Thread: Not just Thailand then...

What was it about "There's a sucker born every minute"?

"She does not have any problem with me being divorced".

I bet she doesn't!

My girlfriend forces me to financially support her whole family


By Quyet October 16, 2023 | 04:21 pm PT
My girlfriend asked me to send her parents and brother VND8 million ($327) a month, along with covering their expenses in case they get sick or involved with unexpected events.I’m 42 and divorced. My ex-wife has custody of our two kids, and I send them VND16 million a month as alimony.
My girlfriend is 35. We started dating a year ago after getting introduced to each other through mutual connections. She is pretty, kind, and sensitive. She knows how to make me happy, and most importantly, she does not have any problems with me being divorced.
However, her family background is rather complicated. Her parents are a bit like thugs, while her older brother is self-employed as he is not satisfied with working in office hours. He is now running his own hotpot shop which only serves in the evening, and he merely stays home doing nothing during the day.
I recently offered my girlfriend to move in with me. I also suggested that we register our marriage, though I do not have any plans for a wedding ceremony. I told her to quit her current job, which pays her a monthly salary of VND10 million, to be a housewife after our marriage as well. In compensation for that I will give her VND20 million every month, and she can keep the unused amount after paying for our living costs.
My girlfriend said she would accept my offer given that I promised to take care of her family. She said her parents and brother do not have stable jobs, so she wanted me to give them an additional VND8 million a month. On top of that, I have to cover their expenses in case they are sick or get involved in any unexpected issues that require money as well.
She also asked me to help her brother get a job, however, she said the job should be undemanding so that he could keep taking care of his hotpot business.
Honestly speaking, I am just a director of a foreign organization based in Vietnam. My title can sound high, but in fact I am not that powerful and wealthy.
Also, I think if I agree with my girlfriend’s requests, her family can demand even more from me in the future. They can also grow financially reliant on me. My reputation may be harmed as well in case I help my girlfriend’ brother to get a job but he then does it without responsibilities.
I want to find some way to both keep my relationship with my girlfriend and avoid being taken advantage of at the same time. What should I do?

https://e.vnexpress.net/news/love/my...y-4665525.html

“ want to find some way to both keep my relationship with my girlfriend and avoid being taken advantage of at the same time. What should I do?“



can’t do both. Besides what relationship talks about monthly compensation?

bozo.

Originally Posted by DrWilly

Besides what relationship talks about monthly compensation?

South East Asian ones ?

Originally Posted by harrybarracuda

I am just a director of a foreign organization based in Vietnam. My title can sound high, but in fact I am not that powerful and wealthy.

Would you like LIES with that?

Originally Posted by helge

South East Asian ones ?

It was a rhetorical question, because the answer is not all of them. Don’t assume your lived experience is generalizable.

Originally Posted by DrWilly

Besides what relationship talks about monthly compensation?

Originally Posted by helge

South East Asian ones ?

Originally Posted by DrWilly

It was a rhetorical question, because the answer is not all of them.

My suspicion is that your answer was "not the proper ones"

Originally Posted by DrWilly

Don’t assume your lived experience is generalizable.

But, Willy

When I asked my wife to stop playing around in the brothel, she needed some money of her own to exist.

It's compensation

You know how it works.

My mother stayed home to take care of the kids, cooked washed, wrote the bills etc etc

I hope my father "compensated" her for not having an income.

Maybe you catholics are different in that way too.

Not everyone marries a whore.

Originally Posted by DrWilly

Not everyone marries a whore.

True

(your wife did)

Originally Posted by OhOh

Show her the door.

Ask you "mutual connection" for another less demanding "live in girl friend".

You have never married a woman who has stopped working/earning a salary in the bar, to manage the home and take care of the household/children/extended family, friends, gambling buddies, loan sharks etc, when they arrived, and you become one of the only* financial source for your own, whole family, it seems.

*only meaning 1 of 10 faring paying a monthly allowance

Correct. I have not.

Originally Posted by david44

Would you like LIES with that?

Why? He could be a Director of an NGO and not on that big a salary.

Originally Posted by DrWilly

Not everyone thinks they married a whore.

FTFY.

Originally Posted by harrybarracuda

Why? He could be a Director of an NGO and not on that big a salary.

Yeah, right. Those NGO Directors are so altruistic.