. #2
    The Pikey Hunter
    Gerbil's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dirtydog
    “those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it.”
    fcuking ironic considering this is an article for Sun readers

  3. #3
    Thailand Expat
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    Quote Originally Posted by dirtydog
    At first they just hit each other over the head with frozen turnips
    My turnips have frozen on occassion as well--those Lake Tahoe winters, skiing without pants...

  4. #4

    R.I.P.


    dirtydog's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gerbil
    fcuking ironic considering this is an article for Sun readers
    about Americans

  5. #5
    ding ding ding
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gerbil View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by dirtydog
    “those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it.”
    fcuking ironic considering this is an article for Sun readers
    people that buy the Sun cannot read, they just look at the jugs on P3

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gerbil
    Originally Posted by dirtydog “those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it.”
    Reminds me of the former PM of New Zealand who was once asked whether he was concerned or not about the numbers of NZ youths leaving the country for Australia.

    Alledgedly his reply was "No worries as it raises the average IQ of both countries"

  7. #7
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    ^Piggy Muldoon.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by dirtydog
    POLISH farmer Krystof Azninski, 30, had been drinking with friends when it was suggested they strip naked and play some “men’s games.”
    About that time, I would've decided I needed new friends...

  9. #9
    I am in Jail
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    There's one where two gay blokes were having some fun with gerbils and one refused to exit. His lover took one of those toilet paper cardboard rolls and pushed it up in there hoping the gerb would think it's a tunnel and make his way out, he didn't. The lover then flicked his Bic to get a better view and there was an explosion. The gerb shot out of there like a cannon ball through the tube and hit the lover in the face and broke his nose. I wish I could have seen that one! Well, maybe not.

  10. #10
    diaw
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    Quote Originally Posted by Camel Toe View Post
    There's one where two gay blokes were having some fun with gerbils and one refused to exit. His lover took one of those toilet paper cardboard rolls and pushed it up in there hoping the gerb would think it's a tunnel and make his way out, he didn't. The lover then flicked his Bic to get a better view and there was an explosion. The gerb shot out of there like a cannon ball through the tube and hit the lover in the face and broke his nose. I wish I could have seen that one! Well, maybe not.
    Did your nose hurt much?

  11. #11
    The Pikey Hunter
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    Quote Originally Posted by Camel Toe View Post
    There's one where two gay blokes were having some fun with gerbils and one refused to exit. His lover took one of those toilet paper cardboard rolls and pushed it up in there hoping the gerb would think it's a tunnel and make his way out, he didn't. The lover then flicked his Bic to get a better view and there was an explosion. The gerb shot out of there like a cannon ball through the tube and hit the lover in the face and broke his nose. I wish I could have seen that one! Well, maybe not.
    Urban legend (and I should know)

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