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  1. #1
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    DonKiddick's Avatar
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    Tricky Songkran Situation

    So here's the deal.

    Today, the wife and daughter left to Nakhorn Nowhere for a week and number 1 son left for a week to Hua Hin/Khon Kaen (depending on who you ask) for a week.

    All good so far BUT

    All pubs, bars and massage places are now closed

    And double BUT

    The maid is only going to be coming on Monday to clean up my shit.

    So this curtails my plans a fair amount, so what I am thinking.


    • Stuff myself till Sunday morning - massively overeat, so that I don't have to eat for a few days and can therefore avoid washing dishes
    • Get onto Grab delivery food on Wed PM - timing it so the following formula applies Empty Carton Space < (Kitchen bin + Living Room Bin + Kitchen Sink). Focus will be on places that deliver plastic cutlery too, obviously
    • Subscribe to some sort of IPTV service, so that I can sit downstairs and watch pornography in a civilized manner (kids don't like me doing this in the living room, when they are there)
    • Throw all food out of the fridge and replace it with Leo
    • Get plastic cups from 7-11, but re-use 1 a day because global warming whatever
    • Take all pillows off the bed except mine - put that in the middle and have a bolster either side I can starfish my legs across both


    I think that pretty much has me covered for a moderately enjoyable wife-free week considering the closures mean I can't get on the miliking table at Analiese.

    Any thoughts on how to make this better? I'm not used to this closure shit.

    Don

  2. #2
    Thailand Expat OhOh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DonKiddick View Post
    I'm not used to this closure shit.
    Make sure you close your curtains and mark off the days on the calander.

  3. #3
    Thailand Expat tomcat's Avatar
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    ...diapers to cut down on toilet interruptions...
    ...room deodorizers to reduce shower requirements...
    ...handy battery replacements for the remote...

  4. #4
    Thailand Expat OhOh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DonKiddick View Post
    massage places are now closed
    A number of quality masseurs mobile numbers can be a comfort.

  5. #5
    I am not a cat
    nidhogg's Avatar
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    Lock the door, and check into a decent hotel for a few days.

    Just be home before the wife.

  6. #6
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    Now is your chance to play all your records/cd's out loud, so empty the fridge and fill it with Leo.

  7. #7
    Thailand Expat Saint Willy's Avatar
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    Don’t forgot to post on teakdoor

  8. #8
    Thailand Expat Pragmatic's Avatar
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    Why not go with der wife?

  9. #9
    Thailand Expat lom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pragmatic View Post
    Why not go with der wife?
    and forsake his only opportunity for some me-time? tell me you are joking

  10. #10
    Days Work Done! Norton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DonKiddick View Post
    All pubs, bars and massage places are now closed
    Come to Roi Et. All open here.

  11. #11
    Thailand Expat Saint Willy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Norton View Post
    Come to Roi Et. All open here.
    That's actually an attractive proposition.

  12. #12
    Thailand Expat tomcat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheRealKW View Post
    That's actually an attractive proposition
    ...agree, except for the Roi Et part...

  13. #13
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    Well - it got worse.

    And I swear this is true. I was relying on the Maid coming tomorrow - but her mother died and so she won't be coming in. Sort of inconsiderate to not wait till Tuesday IMO.

    So I've just been into the kitchen to do something other than raid the fridge. I washed the dishes.

    Will my hands stay wrinkly like this forever now?

    I also now have to review the underpants situation too - as no laundry tomorrow either.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by deeks View Post
    Now is your chance to play all your records/cd's out loud, so empty the fridge and fill it with Leo.
    I am the master of this castle, mate - I play what I want, when I want, as loud as I want.

    Obviously - with headphones off, so the wife doesn't shout at me.

  15. #15
    Thailand Expat Saint Willy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DonKiddick View Post
    Well - it got worse.

    And I swear this is true. I was relying on the Maid coming tomorrow - but her mother died and so she won't be coming in. Sort of inconsiderate to not wait till Tuesday IMO.

    So I've just been into the kitchen to do something other than raid the fridge. I washed the dishes.

    Will my hands stay wrinkly like this forever now?

    I also now have to review the underpants situation too - as no laundry tomorrow either.
    Frontways
    backways
    inside out front ways
    inside out backways

    4 date each pair

  16. #16
    Thailand Expat Fondles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DonKiddick View Post


    I also now have to review the underpants situation too - as no laundry tomorrow either.

    Learn to clean your arse properly.

  17. #17
    Days Work Done! Norton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tomcat View Post
    ...agree, except for the Roi Et part...
    Tricky Songkran Situation-dont-knock-till-you-try-jpg

  18. #18
    Isle of discombobulation Joe 90's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheRealKW View Post
    Don’t forgot to post on teakdoor
    I concur

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