A book: Once upon a time in the East - Hot and sticky yarns from rural Siam

[withnallstoke]

Mmmm. Guinness. Mmmm Friday. Friday + Guinness = amorous advances towards the New Chop Suey House staff.

Mmmmmmm.

An equation to ponder.
Where:-
C=Chang.
L=Lao Khao
W=Wallet
M=Missus
K=Knackers emptied

(C x L x W) /M = K

[OhOh]

M=Missus

But isn't his missus in Thailand?

[withnallstoke]

But isn't his missus in Thailand?

So is the Chang, Lao Khao, Wallet and empty knackersack.

But Fatman Whale has washed up in the Thames estuary, and floundering.

[somtamslap]

But isn't his missus in Thailand?

Finally got my kids' UK passports. What a tremendous, ball-ache of an undertaking that proved to be.

[OhOh]

So is the Chang

To be fair Chang is a Tesco's staple, £3.55L (190THB) in the Tesco Express, Croydon. Sales have rocketed during the last few months.

[somtamslap]

To be fair Chang is a Tesco's staple

Never seen it. Singha, the heathen brew, is all that can be found.

To be honest I wouldn't drink Chang here even if I could find it. Let's face it, shall we, it tastes fucking awful.

[withnallstoke]

To be fair Chang is a Tesco's staple, £3.55L (190THB) in the Tesco Express, Croydon.

Tesco Chang is actually a shifters brew, where HM customs and excise regulate the severity of the winkahol content by unstoppering it and widdling down the neck.

[OhOh]

What a tremendous, ball-ache of an undertaking that proved to be.

As a business tycoon now, couldn't you get one of those special investors visas for them? One could argue the presence of your family would be a marketing hit on the signing tour. The scratch and itch goes down well at the Viking Museum in York!

[Gerbil]

My maid always serves our soup bowls on plates.

You chav, my maid serves our Campbells in bowls, on top of plates which are on top of place mats. With 3 spoons.

You should up your game fella.

You Pikey. No napkins?

[somtamslap]

While your here, on a Thai forum reading about Thai related things... buy this...

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Once-Upon-Ti...rhf_se_p_img_7

[Necron99]

To be honest I wouldn't drink Chang here even if I could find it. Let's face it, shall we, it tastes fucking awful.

OMFg!

Blasphemer!

Stone him!

[Chittychangchang]

Chang the breakfast of champions!

A bottle a day keeps the constipation away.

[somtamslap]

A bottle a day keeps the constipation away.

Never a truer word spoken. Toilet time in Thailand is often a work of art. A 360 degree stipple is always pleasing to mine eye.

[Latindancer]

Agreed. Spraypainting in multi-hued swathes is always most satisfying for the doer.

[blue]

So is the Chang

To be fair Chang is a Tesco's staple, £3.55L (190THB) in the Tesco Express, Croydon. Sales have rocketed during the last few months.

Last time I saw it in tesco uk, like singha, it was a watery 5% , but that was a while ago and it may now have being gayed down to 4.8%.
Its not authentic .

[somtamslap]

Hi,

My name's Slap.

You may have seen me on such Jeremy Kyle episodes as 'I inadvertently asphyxiated my neigbours' pet duck in a tragic prophylactic accident'. Or 'Help! I'm addicted to cheeseburgers.'

Buy this and appease the demons within...

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Once-Upon-Ti...rhf_se_p_img_7

[Necron99]

This sort of Pr is only going to get you so far Slap.
What you need to do is start a protest group and a gofunndme account for people to donate to to help you launch a campaign to fight the vile racist stereotyping in the book.
Letters to the editor, protests outside Amazon's office etc. Bring Por over to give interviews about how the filthy rag has damaged his life and Issan's good reputation..

Sales will skyrocket.

[somtamslap]

launch a campaign to fight the vile racist stereotyping in the book

There's only the occasional 'peasant' tossed around in the pages. But I'm open to options. You are hereby hired as my chief PR rep. I did initially employ withnall, but he got waylaid in the cowshed.

[Dillinger]

Mr Slap, why don't you make yourself a signature with your bloody amazon link in it ?

[somtamslap]

^ Err, coz I'm an idiot?

[OhOh]

Start a twitter campaign to allow you family in the UK. They are under duress from withers. Easy to prove get granny on the TV.

[somtamslap]

Book now available in paperback.

Support the cause, chaps.

The 'get Slap the fuck back East' cause, that is.



http://www.amazon.co.uk/Once-Upon-Ti...rhf_se_p_img_7

[Necron99]

Good job!

Are the pages perforated and double quilted?

[Gerbil]

^are they soft and absorbant?

[Dillinger]

with a taint of Aloe Vera ?