Originally Posted by
YourDaddy
Once I had a true love, but through my own stupidity and insecurity I let her go.
I met her exactly a year ago on Tinder.
I still can't get over her and I am sure I never will.
I know it sounds pathetic and this is exactly why I am posting it on Teakdoor.
The first day I met her it was totally innocent. We went running in the park and I took her for a small dinner. The next date was at her restaurant near her condo in Ekkamai. She was very reluctant, but at the end of the night she asked me to stay at her place.
Since then it only got better.
First she demanded I order bigger condoms on the internet.
Once during sex she told me to slap her if I can't get my dick hard. I felt weird.... and I felt like an abusive individual..... but I did it anyway. She was right. I got rock hard. After sex she just sat on the bed naked and told me to slap her again. She told me I need to practice this as I have obviously never done it before. So, I slapped her like a bitch. It was a bit hard, so she got up and pouted all night. I thought she was going to leave me. The next day she gave me keys to her condo.
We went to see Annabelle Comes Home. The movie was kinda boring, so she put her hands inside my pants and started jerking me off. I didn't cum, but it was a sign of things to cum.
Then the insults started.
The next day she started with her head games. She would get angry about the smallest things and just lash out at me for no reason. I felt like a pussy..... but it felt so good!!!!!
It got so bad, or should I say so good that every time there was a notification on my phone I would get a mini heart attack as she would go apeshit in case my ex wife was texting me. She would come back from work at night in a filthy mood. We broke up 5 times and many times she kicked me out of her place. Afterwards we would have sex and she would say things like "Fuck me, I am a whore" or "You are fucking a bad girl".
I remember clearly after one such fight she jumped on my cock and after a few minutes demanded "Fuck me in the ass". I could not believe what I was hearing as she knew damn well this is not my thing. However, you really could not say no to a person like this. You just want to please or else. So I pleased if only for a few minutes until my dick started bleeding. She said "are you ok?", but I knew she wasn't sincere and she didn't give a fuck.
During one of many breakups she kicked me out and blocked me from Line. I got fed up and went out with a super nice lawyer girl on a date. The thing is.... all I could think about was my mentally abusive (ex) girlfriend. During the date I kept looking at her line account hoping she would unblock me. I literally kept looking every 5 minutes and ignoring my date. She did unblock me and as soon as I noticed I messaged her. I got back with her the next day.
One day she was driving me to Patterz and told me.... you know I do all this for a reason. I treat you like shit because I love you. Guys don't like boring girls, they like girls like me. Thinking back she was so right. Now I am married again to a nice girl, she treats me like a king and kisses me on the cheek before she goes to work, but there is sumthink missing and that thing is my one and forever Schizo girl.
This year I am turning 47 and spent a year looking for something like her.
I have no fucking idea what to do with the rest of my life.