Thread: Poll: How much trouble am I in?

^You are a wise man. The roommate did indeed take much of the blast, allowing me to escape in one piece.

You're dead meat Bettyboo. She's got until she gets home to think of a way to bump you off and get your lifeless body buried in the remains of the herb garden.

Great Sunday afternoon post, Boo. At least for the rest of us. Sent you a green, but it was returned stamped 'Poster Deceased'.

Originally Posted by hazz

shall we have some more polls the most likely mode of death and the most likely official cause?

The official cause in this country will always be suicide wouldn't it?

Originally Posted by Bettyboo

'No need to make them lunch because I've given them money to buy something from the little restaurant down the road'.

Most Asian's know what most herbs and spice plants look like and they probably sold off what they ripped out down at the Ma and Pa shop.

In fact go down there now, purchase them back, re-plant them and you may find your way out of this mess.

Originally Posted by Bettyboo

The Americans neeedn't have bothered spending billions on there Scorched Earth armies and bombs, all they needed was 2 Burmese workers with a machete, an industrial size lanmower and 20 baht each for lunch...

Now if that is not green material I dont know what is.

One of three options:
Go buy her a Merc afore she returns, have a heart attack - not faked - or fuck off pronto.

Dunno how sure the heart attack is, she may still kick the shits outta you.

Boo ? Boo you there? oh dear I think she may well have returned. Boo you alright? Do a runner whilst you've still got a chance!

Blame her! Its all her fault! Its not your job to push the help! Why didn't she post her garden off like a real person would?

Reverse psychology Boo...its not my fault your fucking garden got trashed by those nincompoops from Burma. I was busy working trying to earn a living for you and I. How else are we going to build your little shack in the far eastern provinces?

Works for me most of the time.

Originally Posted by Bettyboo

she didn't. I managed everything.

Serves you right then! Take it like a man.

Originally Posted by hazz

she'll kill one or both of the cats to teach me a lesson

Should kill the fucking horrible things regardless.

Nothing from Boo for 54 minutes. I think she's home. RIP.

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Mid*, Tickiteboo, Bettyboo, Wonton, Nabeel, trev, phunphin, rob, Strongarm

fess up Boo

^Could have been looking at the thread at the time of his unfortunate demise.....

she might not even notice
before

after

Originally Posted by Davis Knowlton

^ Could have been looking at the thread at the time of his unfortunate demise.....

indeed , still listed so obviously left the computer open on this page ...............

*** Operation Herb Garden ***

She came back.

I heard the car pulling into the drive and rushed down to take control of the situation, to implement Operation Herb Garden - what Davis might call the French/Italian Full Frontal Offensive.

Waiting behind the semi-closed front door, listening for the click of the boot release, I timed my exit to perfection as I scurried out and swiftly hooked up all the shopping, sprinting back inside to catch her up before she completed her march to the back door; the garden door. I threw the shopping bags onto the kitchen work-surface and in a Basil Faltyesque manouvre placed my shoulder infront of hers the second she opened the back door, pointing my arm across her at the devastation and blurted:
"Those fukin stupid Burmese idiots! I told them, I told them several times to leave that area alone. Why the landlord employees these Burmese idiots is beyond me" Then in a hushed and speedy voice adding: 'Ofcourse,myThaiisn'tverygoodsoyoucan'tfullyblamet hemiftheydidn'tunderstand.' "The Burmese idiots."

"Right, I'll clean the car then." I ran off and started to do just that.
(She loves a clean car, the first thing she does upon her return is to clean the car. Sometimes she asks me to help her, and I tell her I'm busy I'll do it in a while, then she does it by herself...)

"Brush the dust off first, don't just clean it quickly like you usually do."
"Yes, dear."

So I start the stupid Thai way, well the wife's way... , of cleaning the car by brushing the dust off first; I've always refused to do this, but on this occassion I took the care and time (and stupidity) to brush the dust off first.

"Don't go too quickly, get the dust off first or it scratches the paint." She shouts out the window.
"Yes, dear." And smile back to her, don't hold the gaze too long.

30 minutes later, yes I took my time, I dried the car off, went inside, unpacked the shopping, sweating perfusely as I went, smiled again, didn't hold her gaze again, and went up for a shower.

When I came out, yes I took my time, she said: "Enjoy in your merit."
I said: "Satiiit." (fuking hate saying it, refuse to actually, unless I'm in the doghouse) and towelled meself down.

5 minutes later, she brought in some sushi she'd bought at the market, and told me how her stomach felt better than this morning (major help there, me thinks...).

Job done. Top banana.

smells of delayed reaction ..............

is that it ?
think I'LL wait for the directors cut alternative ending

I call that MILDLY.

We were all wrong.

Or is this just a ploy?

Do a quick audit of all the known weapons in the house