Christmas Cheers

**Chittychangchang** · 17-12-2017, 05:26 AM

Tree's up and a few pressies to wet their appetite, lost an arm and a leg today..maybe it's wrapped up

**Luigi** · 17-12-2017, 05:41 AM

It's pretty small

**Luigi** · 17-12-2017, 05:43 AM

Put mine up today.

**tomcat** · 17-12-2017, 06:33 AM

...just in case you didn't click on the link I posted earlier:

You Can Now Buy A Chocolate Mold Of Your Partner’s Anus (Or Your Own), Just In Time For The Holidays

by

Lex Gabrielle5 days ago512.9k Views
If you’re looking for something to say, “I love you, happy holidays!!” why not get a chocolate mold of your anus and gift it to your boo? Or, grab a mold of your significant other’s behind to show them just how much you adore their poop shoot. While it seems a bit crazy, and a bit #fakenews, this is the real deal, y’all. If you’re as obsessed with your partner’s ass as they are with yours, show them the right way by making it edible. Edible Anus, a company that specializes in – you guessed it – edible anus’, will send you a box of three chocolate butts for only $10. Magnus Irvin, the owner of Edible Anus, is clearly onto something here.

Irvin came up with this idea in 2006 when he was working on an art exhibit featuring several different color chocolate anus’ (you think he has a type?). He used his own anus apparently, and the product came out a bit messy. But, he came up with the idea to mold other people’s butts and sell them for profit. Even better.

When creating the mold, you’ll have to sit in a bit of an awkward position (obviously), but it’s all worth it for art and glory, am I right? If you’re not into chocolate and think it’s a bit too much like poop coming out of your anus, you can splurge and get your significant other a bronze or silver replica of your anus.

Don’t worry, it will only run you about $500 for them – a perfect price to pay for a beautiful booty-hole. People on Twitter were both amazed and dumbfounded that this is an actual business, but hey, to each their own.

**Jack meoff** · 17-12-2017, 06:42 AM

So wrong

**tomcat** · 17-12-2017, 06:43 AM

Originally Posted by Jack meoff

So wrong

...there's a dark chocolate option available as well...

**David48atTD** · 17-12-2017, 06:47 AM

^^^^

Originally Posted by Luigi

That's where Minty went.

I see the ghost of Minty is strong come this Festive Season

(the wollies and retravision hints were obvious)

---

TC, I did hover over the link when you posted it, saw what the web address read, was eating food ATT,
and decided that 'not now' was a good time to click the link.

**Chittychangchang** · 17-12-2017, 07:50 AM

[QUOTE=Minesbiggerthanyours]Put mine up today.]

I'm sure TC enjoyed it being the season of good will.
Peace be unto you

**tomcat** · 17-12-2017, 08:01 AM

Originally Posted by Chittychangchang

I'm sure TC enjoyed it

I'm always on the lookout for new and exciting gift ideas...

**Chittychangchang** · 17-12-2017, 08:17 AM

Tbf I don't think it's new or exciting.

**Dillinger** · 17-12-2017, 08:21 AM

^ theyre not new.

Someone did a thread on them years back.
https://teakdoor.com/the-teakdoor-lou...atey-mold.html (You Can Now Get A Chocolatey Mold Of Your Butthole For Your Special Valentine)

I see what is new- Bangkok Pride and gay sports festival, now HMs mourning is over, starting Decemenber 23rd.

Go on buy Lulu a badminton raquet

**DJ Pat** · 17-12-2017, 08:21 AM

Those chocolate gay anus's look a bit odd.

Is that supposed to be a turn on ?

Vaginas can look and taste heavenly which enhances any hetero experience.
No wonder gay blokes need to be chem-sexed & drugged up

**tomcat** · 17-12-2017, 08:25 AM

Originally Posted by DJ Pat

No wonder gay blokes need to be chem-sexed & drugged up

...so, that's been your experience, has it?...

**katie23** · 17-12-2017, 09:08 AM

@TC - I thought you didn't believe in Jebus and that stuff? Why all the Xmas cheer at your home?

just kidding - Happy Holidays to you and yours. And may God bless you too!

**Neverna** · 17-12-2017, 10:37 AM

You're not making the mistake of conflating Christmas with religion are you Katy?

**Dillinger** · 17-12-2017, 10:45 AM

^ she did say Happy Holidays

**David48atTD** · 17-12-2017, 04:00 PM

Company Memo.

FROM: Patty Lewis, Teak Door Human Resources Director.
TO: All Mods and Admin.
DATE: November 1, 2017.
RE: Christmas Party.

I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23^rd, starting at noon in the
private function room at the Grill House.

There will be a cash deposit for the bar and plenty of drinks!

We'll have a small band playing traditional Christmas Carols, feel free to sing along.
And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus.!

A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00 PM. Exchanges of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift
should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets.

This gathering is only for employees.!

Our CEO will make a special announcement at that time.!

Merry Christmas to you and your family.

Patty.

---

Company Memo.

FROM: Patty Lewis, Teak Door Human Resources Director.
TO: All Mods and Admin.
DATE: November 2, 2017.
RE: Holiday Party.

In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees.
We recognize that Hanukkah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though
unfortunately not this year.

However, from now on, we're calling it our ‘Holiday Party.’
The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians and to those still celebrating Reconciliation Day.

There will be no Christmas tree and no Christmas carols will be sung.

We will have other types of music for your enjoyment.

Are you happy now.?

Happy Holidays to you and your family.

Patty.

---

Company Memo.

FROM: Patty Lewis, Teak Door Human Resources Director.
TO: All Mods and Admin.DATE: November 3, 2017.
RE: Holiday Party.

Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table,
you didn't sign your name.

I'm happy to accommodate you for this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, ‘AA Only,’ you
wouldn't be anonymous anymore.
So how am I supposed to handle this.?

Somebody.?

And sorry, but forget about the gift exchange, no gifts are allowed since the union members feel that $10.00 is too
much money and the executives believe $10.00 is a little stingy.

REMEMBER: NO GIFTS EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED.

Patty.

---

Company Memo.

FROM: Patty Lewis, Teak Door Human Resources Director.
TO: All Mods and Admin.DATE: November 4, 2017.
RE: Generic Holiday Party.

What a diverse group we are.! I had no idea that December 20^thbegins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which
forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours.

There goes the party.! Seriously, we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our
‘Muslim employees' beliefs.

Perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party or else package everything for you
to take it home in little aluminum foil doggy bag.

Will that work.?

Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit farthest from the dessert buffet, and pregnant women
will get the table closest to the restrooms.

Gays are allowed to sit with each other.
Lesbians do not have to sit with Gay men, and each group will have their own table.
Yes, there will be flower arrangement for the Gay men's table.

To the person asking permission to cross dress, the Grill House asks that no cross-dressing to be allowed,
apparently because of concerns about confusion in the restrooms. ‘Sorry.’

We will have booster seats for short people.

Low-fat food will be available for those on a diet.

I am sorry to report that we cannot control the amount of salt used in the food.
The Grill House suggests that people with high blood pressure taste a bite first.

There will be fresh ‘low sugar’ fruits as dessert for diabetics, but the restaurant cannot supply ‘no sugar’ desserts. ‘Sorry!’

Did I miss anything.???

Patty.

---

Company Memo.

FROM: Patty Lewis, Teak Door Human Resources Director..
TO: All Fucking Mods and Admin.
DATE: November 5, 2017.
RE: The Fucking Holiday Party.

I've had it with you vegetarian pricks.!
We're going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you assholes like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the
table furthest from the ‘grill of death,’ as you so quaintly put it, and you'll get your fucking salad bar, including organic tomatoes.

But do you know that tomatoes have feelings too.
They scream when you slice them. I've heard them scream.

I'm hearing them scream ‘RIGHT FUCKING NOW!’

The rest of you perishing weirdos can kiss my ass.

I hope you all have a rotten holiday.!

Drive drunk and die.

Patty.

---

Company Memo

FROM: Joan Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director.
DATE: November 6, 2017.
RE: Patty Lewis and Holiday Party.

I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery from her recent nervous breakdown
and I'll continue to forward your cards to her at the Hospital.

In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon
of the 23^rd off with full pay.

So ‘Fuck the lot of You and Happy Whatever.!’

Joan.

**tomcat** · 17-12-2017, 05:15 PM

Originally Posted by katie23

I thought you didn't believe in Jebus and that stuff

...your thinking is correct...

Originally Posted by katie23

Why all the Xmas cheer at your home?

Originally Posted by Neverna

You're not making the mistake of conflating Christmas with religion are you Katy?

...see Nev's comment: any excuse for a celebration...

Originally Posted by katie23

Happy Holidays to you and yours

...me and mine return the greeting with good cheer!...

Originally Posted by katie23

may God bless you too

...*sigh*...

**SKkin** · 17-12-2017, 05:39 PM

Originally Posted by Neverna

conflating Christmas with religion

Christ Mass...popish idolatry.

The word "Christmas" is, itself, an unholy mixture of Christ and Mass. "Christ" means "anointed" from the greek word "Cris-tos". To Christians it refers to Jesus as The Christ, but to the catholic it may refer to the Pope as the Vicar of Christ. Popery has declared, the pope ..."holds upon the earth the place of God Almighty,... is Christ in office, jurisdiction and power and ... in clinging to thee (pope) we cling to Christ...." (Vatican Council of 1870). There is good cause to wonder to whom glory is given during the mass. (While the pope of Rome expects his followers to bow or kneel before him, the apostle Peter, whom the Catholic church believes was the “first pope”, forbid anyone to bow before him: “And as Peter was coming in, Cornelius met him, and fell down at his feet, and worshipped him. But Peter took him up, saying, Stand up; I myself also am a man.” Acts 10:25,26.)

The word "mass" comes from the latin root "mittere" (to send) and derives from "missa" (to dismiss). Could "merry christ-mas" actually mean to merrily dismiss Jesus as Christ? (to replace the historical Biblical Christ with the Roman Catholic Christ?)

**Maanaam** · 17-12-2017, 05:40 PM

^^In the spirit of hedging your bets, maybe don't sigh at a well-meaning "God bless".

It's the thought that counts.

**tomcat** · 17-12-2017, 06:10 PM