Thread: Faarrrrrk its the Ark...

where is out Watterinja ? I am sure he has a good explanation

he did claim on another forum that men living 300 years was quite common in Ancient times, so not surprise that Noah could live 600 years like any normal person

Originally Posted by slackula

a 600 year old dude was allegedly cramming ~298 animals per minute (or roughly 5 per second) onto a boat

Might have been a speedboat.

Noah was a kinky bastard...no doubt about that.

actually it would all be possible if Noah was actually an Alien, and the ark was nothing else than a big spaceship

could explain it all actually,

Noah's lark was to decompress with a lil help from Melvbot and the Apple puree cloners .He could easily have had Dr Who have all the DNA is his FiloArk leaving room for deck quoits and Noah's bouys stowed with stokers to obviate friggin' in the riggin

The foul rest could come as carrion
until we reach the Holy ground once more

I think Noah just said....farrrrk it all and moved to New Zealand with his sheep.

Originally Posted by Butterfly

actually it would all be possible if Noah was actually an Alien, and the ark was nothing else than a big spaceship could explain it all actually,

Occam disagrees..

Not to mention the amount of feed he would have needed to load onto the boat to keep them animals alive. And what about the poo ?

The arc would have been awash with piles of shit, literally.

And please, please dont even think about the danger when several elephants decided to have sex.

Bloody good job I am atheist !

I have just made a nice plate of chameleon and mole fricasse marinating ready for dinner tonight !

P.S.
Could you please clarify the 'unclean' bit - Halal or kosher ?

Did a scale drawing once of the ark(Noah's) as described in the Bible.

It was a huge boat and very seaworthy due it's size and construction, divided by decks and bulkheads. It was covered with a roof. It had no sails.

There was a roofed top deck for living quarters. a deck below for stores, a deck below that for the beasts and below that the bilge.

Did he address animal cruelty laws and regulations ?

Originally Posted by kingwilly

Originally Posted by MeMock

They found the Arc decades ago. Not that anyone will believe it as the media will only report on some idiot with a Dr before his name who will decide that his special way of carbon dating is better then others and that the boat is in fact on 7 months old.

Yeah, its damn annoying when an expert in the field disproves one's belief in the 'facts' as one wishes to portray them.

Thumbs Up - greenie.

Originally Posted by PaddyGreen

Noah's lark was to decompress with a lil help from Melvbot and the Apple puree cloners .He could easily have had Dr Who have all the DNA is his FiloArk leaving room for deck quoits and Noah's bouys stowed with stokers to obviate friggin' in the riggin

The foul rest could come as carrion
until we reach the Holy ground once more

???????

W. T. F.

Is this guy for real???

Originally Posted by ENT

Did a scale drawing once of the ark(Noah's) as described in the Bible.

It was a huge boat and very seaworthy due it's size and construction, divided by decks and bulkheads. It was covered with a roof. It had no sails.

There was a roofed top deck for living quarters. a deck below for stores, a deck below that for the beasts and below that the bilge.

oh well, MUST BE TRUE then, i you drew it

Originally Posted by ENT

It had no sails.

And exactly one window, 18-24 inches square to provide air for the millions of animals on board.

Originally Posted by Butterfly

he did claim on another forum that men living 300 years was quite common in Ancient times, so not surprise that Noah could live 600 years like any normal person

Back then they could.

Originally Posted by MeMock

Originally Posted by Butterfly

he did claim on another forum that men living 300 years was quite common in Ancient times, so not surprise that Noah could live 600 years like any normal person

Back then they could.

Didn't they marry ?

Originally Posted by Panda

Any dinosaur bones found in there?

I always wondered if Noah included woodworm in his menagerie.

so how did he feed T-rex for 40 days ?

Get Answers - Answers in Genesis

Originally Posted by MeMock

Get Answers - Answers in Genesis

"... Although biblical skeptics often dismiss this account as pure mythology, Christians should accept the word of God who was there rather than the opinions of fallible men who were not...".

The "word of God" being the Bible. That was written by men. Falliable men. Falliable men that weren't there. Contradiction upon contradiction innit.

Originally Posted by kingwilly

so how did he feed T-rex for 40 days ?

From the link:

Dinosaurs could have eaten basically the same foods as the other animals. The large sauropods could have eaten compressed hay, other dried plant material, seeds and grains, and the like. Carnivorous dinosaurs—if any were meat-eaters before the Flood—could have eaten dried meat, reconstituted dried meat, or slaughtered animals. Giant tortoises would have been ideal to use as food in this regard. They were large and needed little food to be maintained themselves. There are also exotic sources of meat, such as fish that wrap themselves in dry cocoons.

I've yet to see a fish that wraps itself in a dry cocoon but it does sound kinda appetizing in a weird kinda way.

and what did they do when two Brontosaurus' got frisky ?

and does it answer how many sexually transmitted diseases that Noah and his family had ?

and does it tell us what they did with 40 days worth of shit ?

Originally Posted by kingwilly

and does it tell us what they did with 40 days worth of shit ?

Actually yeah, it does... Complete with illustrations:

What Did Noah and His Family Do with the Animal Waste?

As much as 12 U.S. tons (11 m. tons) of animal waste may have been produced daily. The key to keeping the enclosures clean was to avoid the need for Noah and his family to do the work. The right systems could also prevent the need to change animal bedding. Noah could have accomplished this in several ways. One possibility would be to allow the waste to accumulate below the animals, much as we see in modern pet shops. In this regard, there could have been slatted floors, and animals could have trampled their waste into the pits below. Small animals, such as birds, could have multiple levels in their enclosures, and waste could have simply accumulated at the bottom of each.

The danger of toxic or explosive manure gases, such as methane, would be alleviated by the constant movement of the Ark, which would have allowed manure gases to be constantly released. Secondly, methane, which is half the density of air, would quickly find its way out of a small opening such as a window. There is no reason to believe that the levels of these gases within the Ark would have approached hazardous levels.

Alternatively, sloped floors would have allowed the waste to flow into large central gutters. Noah’s family could have then dumped this overboard without an excessive expenditure of manpower.

The problem of manure odor may, at first thought, seem insurmountable. But we must remember that, throughout most of human history, humans lived together with their farm animals. Barns, separate from human living quarters, are a relatively recent development.

While the voyage of the Ark may not have been comfortable or easy, it was certainly doable, even under such unprecedented circumstances.

It's nothing if not comprehensive!

haha, just like a group of Dungeons and Dragons nerds, they think of and explain everything