no transforming robots, but scary toilets: Japan

[nidhogg]

So - here we go for a second try at a picture thread.

Just got back from a short work trip to Japan. Not alas the "Big Sushi" but a small, provincial town located on (I think) Kyushu island (pretty much one of the southern most "home" islands).

My first and biggest shock was to discover that Japanese women do not go around covered in face loads of fresh jism. Many of the women were however achingly beautiful, and I considered offering my services in a private face splashing, but, fortunately perhaps, the language barrier seemed insurmountable.

In the same vein as the deep dissapointment with the face/jism thing, during my admittedly short trip, I saw not a single raging monster, no transforming robots, no power ranger, samurai or geisha either. I did, for a mad few minutes think the streets were liberally filled with porn starlets on they way to work, but enquiries elicited the information that these were, indeed normal school girls on thier way to or from school.

Deep dissapointment all round.

Checking into my hotel, I was met with one of the wonders of japanese civilization - the toilet. Frankly I was pretty intimidated, and it apparently has more raw computing power than my small lap top:



The control panel on the side had options for (I think) bidet, bum wash, and powerful deodorant". Sitting on the seat it was extremely plesantly warm (heated) - and the bum gun spray water - which fired automatically on pressing the button (and apparently has a sensor to locate your starfish!!) - was warm.

The temptation to stay and to mull porn starlets while having my sphincter delicately sprayed with pleasantly hot water, was, I do admit, there....

As noted, this was a small provincial town/city, so no great startling stuff. I was intrigued by the large number of working vending machines everywhere:



..and I could not help but musing that these would have a pretty damn short lifespan in either Thailand, or indeed my own home country....especially this one:




family mart was a welcome sight, and looked pretty same same as here:




But the local Honda dealer confused me:




Taxi drivers were apparently from a different planet than those in bangkok - they were uniformed, smart, polite and the taxis never smelt as though some one had had sex/died/eaten som tam in them:




All in all, "non-Tokyo" Japan was pleasantly bland, the people unfailingly polite the urban environment spotlessly clean, and despite my crowded work schedule, a pleasure to visit. Hopefully next time a bit more time off. This time I was hosted almost continually, from touch down to take off, so little time to explore. Shame. I shall learn some Japanese for next time, especially "Excuse me, may I offer my services in a facial jisming".

[natalie8]

Nice thread, nh. More pics please! Whay did you have to go to southern provincial Japan? for work? Tell me more! Gleen on its way. (get it?) 55555

[aging one]

Nice. I always love the trip reports, any more photos? If so keep them coming.

[somtamslap]

It is now my mission in life - everything else can fuck off - to own one of these shatters..

*Swoons*

[Begbie]

Dirtydog will be jealous as he now has a major rival in toilet photography.

Nice thread, were any of the vending machines selling used knickers or is that an urban myth ?

[Boon Mee]

I was intrigued by the large number of working vending machines everywhere and I could not help but musing that these would have a pretty damn short lifespan in either Thailand, or indeed my own home country.

No looters roaming about then we take it?

Good pics - couldn't resist a dig - heh

[Bangyai]

Many of the women were however achingly beautiful, and I considered offering my services in a private face splashing, but, fortunately perhaps, the language barrier seemed insurmountable.

Try sign language next time. A few sound effects might help too.Always works for me.

[SiLeakHunt]

must try and wangle myself a trip to Yippon

cheers

[larvidchr]

Always wanted one of those "thrones", must beat constantly leaking bum guns

[rawlins]

Good thread.. Does the toilet massage your balls as well?

Could have got some pics of the Japanese school girls... or would that kind of thing likely have got you arrested?

[SiLeakHunt]

Is there an irreverant adjective similar to "piss artist" to describe the designers of these new fangled thunder boxes ?

Cheers

[misskit]

Very nice and representative of the way all small town Japan looks.

It would be nice to have one of those toilet seats in Thailand but an electric outlet near the toilet is necessary. A recipe for disaster in most Thai homes.

[kingwilly]

Great OP, thanks mate

[BobR]

"Taxi drivers were apparently from a different planet than those in bangkok"


Nice post and nice pictures, I love Japan. Yes, the taxi drivers are different, but the equivalent of 300 baht certainly won't get you from the airport to your hotel like it will here.

Toto. which is one of the companies that makes those fancy toilets has a shop on Sukhumvit near Nana, those "scary" ones have a scary price, about 140,000 Baht.

[Gerbil]

It would be nice to have one of those toilet seats in Thailand but an electric outlet near the toilet is necessary. A recipe for disaster in most Thai homes.

Butterfly would offer his electrical/plumbing expertise. You may end up with a 21st century electric chair though .

[nidhogg]

Toto. which is one of the companies that makes those fancy toilets has a shop on Sukhumvit near Nana, those "scary" ones have a scary price, about 140,000 Baht.

What I forgot to say is that those toilets were in all the loos I visited (not that many!) - my hotel room, at the offices I visited as well as, most interestingly, in the airport. There seemed to be a range of options - the office ones were the most sophisticated, then the hotel, then the airport ones which ony had about three or four buttons...

[Gerbil]

Japanese Toilet Manufacturer Unveils Hot New Bidet that Shoots Flames

Bidets have long been used in Europe and other countries by women and men that prefer to have their nether regions cleaned with a stream of water rather than using toilet paper, and now, Japan’s leading toilet manufacturer, Toto Ltd., has developed an amazing new bidet that uses a flame instead of a stream of water.

Although at first it sounds bizarre and dangerous, the company claims that it’s perfectly safe and customers seem to prefer the warm flames to the typical cold stream of water. Apparently the secret is in the patented gas control valve.


The primary benefits of this setup are the automatic sterilization produced by the scorching hot flame and the fact that women no longer need to use a razor to shave their pubic areas. Once the hair has been singed off, the skin is perfectly smooth with no sign of stubble or razor burn. Toto VP of sales says, “The built-in pubic hair removal system has been the number one reason for the significantly higher sales numbers we are seeing with this unit, compared to our other models, that use streams of water.”

The units also contain a built-in air freshener to eliminate not only the naturally occurring odors, but those produced by the burning hair as well.

Once you get used to cleaning without toilet paper, you may also want to get one of these handy portable units for those times when you’re away from home and can’t live without that nice clean-as-a-whistle feeling.

CORRECTION: My bad. It turns out, upon further research, that the Toto bidets are not actually supposed to shoot flames, but the electrical wiring for the heated seat and warm air drying system is faulty. Toto has recalled 180,000 of the units to be repaired at no charge.

The Toto Z series, which ranges in price from $1,680 to $2,600 — and actually does use water like every other bidet — has caught fire in three reported incidents and emitted clouds of smoke in 26 other incidents. No injuries were reported.

“Fortunately, nobody was using the toilets when the fire broke out and there were no injuries,” company spokesperson Emi Tanaka said. “The fire would have been just under your buttocks.”

[Norton]

The fire would have been just under your buttocks.

[loafie]

I, too, love those Japanese toilets. I would have one if I could afford it. And the vending machines are everywhere!

While they do have the ubiquitous Family Mart, it is better known by the nickname 'famima'. Also, Starbucks is 'stabah'. And if you inquire about 'fa-king' you'll be directed to a fast food chain called First Kitchen (which is only slightly better than being slapped).

[Minnie Maugham]

Guess you didn't need to visit the loos as the train stations...

[Jesus Jones]

They have those bogs in Fashion Island at Min Buri. Quite pleasant in my opinion.