On the move with Fanny Boy

**somtamslap** · 03-11-2016, 09:15 PM

Fanny Boy, aka the Fanny, aka the big FB, aka the Fantasical Twat, has been musing of late - in between lapping at the minges of horrors of varying degrees on Biiatch Road - that living in Pattaya (aka Twat Town) is starting to take a distinct turn for the tedious. I mean the quality of snatch here is frankly deplorable, both in terms of vaginal structure and taste. Never has the cliche ' i love you long time' been so apt - I mean, the big FB may as well be chucking his cock up the chunnel for all the traction it's getting. ANd don't even talk to me about the some of the flavours left lingering on the palate - it was only last week that Fanny Boy ate a portion of twat that tasted like it had been fermenting in a jar of stagnant buffalo piss for the past six months. The Fanny - aka the Fantastical Twat - had rotten minge on the belch for a fortnight.

With this in mind, Fanny Boy has decided that a trip to Isaan is in order. Fanny Boy has heard word from various figures of social authority here in Pattaya (Sid, owner of the Pug's Pussy bar and grill; Harry, perennial pisshead with an ear to the ground; and Kev, octogenrian septic who came directly from Da Nang and never went back to Milwaukee) that North-East Thailand is bristling with babes, and there's nothing the Big FB likes more than a palatable fanny or five. Fanny Boy has also been in formed that it costs less than a quid Sterling to get battered for a week, and this Lao Khao is well worth sipping - a wee digestif after the main course of minge.

Fanny Boy, aka the Fanny, aka the Big FB, aka the Fantastical Twat, has indeed had his interest well and truly piqued - and it's off to the bus station via Beach Road for the Twat Man.

**david44** · 03-11-2016, 09:19 PM

Now that's entertainment

Pie awarded

**crackerjack101** · 03-11-2016, 09:21 PM

Disagree. Not one of your best Som.

**somtamslap** · 03-11-2016, 09:31 PM

Originally Posted by crackerjack101

Not one of your best Som.

Who is this Som? Fanny Boy - aka the Fantastical Twat - here. Spreadin' the gospel like wild fire...

Originally Posted by david44

Pie awarded

Got any minge flan? Send that shit COD to the Big FB.

**Dillinger** · 03-11-2016, 09:35 PM

^^ its only a laugh;Fanny Boy's not really on his way to yours

**crackerjack101** · 03-11-2016, 09:45 PM

Originally Posted by Dillinger

Fanny Boy's not really on his way to yours

Oh, how disappointing.
I know it's only a laugh it's just not written as well as he has done in the past.
just my opinion.
Carry on.

**Dillinger** · 03-11-2016, 09:47 PM

Originally Posted by crackerjack101

it's just not written as well as he has done in the past.

Maybe you could show him where he could improve?

**thaimeme** · 03-11-2016, 09:49 PM

Originally Posted by crackerjack101

Disagree. Not one of your best Som.

Agreed....and I appreciate Slappy's work.
He'd benefit by returning to his roots.

Deeper familiar Isaan, Thai, Thailand references would be the desired move.

Nonetheless....keep on keepin' on Slap.

**crackerjack101** · 03-11-2016, 10:01 PM

Originally Posted by Dillinger

Maybe you could show him where he could improve?

Sure, the first paragraph is way to heavy on the crudity. It's not particularly funny because it's so dense.

Observational reportage needs to be balanced.
Humour can drown you and then it's not funny. IMO.

The second is better with some nice characterisations. A much pleasanter read.

**somtamslap** · 03-11-2016, 10:02 PM

Slap is now Fanny Boy - and this is his desired style of telling a tale, or spittin' shit - as the Fantastical Twat would have it.

**Neverna** · 03-11-2016, 10:09 PM

It's OK so far. It's just the aperitif, lads. Wait till the story hops on the bus and gets up to Isaan. It'll get fannier for sure.

**crackerjack101** · 03-11-2016, 10:09 PM

Originally Posted by somtamslap

Slap is now Fanny Boy - and this is his desired style of telling a tale, or spittin' shit - as the Fantastical Twat would have it.

Ok.

R.I.P. somtamslap who could write quite well.

**snakeeyes** · 03-11-2016, 10:10 PM

I miss Por ,

**nidhogg** · 03-11-2016, 10:14 PM

Big fan of slaps work. But a big "nope" from me i am afraid.

**snakeeyes** · 03-11-2016, 10:16 PM

^
Bring back Danny Boy ,

**Dillinger** · 03-11-2016, 10:20 PM

Tough crowd Slapper.

Some piccies should sway em.

**somtamslap** · 03-11-2016, 10:22 PM

To reiterate, this is a Fanny Boy - aka the Big FB - original piece of artistry. Brrrap, Brrrap.

**Dillinger** · 03-11-2016, 10:25 PM

A grammattical error and a typo before the tefllers put the boot in as well mate

Originally Posted by somtamslap

in formed

Originally Posted by somtamslap

Brrrap

**somtamslap** · 03-11-2016, 10:35 PM

Originally Posted by Dillinger

A grammattical error and a typo before the tefllers put the boot in as well mate

The Fantastical Twat couldn't care a jot about grammattical (sic) errors.

**Dillinger** · 03-11-2016, 10:42 PM

......

**thaimeme** · 03-11-2016, 10:48 PM

Originally Posted by snakeeyes

I miss Por ,

As do most, I suspect.

Slap killed off the quite distinguished Por.
Heathen.

**somtamslap** · 04-11-2016, 12:08 AM

Originally Posted by thaimeme

Slap killed off the quite distinguished Por.

On the contrary - I'm certain the Big FB will meet Por during his sabbatical. And I'm sure they will get drunk and talk about fanny - the Fantastical Twat's most favourite subject.

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