I had a few pet sloths over the years, quite easy to keep, they are. They are the worlds slowest animals, in many cases these beasts get covered in green algae during the rainy seasons in the jungle due to their complete inactivity.
Anyway I've adopted two in my time, and this is about one of them, Sammy the Sloth. He meets this Thai chick on the internet, and they meet in Bangkok, Sammy is skint, but she still falls in love with him. Trouble is, Sammy knows nothing about Thai culture, having never attended a school.
This girl, Noi, whom he met online, is quite rich and well connected. Her dad made his millions teaching begging techniques to amputees, he totally cornered the market. Now these beggars make a good living on the street at a 5% commision to Nois dad.
He tries splitting up with her many times but she's still obsessed, and she convinces him to get married, (with the aid of the threat of violence from her dad) and he thinks he's happy.
Wedded bliss?...Despite Noi's showbiz pals meaning well, Sammy could never fit in with them
Meanwhile he's also sending cash back to me in London, as my buffalo was sick, and had to have a double hernia op, so all the money came in handy.
In the end he commited suicide by sneaking into the lion enclosure at Dusit Zoo, Bangkok. It took the Thai lions two days to realise he was there, but just as the biggest lion was about to decapitate Sammy, a lioness took a likeness to him......