Abstaining from sex in LOS

**The Gentleman Scamp** · 04-06-2007, 01:02 PM

Most of the carnie twats I used to work with can't wait to get to Thailand and have sex with girls* - they are practically undoing their belts as they pass customs.

Other blokes, for example actor Willem Dafoe, just pop over for a break from filming a movie in Hanoi and remain faithful to their wife whilst enjoying a coffee at the Banyan Tree Hotel.

Is Thailand a silly place to live with a woman and attempt to stay faithful or does the ubiquitous temptation act as a test of the relationships strength, OR.. Is it simply not an issue?

Perhaps after so many visits to the land of mostly plastic smiles the novelty of sex has just worn off, I doubt it - it could be because I am on the phone to the Phillipines everyday and a certain woman has captured my heart or maybe, just maybe I am on the road to growing up.

It's well over a week now, and I've seen a few hotties about but gone is the desire to chat them up, it would just seem rude, just as it would be rude if I approached a famous seppo actor on a rooftop bar and said "How come your mouth is so fucking wide?" instead of politely acknowledging his prescence, offering him an L&M menthol and asking if Sony Pictures allowed him to keep his Green Goblin costume.

I am not counting the days like a smoker who has quit, the urge may hit me again at some stage - and if it did, then what do you, the reader of this post deem as unfaithful, where do you draw the line?

To some women, being unfaithful is getting 'involved' with another woman wheras many women would turn a blind eye to the occasional short time so long as that's all it was. Personally I think that shagging anyone else is being unfaithful, but what about paying some woman to masturbate you off then mop up your spaggle with a damp towel? I don't think that is being unfaithful, just wasting money paying somebody for something you have done thousands of time at no expense whatsoever.

Is shagging some brass when you actually really like somebody in the country next door really that fulfilling? Is it worth risking the fact that it could result in nothing more than guilt and emptiness or may even turn out to be a sexually cringeworthy two hours of your life with a cheap, useless slag - a bit like Willem Dafoe must have felt after watching that movie he made with Madonna in 1993 - Body Of Evidence.

I guess time will tell.... By the way I wanted to start a poll on 'HOW FAR IS UNFAITHFUL' but I don't know how because I am thick as shit.

* Et al.

**slimboyfat** · 04-06-2007, 01:05 PM

told you mrsq.

speak of the devil and all that

**slimboyfat** · 04-06-2007, 01:07 PM

anyway TGS, abstaining from sex is probably ok if you are drinking coffee at the Banyan tree.

The problem arises when you decide to go out for a quick beer......

i usually go for the handjob option even then though.

**mrsquirrel** · 04-06-2007, 01:14 PM

He is so predictable we don't need an atomic clock to keep time anymore.

**DrB0b** · 04-06-2007, 01:16 PM

Just depends where you live, how much you drink, and what kind of person you are. Nobody's forcing you to have sex with anybody. It's not a Thailand issue, it's a personal issue. Indulge if you want to, just don't blame anybody else and don't blame the circumstances - you're not a kid in a candy shop, you're an adult who should take responsibility for his actions. As far as where drawing the line in being faithful goes - if you don't know where the line is then you're probably in the wrong relationship. (BTW the "you" in this post is not you, Scampy. It's just that saying "one" all the time sounds so poncey

)

**ChiangMai noon** · 04-06-2007, 01:21 PM

I have been faithful to my wife since long before we were married.

I would consider any form of sex to be an act of unfaithfulness.

**DrB0b** · 04-06-2007, 01:28 PM

Originally Posted by ChiangMai noon

I have been faithful to my wife since long before we were married.

Sex with yourself doesn't count?

By the way, when are you going to return that butt-plug? The guys at the temple have being asking for it back for the last two weeks.

**The Gentleman Scamp** · 04-06-2007, 01:33 PM

Originally Posted by BOb

if you don't know where the line is then you're probably in the wrong relationship.

Well I guess the line is anything that would hurt your partner if she found out. I am not fighting any temptation here but what about when you have been in a relationship for a long time. I know a guy who loves his wife but likes to indulge in the occasional short time, and that's all it is.

I used to think he was wrong but I can understand it now.

SEX
LOVE
COMPANIONSHIP
MARRAIGE/MONOGAMY
REPRODUCTION
PARENTHOOD

Which of the above is NOT natural?

What if after 10 years you still love your wife but don't fancy her anymore? Surely it would hurt her more to leave her for another woman than it would to pay to shag one once in a while and keep it to yourself.

**ChiangMai noon** · 04-06-2007, 01:37 PM

Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp

I know a guy who loves him wife but likes to indulge in the occasional short time, and that's all it is.

Bloody hell Scampy.
I hardly know anyone that doesn't match that description.

**The Gentleman Scamp** · 04-06-2007, 01:38 PM

Come on Lily, I see you looking.

Originally Posted by CMN

Bloody hell Scampy.
I hardly know anyone that doesn't match that description.

Does that make it ok?

My biggest fear of commitment is putting myself in a position where I could hurt someone else, but I suppose when the attraction wanes and the stretchmarks have made her stomach resemble a scrotum on a hot day, it is better to 'get your fix' and return home happy than lie to yourself and stay faithful because your god said you should then get all sexually fustrated and kick your wife in the fanny, then go to confession and apologize to the vicar but not her like many stupid men who's ideas have been bent out of shape by religion or culture.

Ok, so this is acceptable to us because Asian women are used to it and we are surrounded by it, but what about 'normal' folk back home? What about Willem Dafoe? For al I know he could have gone out, though I'm sure his sights would have been aimed a little higher than Nana.

**Lily** · 04-06-2007, 01:38 PM

Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp

What if after 10 years you still love your wife but don't fancy her anymore? Surely it would hurt her more to leave her for another woman than it would to pay to shag one once in a while and keep it to yourself.

A trifle condescending there.

If you don't care for her anymore it would be more considerate to leave her so that she can find someone who interested in her.

**slimboyfat** · 04-06-2007, 01:44 PM

Originally Posted by Lily

A trifle condescending there.

If you don't care for her anymore it would be more considerate to leave her so that she can find someone who interested in her.

thanks for reassuring me

**dantilley** · 04-06-2007, 01:44 PM

Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp

politely acknowledging his prescence, offering him an L&M menthol and asking if Sony Pictures allowed him to keep his Green Goblin costume.

If this is true, you could at least have offered him a decent smoke... Mind you, fitting I suppose: menthol = Green Goblin, wonder if he picked up on it though...

**The Gentleman Scamp** · 04-06-2007, 01:50 PM

If anyone wants to continue this debate in person I'll be (ironically) in Nana in about 1 hour (3pm) with another TD member.

**DrB0b** · 04-06-2007, 01:59 PM

Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp

Originally Posted by BOb

if you don't know where the line is then you're probably in the wrong relationship.

Well I guess the line is anything that would hurt your partner if she found out. I am not fighting any temptation here but what about when you have been in a relationship for a long time. I know a guy who loves his wife but likes to indulge in the occasional short time, and that's all it is.

I used to think he was wrong but I can understand it now.

SEX
LOVE
COMPANIONSHIP
MARRAIGE/MONOGAMY
REPRODUCTION
PARENTHOOD

Which of the above is NOT natural?

What if after 10 years you still love your wife but don't fancy her anymore? Surely it would hurt her more to leave her for another woman than it would to pay to shag one once in a while and keep it to yourself.

True. I don't see any point in being sexually frustrated because of some twisted sense of morality. Problem here is that the missus probably won't be so pragmatic. You've got marriage and monagamy stuck together up there, they don't really belong together, lots of animals are monogamous without ever getting married so marriage is an unnatural state but monogamy isn't. In the end though it's a matter of personal choice, I've met very few genuinely monogamous people.

**Little Chuchok** · 04-06-2007, 02:47 PM

Blow jobs don't count.

**ChiangMai noon** · 04-06-2007, 02:49 PM

Nor does nipple sucking.

**kingwilly** · 04-06-2007, 02:52 PM

perfect news! thanks

**DrB0b** · 04-06-2007, 02:56 PM

It's not infidelity if you don't say "I love you"

**DrB0b** · 04-06-2007, 02:58 PM

Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp

What if after 10 years you still love your wife but don't fancy her anymore? Surely it would hurt her more to leave her for another woman than it would to pay to shag one once in a while and keep it to yourself.

There's more to love than shagging.

**DrB0b** · 04-06-2007, 03:02 PM

Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp

but I suppose when the attraction wanes and the stretchmarks have made her stomach resemble a scrotum on a hot day,

Luckily women never notice beer bellies, bald patches, farting in bed, man-tits, or stinky feet - otherwise all us blokes would end up old and single. Even luckier many of them have no idea just how shallow some of us are.

**The Ghost Of The Moog** · 04-06-2007, 03:16 PM

Is the entire purpose of this topic to inform us that you saw Willem Dafoe?

If it is then let me be first to say that I am dazzled by your access to A/B list celebs. Even if the link only extend to seeing the thesp briefly on the other side of the caff'. You should have gone up to him and said you were in showbusiness. Opportunity lost.

Otherwise I might note that the Banyan Tree is not far away from Babylon, where one can assuage one's doubts about male/female infidelity by being the recipient of some mansuck madness

**sabang** · 04-06-2007, 03:36 PM

Originally Posted by ChiangMai noon

Nor does nipple sucking.

Thats a relief, I'm a bit of a nipple molester.

**sabang** · 04-06-2007, 03:40 PM

After one year living in Pattaya, my mongering count is one overnighter and one ST BJ. Plenty of nipple molesting and groping though.
Thats the sort of thing you don't admit around here.
Frankly, I have less urge to wander as I get older and I certainly don't want to hurt my wife. But morally speaking, a periodic naughty has nothing to do with husband and wife love.

**sabang** · 04-06-2007, 03:41 PM

Originally Posted by The_Ghost_Of_The_Moog

Is the entire purpose of this topic to inform us that you saw Willem Dafoe?

If it is then let me be first to say that I am dazzled by your access to A/B list celebs. Even if the link only extend to seeing the thesp briefly on the other side of the caff'. You should have gone up to him and said you were in showbusiness. Opportunity lost.

Otherwise I might note that the Banyan Tree is not far away from Babylon, where one can assuage one's doubts about male/female infidelity by being the recipient of some mansuck madness

I want to know what Scampy was doing in the Banyan Tree.

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