What's the strangest thing you've brought home with you after a night out?
What's the strangest thing you've brought home with you after a night out?
Off the top of my head...
Woke up with a black cat in my bedroom
A cardboard cut-out of Marc Marquez
A traffic Island bollard
A pikey
A 'warning jellyfish' flag
A shopping trolly
A poodle.
A cat.
a loverly lady from the marine bar,patts.1985and i am not a hansum man.
An infection dose of one sort or another....
Several strange things I've brought home over the years.
I woke up with a hobby horse after May day celebrations in Padstow. No idea how it got there, I swear I brought back a fair maiden.
Woke up to find a traffic light in my room when I was at uni. No idea what happened the night before apart from the evening "spin-a-bottle" party.
Woke up in the tub in Atlanta covered in chocolate and strawberry ice-cream. I couldn't move, thought I was paralysed for several frightful moments. Delicious memories of the previous night and later in the afternoon. Didn't leave apartment for 3 days.
Soi cat
A WPC, i thought it was a bird i'd picked up in a fancy dress party but nope, she was the real deal fuzz and had to convince me by showing her warrant; went on for two months.
A parrot which i'd liberated from the dumbpost inn, they used to a have a few of them perched around and cages for various birds outside. It clearly wasn't happy as both my hands, my chest and neck got beaked badly - thing is back then i only had a motorcycle so i must have stashed it down my jacket. I decide to confess the next day, returned it swaddled in a towel. The landlord made me clean all the cages out.
3 Koi carp and a turtle in a bucket and to this day i have no idea where i found them or the bucket but i do know where i nicked the golf cart that was parked on the front lawn, that was from Bowood House.
A Danish Navy bicycle, which was transported back to UK courtesy of RAF Hercules.
A petrol driven cement mixer, because no taxis were available.
Outstanding
A traffic cone
A pair of knickers
A pint glass
Somebody else's trousers
A raunchy kiwi doctor from Otago. My mum was not as impressed as I was, but managed to keep a straight face at breakfast.
A church
As in, the whole congregation?
Withnallstoke
^
most would consider hepatitis C, crabs and HPV to be more strange, but....
Back when I was working in Geoje Island, South Korea, the company went cheap on us and moved us to an apartment block miles from anywhere. The nearest pub was just walkable at a push but started off with an incredibly long and steep hill. There was no real strategy to tackle this bastard, just had to get it done then have a rest at the top until you stopped breathing out of your arse.
One night we were in the bar and this Indian wanker I worked with got pissed and started pushing for a fight. We had a bit of a scuffle and the other lads broke it up. I headed home leaving the rest of them there. When I got to the top of the hill there was a scooter parked there so I jumped on it and freewheeled all the way home and parked it in the car park. Then I went inside and done things to that guy's toothbrush that should never be spoken of.
The scooter sat there for about a year and it was still there when I left for the last time.
Lang may yer lum reek...
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