Primitive animal (Aussie) neighbour wants to kill me.

**larvidchr** · 16-06-2009, 02:01 PM

Extract from e-mail from my crazy Aussie neighbour:

PS. Larse Now has taken it........ apon himself, to pulling, the Sand Bags, out. He is to stupid, to realize, that there is a drain were the water goes out, anyhow. (His side, of the Bags) If this sort of behaviour continues, somebody could get killed.

Amazing! in all my life I have never before had a conflict with a neighbour, now I have one that no matter what I do don't seem to want to go away. This guy gets nasty when he has had 2 beers, I don't know if it is his former rugby career or what but not only does he spew profanities at everybody but he also thinks he is superman when he is drunk! he has alienated himself from almost all his former friends and golfing buddies in the estate because of his foul temper and language

In 4 years here he has countless times called me (and others) names like "fucking idiot" and told me/us to "shut the fuck up" not in a friendly banter way but with frothing anger and rage, he has the last year three times in front of witnesses threatened me with violence, mostly I have ignored him, but the times with the threats I have asked him to put his fists where his mouth is which usually makes him stomp angrily away.

The reason for the last couple of months sharply raised tension between us is flooding, and his last threat was " I'll put your fucking head into a drain pipe" continued with "are you an idiot" repeated 3 times at the top of his voice and in front of a few other Neighbours.
This time I could feel my blood starting to boil and I knew that he had after all the years of mouthing off reached my limit of patience, as it happened (shows what a total ignoramus he is) next morning he boldly as brass walked in on my porch talking to another neighbour sitting having coffee with me, when I came out from the kitchen and saw him my anger from the day before came up straight away and I grabbed him by the arm and took him outside my property, told him that I have had it with him calling me "fucking idiot" and his threats, I warned him to stay away from me in the future.

In fairness he has got a flooding problem, but his solution is to block the public road and all the drains with sandbags wich in turn have moved the flooding problem to me, I have never before had problems with flooding.

Now I have asked him friendly if he could not put the sandbags in front of his house but he has categorically refused he wanted to flood the estate office next to my home, in the end he conceded to make a hole in the middle about 30 centimetres wide to allow the water to run to working drains on the other side of the bags.
So I naively thought we had a gentleman's agreement, but I was wrong, next big rain all the bags where out again.

This is what it looks like at my house now- while it is bone dry at his end, before the sandbags it used to be the other way round, while I totally sympathise with his problem, I hardly think it fair that he just passes the problem on to others by illegally blocking the public road with his sandbag wall when he could just put the bags in front of his own house leaving the drains and road free.

With my carport being flooded and the cars sending tidal waves up against my front porch, when the rainwater subsides a lot of shit is left everywhere.

To be continued with the "fight/showdown" and the death threat e-mail-

**Moonraker** · 16-06-2009, 02:09 PM

Looks as though he is making a little dam.

**panama hat** · 16-06-2009, 02:42 PM

Is this the guy you gave a black eye and some cracked ribs to?

He sounds like a right prick . . . pretty much an unenviable and hopeless situation. Are there any friends of his you could talk to?

(Rugby player? League, I bet)

**baldrick** · 16-06-2009, 02:49 PM

buy some sandbags

watterinja · 16-06-2009, 03:01 PM

Looks like you folks need to put your homes on stilts.

**larvidchr** · 16-06-2009, 03:02 PM

Originally Posted by panama hat

Is this the guy you gave a black eye and some cracked ribs to?

He sounds like a right prick . . . pretty much an unenviable and hopeless situation. Are there any friends of his you could talk to?

(Rugby player? League, I bet)

Yes that's the man, and no he has got no friends left that I know of around here.

**Jack meoff** · 16-06-2009, 03:03 PM

Originally Posted by larvidchr

Primitive animal (Aussie) neighbour wants to kill me.

I thought you and Loy toy were mates Larv?

**larvidchr** · 16-06-2009, 03:07 PM

Originally Posted by baldrick

buy some sandbags

And change the name of the estate to "Somme" or what ? any other suggestions with association to trench warfare

**davearn** · 16-06-2009, 03:11 PM

Get a pump and hose and pump all the water back over the sand bags....

**Loy Toy** · 16-06-2009, 03:12 PM

As i advised before mate there are communal laws set up and controlled by the juristic person.

You metioned to me that this nominated person is just trying to keep the peace and he/she is failing miserably.

This guy is a wanker of the highest order and I am ashamed that he is an aussie but by rights the problem never ever should of come your way in the first place (flooding problem and the moron).

The juristic person is there to handle these matters and he/she is obviously not doing what it was paid to do.

A lesson to all and that is to check your rights and the laws when you move into a mooban or village.

I know in your case you went out of your way to solve things diplomatically and without violence and the stupid aussie pushed it too far and coped a hiding which was thoroughly deserved.

**larvidchr** · 16-06-2009, 03:13 PM

Originally Posted by Jack meoff

Originally Posted by larvidchr

Primitive animal (Aussie) neighbour wants to kill me.

I thought you and Loy toy were mates Larv?

I tell you the good LT have saved the reputation of Aussies at least with me, before I met LT I had started to believe that all Aussies was slightly odd and somewhat primitive, we had another one here on the estate who is thankfully dead now and he was a right piece of weird work to, he walked in to a British neighbour and demanded that his garden figurine with exposed breasts was either turned around or covered up because it was indecent

**dirtydog** · 16-06-2009, 03:16 PM

AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE
OI OI OI

Must make other Aussies proud to be Australian

**Johnny Longprong** · 16-06-2009, 03:37 PM

Slow learner probably. Whack him again and repeat as necessary.

**larvidchr** · 16-06-2009, 03:49 PM

Originally Posted by Johnny Longprong

Slow learner probably. Whack him again and repeat as necessary.

I have invited him face to face for round two, but he seems to think e-mail death threats is his best course of action by now, he has apparently turned in to more of a keyboard warrior

maybe he has French blood somewhere in his ancestry and not only British convict blood.

I will let you have a look for your self maybe you can see if there is something suspicious in his blood

**Nawty** · 16-06-2009, 04:06 PM

Start a fish farm and make him jealous.

**larvidchr** · 16-06-2009, 04:25 PM

A couple of weeks ago the guy came walking up to my home with his dog, he started talking to me about all the arrangements he had made to take care of the flooding problems, this despite I have warned him to stay away from me (mostly for my own sake) I controlled my self and asked him very quietly why he did not honour our agreement to remove just a few sacks to allow a slow run of water to the drains on his side.

He went absolutely ballistic in a millisecond, again the "fucking idiot" was flowing from him like the Niagra falls and with the same volume of noise.

Here I have to be perfectly honest with you my fellow TD posters, I boiled over, I walked to my carport fence and asked him if I had not warned him not to call me names again, he in turn almost ran over to me from the centre of the road shouting "fucking something or other" and to tell you the truth when he got within arms reach I popped him so he went straight on his ass with a bleeding cut under his left eye.

I know it was wrong

but I have totally lost my patience with this man.

Anyhow the guy collected himself from the concrete and proceeded to charge at my carport gate which he tore of the rollers and the guide to get at me, I was waiting for him a yard or so inside and grabbed him by the ears as he came storming at me, I turned him over in the air (superman was flying for a second, hope it made him happy

) and slammed him to the ground with his back first, he hit my car on the way down and apparently damaged his ribs while crash-landing. I grabbed his throat let the air out of him, and when he was limp handed him over to the estate guards who by that time had arrived to the scene. I was sorely tempted to pop him a couple of extras as he lay there but I guess old habits die hard so I did not do it.

My car-

Flightpath

Aussie ? blood

Is there any French traces there ??, or is it just normal British convict remnants

**Nawty** · 16-06-2009, 04:29 PM

You flipped him by his ears ??

Fuck he must have big ears.

Are you related to Steven Seagel ?

Are you responsible for Carradines death ?

Do you know anything about Carradines death ?

Whats the password to the secret ninja theme park ?

**good2bhappy** · 16-06-2009, 04:36 PM

Originally Posted by Nawty

Are you related to Steven Seagel ?

he is steven seagel

watterinja · 16-06-2009, 04:37 PM

Hagar, you're a hero...

**larvidchr** · 16-06-2009, 04:41 PM

Originally Posted by Nawty

You flipped him by his ears ??

Fuck he must have big ears.

Are you related to Steven Seagel ?

Are you responsible for Carradines death ?

Do you know anything about Carradines death ?

Whats the password to the secret ninja theme park ?

Yes all 90 kilograms of him, a small lady could do it if you know how, it's all about using your opponents momentum and disrupting his sense of balance which you do by sharply turning the head at the same time , Aikido mate

part of my previous job training through 20 years.

You dont need the ears just grab the head, or a handful of hair behind the back of the head and the jaw with the other.

As the rest goes- not guilty

watterinja · 16-06-2009, 04:45 PM

Replace with Aussie head, as appropriate.

**larvidchr** · 16-06-2009, 04:46 PM

Originally Posted by watterinja

Hagar, you're a hero...

No I am so shit sorry, but really do not know what I could have done to avoid this, if you cant be left alone in your home what do you do then?

It is really sad and embarrassing, old gits fighting but the man just don't want to leave me alone

watterinja · 16-06-2009, 04:49 PM

It seems like you did your absolute level best to avoid an incident.

The man invaded your privacy & property & got what he deserved. No-one will ever hold that against you, you did what needed doing.

**larvidchr** · 16-06-2009, 04:54 PM

Originally Posted by watterinja

It seems like you did your absolute level best to avoid an incident.

The man invaded your privacy & property & got what he deserved. No-one will ever hold that against you, you did what needed doing.

Thanks

**Butterfly** · 16-06-2009, 05:00 PM

you must be a big fucker,

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