Who's been piss tested by the rozzers?

**The Zapster** · 02-06-2009, 01:11 AM

I often hear people say some bar or other has been raided by the filth, with the patrons urine tested.

Has anyone ever had to do this?

**Mr Brown** · 02-06-2009, 02:19 AM

Would you grab a ladyboys cock to piss in your cup if you'd taken drugs and he hadn't zapster?

**dirtydog** · 02-06-2009, 03:49 AM

Of course he would, he's from that part of the UK.

**nedwalk** · 02-06-2009, 05:19 AM

sounds like any part of the UK

**withnallstoke** · 02-06-2009, 06:17 AM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

Of course he would, he's from that part of the UK.

Cumbria - Cockermouth?

**kingwilly** · 02-06-2009, 07:23 AM

Originally Posted by The Zapster

Has anyone ever had to do this?

yup.

Originally Posted by Mr Brown

Would you grab a ladyboys cock to piss in your cup if you'd taken drugs and he hadn't zapster?

nope. but I have been asked to share urine also.

**mrsquirrel** · 02-06-2009, 03:06 PM

Originally Posted by kingwilly

but I have been asked to share urine also.

WE DRINK PISS

**The Zapster** · 02-06-2009, 03:38 PM

Originally Posted by Mr Brown

Would you grab a ladyboys cock to piss in your cup if you'd taken drugs and he hadn't zapster?

Of course. Wouldn't you?

**kingwilly** · 02-06-2009, 03:47 PM

Originally Posted by mrsquirrel

Originally Posted by kingwilly

but I have been asked to share urine also.

WE DRINK PISS

no.

i poured half my clean piss into an empty cup for someone else needing some...

**dirtydog** · 02-06-2009, 03:50 PM

^Fellow TEFLer was he

**kingwilly** · 02-06-2009, 03:56 PM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

^Fellow TEFLer was he

nah, hot looking farang bird.

**isdatu** · 02-06-2009, 04:55 PM

Slightly off topic, but it brought to mind a story I overheard a little while back. Apparently now in Oz to qualify for a bus drivers license you had to at some time produce a urine sample. They also do random tests for Govt. bus drivers as well as a breath test every start of shift to check for alcohol. Same with train drivers.
The guy got tipped off by the receptionist in the office that the officials (for want of a better word) would be on the job, early the the following morning to do a random sweep of all drivers.

This chap has been known to enjoy a herbal cigarette on his days off in the privacy of his own home. He realises that his urine sample will have traces of THC found in it, so he hatches a plan. Caution, genius at work. He takes a condom full of his brothers piss to work concealed in his jacket. (what..... do you just ask your brother "oh by the way could you fill this up at your earliest convenience")?????

O.K so the 'test' sqaud appear at the bus-depot, at 5am the next morning. He avails himself the use of the small smoko room to fill his wee jar in privacy. He presents it to the team who chat amongst themselves before handing him back the cup. They state that they are suspicious of the sample as it was not of 'body temperature' and that the would require a new sample.

Stupid guy goes back into the room, throw the sample in the staff room micro-wave for a few seconds then back out to the crew.
Well apparently the sample was almost the temp. of a cup of coffee. The testers went ballistic, claiming that he was trying to treat them like a pack of fools etc.

He now is back working as a brickie

**The Zapster** · 02-06-2009, 06:49 PM

Originally Posted by kingwilly

Originally Posted by mrsquirrel

Originally Posted by kingwilly

but I have been asked to share urine also.

WE DRINK PISS

no.

i poured half my clean piss into an empty cup for someone else needing some...

So, there isn't a policeman in the bog to supervise that sort of thing?

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Who's been piss tested by the rozzers?

He's so stupid if a sparrow had his brains it would fly sideways

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