My post-lockdown commute back to work

[Shutree]

Man I hear ya Shutree. I can't ride a stationary bike. I have to be out seeing different places and scenery. In the US I had a few buddies that used to do those "Spinning" classes. I went and watched one time. Spinning alright...... Peddling your ass off to nowhere while some drill sergeant is yelling "GO...You can do it" crap. Nice thing about doing it outside is once you get 20km from your house you do not need someone yelling you can do it. You better do it or you won't get home.

Needless to say, I ride around my area up here and interestingly I see many neighbors out and about and they usually wave and say Good Morning.

I have used a bike for the past few years to go about the different towns I have lived and had a plan to get more use out of it now that I have time out here in the sticks. The problem is the 3km stretch out to a tarmac road, there are simply too many dogs lounging around the lane waiting for some fun. I very occasionally see a Thai guy cycle past the house, he always wears thick, long socks and carries a long stick. You can hear the chain of dogs barking before he comes and after he goes. It can't be very enjoyable.

At least this way I get some use out of the bike. If I get too bored my alternative plan is to keep the bike at the gf's family house closer to the main roads and drive down there every time I want to ride.

This is the first place I can remember living, city and country, where I cannot run or ride from my front door.

[Stumpy]

The problem is the 3km stretch out to a tarmac road, there are simply too many dogs lounging around the lane waiting for some fun. I very occasionally see a Thai guy cycle past the house, he always wears thick, long socks and carries a long stick. You can hear the chain of dogs barking before he comes and after he goes. It can't be very enjoyable.

Yeah that would suck. On a trip back from the states I brought back a cattle prod because I would take my dogs for a walk to the river and numerous neighbor dogs would come out and attack. The barking and snarling that ensued seemed to be a calling for more to come. Initially I told my wife to go tell those folks keep their damn dogs in the yard. Wife said "They won't do it. So took out my Cattle prod on a few walks and zapped them.... and I mean ZAP. Cattle Prods pack a wallop. I hit a few of the bigger Alpha males and the message was sent. Now they all steer clear of me. I also have a Tactical flashlight that has a Stun zapper in the bezel. It also packs a wallop. I just have to hit the button and that crackling noise sends them running. I loaned my Cattle Prod to a Thai buddy at work as he had a dog attack his boy riding a bike. He still has it and messages me that they love it and the dogs do not even come near them.

[Stumpy]

Yeah it is. There's a nice maid working in that place... I watch her hanging out the washing.

Note to self....Binoculars....

[Mendip]

My last Covid test, and fish an' chips for lunch. The perfect opportunity to celebrate with the last of my peas.

I must admit I'm quite proud of meself making my jar of peas last until Day 11. I guess in times of adversity the real character shines through.

Fifteen chips as well. What a day!



'Zebby' has taken to popping in now and again to say hello, and she came by for lunch. Ya don't get that at yer fancy Centrepoints and Landmarks!



Having spent the last six months in Europe I'd kind of got used to things making sense and being normal. This time spent in ASQ is readying me for life back in Thailand.

My hosts leave me continually bemused... having eventually organised my first bottle of milk I've settled into the routine of ordering one bottle 'from outside' every 3 or 4 days for my tea and coffee. Every time it has been one of those small 400ml bottles. Yesterday I was running low so ordered another bottle to see me through to Saturday... same girl at reception, same instructions. This morning I was delivered a 2 litre bottle of milk... with 4 days to go. Life in Thailand is all coming back to me.

But I'm still really happy today. The time is flying and I've had another good result. I was re-packing my bag after lunch, sticking any cold weather gear to the bottom, and came across a pair of sandals. I'd completely forgotten about them... bought them online back in August and had them delivered to my mum's house. When I visited her back in September I must have stuffed them into the bottom of my bag, and then just forgot.

I have a lot of problems getting decent footwear in Thailand but buying online is always a lottery. Anyway, I stuck these sandals on and they immediately felt just perfect... right size and comfy AF... fit like a glove. I'm gonna spend this afternoon trying to get another identical pair, then I should be covered for a few years.

I'm breaking them in walking around my room... it may seem odd just wearing boxer shorts and sandals, but that's the wonderful thing about ASQ... no-one knows!

[Stumpy]

but that's the wonderful thing about ASQ... no-one knows!

But now we do and I sadly now have this really bad image burned in my retina. I may never be the same.

[Iceman123]

^^
Don’t you just hate it when they screw up the tiling. Every tile in the room has been laid stackbond except the ones around the edges.
I would definitely kick up shit and request a change of room!

[Headworx]

^^^Really should be socks worn with them or they're not the panty-dropper you may expect.

[Mendip]

But now we do and I sadly now have this really bad image burned in my retina. I may never be the same.

Well JP, I'm sorry about that.

Guess who's gonna be doing a bit of 'au naterel' sunbathing on the balcony this afternoon... apart from my new sandals of course!

Unburn that from yer retina!

[lom]

I watch her hanging out the washing.

She touched herself while you were out for the PCR test.

[Mendip]

^^^Really should be socks worn with them or they're not the panty-dropper you may expect.

No socks HW... these will look the bollocks with a pair of jeans and a nice shirt.

Roll on Saturday!

[strigils]

I'm breaking them in walking around my room.

You need your socks on or else the cracked skin will act like a cheese grater and you'll wear out the lining, you are English and socks are to be expected so you'll get away with it.

[Bogon]

Wearing them sandals might give you the power to turn water into wine.

They did say that Jesus would come in a different form.

The second coming is upon us.

[Headworx]

^^Jesus Christ you should have a warning sign attached to your neck when you get let loose onto lower Sukhumvit soon

Genuine question (for once) but how do you think your dogs will go when you eventually sober up and head home? Seen a complitation video recently of owners getting home after long periods away and it was common for them to be really wary, scared, or even hostile till getting the scent and at that point they'd go crazy with joy.

[Mendip]

FFS guys, they're not Jesus boots, they are proper sandals. Like proper shoes but with some ventilation.


That's a very good question HW and something I've been pondering over.

The longest I've been away before was about 3 months one time, but that was when we only had our original dogs, Dan and her now deceased brother Den. My daughter was a toddler back then.

Dan's over 14 now, her eyesight is poor and she's going deaf, but once she realises that it's me I think she will go mental, running in circles and yelping for a while, I'll get a good lick and then she'll immediately run down to the back gate hoping for a walk... she always does that. I have a very close bond with Dan... she was very sick years ago and slept on the bed, back when the Commandant allowed the dogs in the house.

Coco I'm not sure about... she only turned up last April, so we'd only been together 3 months before I left, and now I've been away 6 months. I think she'll be very nervous at first and will take a while to come around.

The three boys are my worry. I'm sure after initial wariness they'll come up to say hello, but my return will upset the pack dynamic and most probably a fight will ensue. They'll get jealous and vie for my attention. I'll get the wife to separate the boys into different parts of the garden before I arrive so I can let each one greet me unhampered. I think that will be the best solution to avoid an all out fight. I've found it's important to fuss each dog in the order of his pack position to avoid too much jealousy upsetting the balance. But all said and done, I've never been away this long before and I'm not sure what will happen. I really can't wait to catch up with them all again.

Meanwhile things have got a bit weird here... I was out on the balcony, reading my book while stark bollock naked in the sun (apart from my proper sandals) when I had this feeling I was being watched. I looked up and...



I seem to have bonded with a zebra dove. She won't leave me alone... she chatted away and then jumped down and was walking around cooing. I've never known anything like this before.

[David48atTD]

^ She knows you're leaving her soon and making her move.

Unless she's a covid nurse bird and 'she' is male dove

[Stumpy]

I was out on the balcony, reading my book while stark bollock naked in the sun (apart from my proper sandals)

I was just starting to not feel woozy then ^ this post

I had to grab a beer and go out by the pool for some therapy. Not sure I can drink enough to get rid of that all natural with Jesus boots on with a dove watching you image..... Something seems terribly wrong here.

[nidhogg]

We have Zebra doves round my way - they have to be the easiest bird in the world to capture- totally not spooked by humans. Given that, I have always assumed they are inedible.

[cyrille]

Hey JP, do you wax?

Quite a change from Mendip's legs, which I always expect to end in cloven hooves.

[Mendip]

FFS... the compliments fly round here!

I've got men's legs mate.

[Edmond]

FFS... the compliments fly round here!

I've got men's legs mate.

Just as well, as they have to carry 150kg of disgusting flab around the place.

[Stumpy]

Hey JP, do you wax?

Quite a change from Mendip's legs, which I always expect to end in cloven hooves.

No I don't, I was born a blond hair (well showing gray now) blue eyed virtually no hair on my body type.

I wasn't going to mention anything about Mendips Gorilla hair and Cankles but....

Sorry Mendy..

[bsnub]

Quite a change from Mendip's legs, which I always expect to end in cloven hooves.

[Mendip]

No problem.

I think it's good that someone knows what gender you are just by looking at your legs.

I wouldn't swap my masculine body for hairless legs and slender ankles. We're just not like that in Somerset.

[David48atTD]

(Men) are just not like that in Somerset.

Somerset, where men are men and the sheep are worried ...

... or is that New Zealand ?

[Stumpy]

I have been drinking since Mendips first comment about his all natural comment and I just can't seem to drink it away. ��



It's a Tuesday at about 4:30 and it's going to take 2 or 5 more.

Hey Mendy. I am hoping that they come in and basically take all the furnishings and burn them after you leave. That would be the most sanitary thing to do.