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  1. #26
    Isle of discombobulation Joe 90's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by panama hat View Post
    Yup, he's done well for himself.
    In the current climate they're not many jobs going for expats that have been living their youth up in Thailand for over a decade.
    Bearing in mind there are probably home office spouse visa considerations to take into account.

    So yes, I concur he has done well.

    Good luck with it all Dill.

    Looking forward to your next thread "Confessions of a Brummie bus driver".
    Shalom

  2. #27
    Thailand Expat misskit's Avatar
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    Driving a bus seems cool to me, unless it’s a school bus (full of monkeys!)

    I always wanted to drive a commuter bus.

  3. #28
    Excommunicated baldrick's Avatar
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    who cleans up the needles in the back row ?

  4. #29
    Making people dance. :-)
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    Quote Originally Posted by misskit View Post
    Driving a bus seems cool to me
    I always wanted to be a bus driver just to drive past the bus stops, then see the people jumping up and down in me mirror.

  5. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Edmond View Post
    I always wanted to be a bus driver just to drive past the bus stops, then see the people jumping up and down in me mirror.
    Years ago when working at Charles de Gaulle airport in Paris I daily used a local, numerous stops, bus to get home after work.
    On one particular day it was obviously a new driver who managed to take a wrong turn and was soon heading off up the highway away from Paris.
    I still recall the reactions of the bus passengers - great entertainment.
    It took quite sometime to get back on to the normal route

  6. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Edmond View Post
    I always wanted to be a bus driver just to drive past the bus stops, then see the people jumping up and down in me mirror.
    I do that quite a bit, daydreaming mainly but sometimes when I'm bored...and it's quite a lonely job...the ones who sprint to the bus stops, screaming and waving there arms up and down... I will sometimes just turn my head to the right, like I haven't seen them

    I do miss a few bus stops too after the Bell has been pressed. That doesn't go down well.

  7. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Happy As Larry View Post
    On one particular day it was obviously a new driver who managed to take a wrong turn and was soon heading off up the highway away from Paris.
    I haven't gone up a highway yet, but have taken a few wrong turns... That's when you quickly need to think of low bridges
    The worst one was with a load of schoolkids who gave me a load of shit. It's worse still when you are radioing through and are trying to explain and they can hear the noise

    I've spoken to old timers though and they say you never stop making wrong turns, especially when you learn loads more routes because sometimes you will lapse and think you are on a different route, but with experience you just learn how to Bullshit and calm passengers by telling thsm there's a diversion as you reverse out of some fuckers cul de sac.

  8. #33
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    ^ you would have thought by now they'd install some GPS route thingamybob

  9. #34
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    Other things I do quite regular, trap passengers in the front doors. If you are quick pressing the open button it will hardly squeeze them. It's never good when it's the elderly or someone's child though.

    Oh and forgetting to change the destination blind

    It's been quite eventful so far. I actually failed my first test.

    I'm getting there though

  10. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by strigils View Post
    you would have thought by now they'd install some GPS route thingamybob
    I know. They won't do it though because they say it's a distraction and using a smartphone or smartwatch in the cab will quickly get you the sack.

    There are cameras all over the buses, if you brake too hard, speed or swerve... a flashing red light appears on the all around drive cam and it records everything, outside, and you inside shouting your obscenities.

    About 6 of the people I started with have been sacked already. It's not for everyone

  11. #36
    Thailand Expat David48atTD's Avatar
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    Great story, but maybe Train Driving maybe might be more your go?

  12. #37
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    ^^ 555 do they run a numpty of the week/month comp using the footage in the charabanc social club?

  13. #38
    Thailand Expat armstrong's Avatar
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    I think they'd be some kind of background check for a bus driver right? How'd he swing that?

  14. #39
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    Do they still have indian conductor on the buses dill? Or have whitey finally regained control of that splendid occupation?

  15. #40
    Isle of discombobulation Joe 90's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by David48atTD View Post
    Great story, but maybe Train Driving maybe might be more your go?
    Train driving is a different ball game altogether in the UK.

    Thousands of applicants for one job because they get paid very well.

    The Brucie bonus is suicide pay, if someone jumps out in front of your train you get a cash payment and time off.
    The payments go up and time off each time it happens untill after the third time you can get early retirement.

  16. #41
    กงเกวียนกำเกวียน HuangLao's Avatar
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    Union shop, Dill....?

    Just asking.


  17. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by HuangLao View Post
    Union shop, Dill....?
    I would not hold your breath.

  18. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paleo Robbie View Post
    Its 2021 , not sure about Brum, but in London its all cashless , you need to buy a pre paid card and press it against a scanner and it deducts the money from the card .
    You cannot pay by cash , no need for bus conductors



    All the fun's gone out of it. My Grandad gave me his machine for clipping the customer tickets... I've still got it somewhere.

  19. #44
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    My school bus driver used to be known as 'Bummer Lyons'. It probably wasn't fair but once the name had spawned it was never going away.

    I think all that had happened was that a kid in the front row had played up, threw something at the back of the drivers head maybe, and 'Bummer' had turned round and grabbed him on the leg. The legend was born and it wasn't going away in rural Somerset.

    We used to shout 'Bummer Lyons' and then duck back behind the seat. If he caught you he'd stop the bus and kick you off, wherever we were.

    Poor bloke, kids are wankers and we tormented this guy.

    Beware Dill.
    Last edited by Mendip; 10-02-2021 at 06:05 AM.

  20. #45
    Thailand Expat misskit's Avatar
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    Minutes after the Loma Prieta earthquake in San Francisco, my usual commute bus driver saw me standing on a curb near the usual bus stop. She stopped the bus, opened the door, and screamed, “Get in! We’re going home!” I did as she instructed and that woman drove like a bat out of hell, past all the sweaty palmed people and destruction and over the Golden Gate Bridge. What a mess she got out in front of. She got us over to Marin County before traffic had a chance to back up. I’m ever grateful. Someone I won’t forget.

  21. #46
    Thailand Expat Saint Willy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mendip View Post

    Poor bloke, kids are wankers and we tormented this guy.
    Indeed.
    Quote Originally Posted by misskit View Post
    Minutes after the Loma Prieta earthquake in San Francisco, my usual commute bus driver saw me standing on a curb near the usual bus stop. She stopped the bus, opened the door, and screamed, “Get in! We’re going home!” I did as she instructed and that woman drove like a bat out of hell, past all the sweaty palmed people and destruction and over the Golden Gate Bridge. What a mess she got out in front of. She got us over to Marin County before traffic had a chance to back up. I’m ever grateful. Someone I won’t forget.
    Wow, hero like.

  22. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mendip View Post
    My school bus driver used to be known as 'Bummer Lyons'. It probably wasn't fair but once the name had spawned it was never going away.

    I think all that had happened was
    Yeah, it's funny what some of us shut out of our lives from our childhoods. I'm guessing it happened on a school excursion and will explain your love and vocation of studying and handling rock

    Thankfully those little bastards are still off school here and I'm mostly driving around an empty bus, supplemented by the government. Long may it continue.


    Quote Originally Posted by misskit View Post
    Minutes after the Loma Prieta earthquake in San Francisco, my usual commute bus driver saw me standing on a curb near the usual bus stop. She stopped the bus, opened the door, and screamed, “Get in! We’re going home!” I did as she instructed and that woman drove like a bat out of hell, past all the sweaty palmed people and destruction and over the Golden Gate Bridge. What a mess she got out in front of. She got us over to Marin County before traffic had a chance to back up. I’m ever grateful. Someone I won’t forget.
    Wow, not all heroes wear capes, some are in blazers.
    Yeah, you'd have got a hand gesture from me showing that I'm late and there's another bus a couple of minutes behind

  23. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by beerlaodrinker View Post
    Do they still have indian conductor on the buses dill?
    When was the last time you visited the UK mate?











    The great thing about that bus is the smell inside. I dunno if it's the rubber but new cars don't smell like that anymore

  24. #49
    Thailand Expat
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    How is your daughter settling in Dill?. Obviously not at school yet, so that shock is to come but is she over the cold and grey yet.

  25. #50
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    Does anyone really love the cold and grey?
    I see a lot of joggers and cyclists out there though in all weather.

    She hasn't complained about it, loved the snow. There's loads of parks and greenery here and she is happy outdoors, on her bike, scooter or skates.its not often we venture out in that funking freezing cold though
    She started school last August and it was a lovely walk to school through the parks and past the canal. Had a great Indian summer too. Lovely having a dry heat again and long summer days. You pay for that in the winter, which has to be everyone's least favourite season but spring is around the corner and the summer to look forward to again.

    In an ideal world, I'd be out of here and in Thailand or the Maldives (if I won that 125 mill on euromillions last night) for winter, but back here for the other 3 seasons.

    International school did the little un no favours though and she is playing catch up now but has a great teacher.

    All in all its good to be back.

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