Thread: Safety Starts With Me!

What could be simpler and safer than going to the mailbox to get the mail...

Well, it can be more hazardous than you anticipate

And I busted my headlight. But thankful for small mercies the scooter still scoots.

I would not qualify for one of Mendip's new work hoodies and I may revise my gloveless scootering habits...

Although I was wearing steel toe boots, to my credit...

There wasn't even any fookin mail!

I'd laugh bit did exactly the same thing a Baltic Marina recently jumping from boat onto a gravel hard.

Get well soon Loopy, A hot male of course could delegate to rummageing in the box to Miss Asia '24?

^It was a serious injury. One of those injuries that leaves you feeling physically shaken for 24 hours afterwards. Your body instinctively knows when it needs to retreat into deep repair mode and puts you on notice that you need to rest up.


I sent out SMS messages seeking skin graft donors and FF2 pocket rocket was on the next train down from Brisbane

She brought mysterious meats from Sichuan which are spicy and sweet and a bag of fortune cookies featuring exquisitely painted dragons and inscrutable totems.

Also for steaming was brown bamboo and pork. The first time I have ever eaten bamboo to my knowledge. I read somewhere recently that it contains cyanide I think, and must be cooked very carefully so I placed my life in her hands.

She got to work in the kitchen while I tended to my suppurating wounds

She knocked up a kingly feast which included noodle soup and more sushi selections

I sliced up the sushi while she mixed the wound-healing wasabi

And I made a decent dent in the selection of fortune cookies for pudding to extract all their mystical healing powers

Then it was time to figure out what this throbbing and vibrating device was for.

Turns out it is not a sex toy but a general massager which turns out to have a mighty powerful reciprocating motor. So I entertained her by singing 'You are my sunshine' with my voice vibrating to the rhythm. She copied each line after I sang it in her delightfully incomprehensible English mimicry style.

From tits up to noodle soothing I think you are in good hands

"general massager" she told you.

Originally Posted by Looper

I would not qualify for one of Mendip's new work hoodies and I may revise my gloveless scootering habits...

If you can fit into a 'huge' medium, you're more than welcome to it. I think the wife would prefer a bottle of duty free perfume for her Birthday, anyway.

Originally Posted by Looper

I sent out SMS messages seeking skin graft donors

I can donate a piece of arse skin if you like? It looks like your baby-smooth legs could do with some proper hair.

^


Hey Looper, speaking from experience, you will be better off keeping the wounds on your hand flexible by using antiseptic cream constantly.

If they get dry and scabby, when you flex them (as you invariably will), the edges of the scabs will separate from the surrounding skin, which is painful, and healing at the edges will have to begin again.

JFC flexing your legs? Why not just say move them.


Or valve them?

Don't do that here in this thread, Willy.

Originally Posted by Salsa dancer

the wounds on your hand flexible

Not legs.

Originally Posted by harrybarracuda

"general massager" she told you.

That is what I was led to believe by FF2. I have not had a chance to peruse AliExpress X-Rated section yet to establish the veracity of this assertion of innocence.

Originally Posted by Mendip

I can donate a piece of arse skin if you like? It looks like your baby-smooth legs could do with some proper hair.

I have been puzzled for years by my bi-valent hirsuteness. The outer side of my calves are smooth and hairless but the inner side are hairy (although that is obviously a relative term in present company!) so a Mendip skin graft could be just the ticket.

Originally Posted by Salsa dancer

Hey Looper, speaking from experience, you will be better off keeping the wounds on your hand flexible by using antiseptic cream constantly.

This is a conundrum. I have been keeping the patches of skinless flesh under cover with antiseptic and bandages. But a bona fide doctor once told me that you should stop using antiseptic as soon as risk of infection has passed since it it inhibits the regrowth of the missing skin tissue. But she did not specify exactly how you know by what point in time this risk has passed.

I googled whether you should clean the grey green slime off the wound while you are changing the dressing, and the online consensus was: yes, as it is mainly dead white blood cells and live bacteria. I was worried that the slime might be the regeneration taking place and I could be scuppering it.


Anyway we hobbled down to the beach today to build up my strength.

There is something romantic about lighthouses so I thought this might put a twinkle in her eye.

NSW stretching away to Byron Bay in the south where the proper lighthouse is.

I lost my horizon skills in my eaglish eagerness to snap this apex feathered predator

We found an eagles nest of our own to perch in and devour our picnic

And watched the dolphins leaping and spinning

A magical rainbow appeared pointing directly to the island pot'o'gold so I might take a paddle out there in the canoe with my new toy (a metal detector) next time.

These 2 fellas were lucky to get across the causeway without getting washed off

This 50 footer was making some pace into the wind with just its mainsail unfurled

We spotted the eagle having a rest on our way back to the car-park

I decided a hot bath was the thing to sooth my suppurations

FF2 was game enough to share the suppurating bath water with me at great risk of personal infection.

So we wrapped it up with 2 bowls of my finest Tom Yam

And 2 peppermint Magnums for good measure

If ever there was a photo to declare the best place in the world to live.

Originally Posted by Looper

And watched the dolphins leaping and spinning

You're just pulling the pith now.

Glorious pictures again, Looper (apart from the exfoliated, moisturised and ladyshaved legs you have).

Ladyshave Loops.

Yes lovely pix, living the ,,,,CREAM?

Originally Posted by Looper

I have been puzzled for years by my bi-valent hirsuteness.

It looks nice when you're wearing high heels

Originally Posted by Salsa dancer

Don't do that here in this thread, Willy.




Not legs.

Yet again intentionally missing the point to avoid answering.

Hands or legs is irrelevant. People move them, not flex. Though you are trying hard to flex but failing miserably.

It's in very poor taste to troll me here. Or are you just incredibly thick ? Read again :

"If they (the wounds) get dry and scabby, when you flex them (the wounds) (as you invariably will), the edges of the scabs will separate from the surrounding skin, which is painful, and healing at the edges will have to begin again".

I didn't say his hands would flex. Wounds and scabs flex. That's what I said. Got it ?



That's Fingal Head lighthouse, isn't it Looper ? It's very quaint.

Goodness me, not every post you disagree with is trolling.

I am not disagreeing with you. What is happening here is that you have failed to focus on the subject of my sentence, which is Looper's hand wound / upcoming scab. I said nothing about his leg, but you obsessed about it as if I said something about it.

You have been purposely obtuse, and now you appear to be deflecting away from your failure.

Talk about obtuse, hand or leg is irrelevant but yet again you focus on that because you know you’re a valve gate twit.

Ah, but here is what is relevant. I was talking about wounds / scabs, and they do flex.

Other than a man bag over the shoulder, there’s nothing more poofterish than a chap propelling himself on a fucking scooter like a mincing queen.

Let this be a lesson.

^And mine has a pink front tyre which makes it dubbly bubbly gay

I generally restrict my scootering to out of the public gaze along my driveway but when the fruity urge takes me I have been known to scooter along the beach front promenade with gay abandon


Nothing like starting the day with some steamed bamboo for regeneration energies.

We headed down to the preview showing of the beach sculpture festival

FF2 is an art teacher by profession

So she was able to cast a critical gaze upon the offerings on show

My favourite was this flying fish airplane

With a little robot humanoid pilot

It was back to normal chilly September weather so FF2 was staying wrapped up beside the sun worshipper