Saw this in the rag: https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/102071...station-court/
"He was in a public lift with the upturned object — described as “akin to a traffic cone” — on his lap. Cops arrived to see Smith on top of it with his pants still down.
Smith, who had been on a drink and drugs bender, said his trousers had simply “fallen down”.
But one of the Virgin Rail workers at Wigan North Western station said: “I believe he was trying to have sex with the cone. I was in complete shock.”
Smith, of St Helens, Merseyside, ad[at]mitted outraging public decency in April before Wigan magistrates.
A Bolton crown court sentencing hearing was told he has eight previous convictions, included two for public sex acts.
But Gareth Bellis, defending, said he had been offered a plumbing job, which was dependent on avoiding jail."
I'm sure his new job working with piping will provide a safe outlet for his interests....