Thread: West vs East: The great big dumping dispute

West vs East: The great... 24-04-2016 05:15 PM thaimeme Yeah....let it run up against the prostate - FEELS SOOO GOOD!!

Oh dear god.

Originally Posted by pseudolus

West vs East: The great... 24-04-2016 05:15 PM thaimeme Yeah....let it run up against the prostate - FEELS SOOO GOOD!!

Oh dear god.

Heh....

Originally Posted by thaimeme

Originally Posted by pseudolus

West vs East: The great... 24-04-2016 05:15 PM thaimeme Yeah....let it run up against the prostate - FEELS SOOO GOOD!!

Oh dear god.

Heh....

well that will teach you to gayboy it up on my Repo!

If no bum gun, take your shit just before a shower, also useful if you've got a new GF and you don't share eachother crapping secrets just yet. The shower noise masks the sound o you laying your eggs


If you got no shower, God help you

I often wonder how gays get round the improperly cleaned arse syndrome

Originally Posted by DJ Pat

If no bum gun, take your shit just before a shower, also useful if you've got a new GF and you don't share eachother crapping secrets just yet. The shower noise masks the sound o you laying your eggs


If you got no shower, God help you

I often wonder how gays get round the improperly cleaned arse syndrome

How do you know if your mate is gay?
His cock tastes like shit.

Many a true word spoken in jest !

For reasons of public health I always use antiseptic hand wash after handling money received from gays. I do not want to be passing faecal infected notes and coin to my bus passengers.

I usually only handle coins in my meagre existence
When I run out of bog paper I use newpaper or coffee filters

Thanks for that tip.

Originally Posted by Munted

For reasons of public health I always use antiseptic hand wash after handling money received from gays. I do not want to be passing faecal infected notes and coin to my bus passengers.

But how do you know if they're gay or not? Is it the way they walk?

Originally Posted by DJ Pat

When I run out of bog paper I use newpaper or coffee filters

When I run out of bog roll I get some more.

Originally Posted by DJ Pat

coffee filters

You made yourself a bum gun yet, Slap, or still producing skidmarks?

Originally Posted by pseudolus

You made yourself a bum gun yet, Slap, or still producing skidmarks?

Still strutting around with dirty underpants I'm afraid. Although if you can manipulate you arse so that it fits right into the lavatory bowl, a good flush or two gets rid of the worst.

I bet for a quid one of those Romanian car wash places will do the job for you. On your bike wearing your granddads trapdoor thermal all in one underwear "Ooiii ugly coont, give the boot the once over".

Originally Posted by Cujo

Originally Posted by Munted

For reasons of public health I always use antiseptic hand wash after handling money received from gays. I do not want to be passing faecal infected notes and coin to my bus passengers.

But how do you know if they're gay or not? Is it the way they walk?

Well there are the overt ones with the gay walk and limp wrists but of course there are others who almost appear normal. So if in doubt one should do the antiseptic hand wash. Just think about it. There have been times when I have rubbed my knob when attending to a pissing requirement. I dare say there are a few females who sometimes give themselves a bit of a clit rub whilst pissing. You cannot tell me that some gays do not hold back on a little anus massage whilst having a dump. They are shit lovers. In terms of public health a little bit of piss is relatively benign but faecal matter is much more nasty.

Originally Posted by Munted

Originally Posted by Cujo

Originally Posted by Munted

For reasons of public health I always use antiseptic hand wash after handling money received from gays. I do not want to be passing faecal infected notes and coin to my bus passengers.

But how do you know if they're gay or not? Is it the way they walk?

Well there are the overt ones with the gay walk and limp wrists but of course there are others who almost appear normal. So if in doubt one should do the antiseptic hand wash. Just think about it. There have been times when I have rubbed my knob when attending to a pissing requirement. I dare say there are a few females who sometimes give themselves a bit of a clit rub whilst pissing. You cannot tell me that some gays do not hold back on a little anus massage whilst having a dump. They are shit lovers. In terms of public health a little bit of piss is relatively benign but faecal matter is much more nasty.

Do you wash the money as well in case it gets mixed up with other ungayed money and you inadvertently handle it again?
What about when you receive money off a straight person who's just received it off a gay? You have no way of knowing.
I think in future, just to be on the safe side, before accepting money you need to ask the customer if the person he got that money from walked funny or had a limp wrist.

Unless I am missing something here, this is a thread about wiping your arse.
And I actually read most of the posts. Oh God, I have to get a life, but I fear it's too late.

Originally Posted by ChookRaffle Jones

Unless I am missing something here, this is a thread about wiping your arse.
And I actually read most of the posts. Oh God, I have to get a life, but I fear it's too late.

More a thread about hosing down your arse.

Just returned from a 3 week stint in the UK. Nice cool weather, hills and scenery for walking / running etc. but any tiny smidge of unwiped fecal matter can quickly be re-distributed around it's point of origin, leading to uncomfortable chafing, and soreness. The 4yo kid is a total other story, btw..

Was nice to re-enter the comparative civilization of Toyland, and take a dignified dump that doesn't involve 3 Andrex puppie's worth of bog roll.

Originally Posted by Cujo

You have no way of knowing.

You are right but that's no excuse to give up. Some drivers wear white gloves but that's a bit too gay for my liking.

On Uk tv there's an ad for'' extra thick velvet'' toilet paper and several people tell us how they feel after wiping theitr arse with it.

Obviously they all dry wipers, I couldn't imagine anything more foul than picturing these filthy shit smearers cleaning their ringpieces while blocking their toilets with a huge pile of shitty paper.

In a few films you see the actor taking a shit then using three sheets of tissue to wipe without even looking down to see how shitted the paper is. Cleary setting a bad example

Originally Posted by DJ Pat

In a few films you see the actor taking a shit then using three sheets of tissue to wipe without even looking down to see how shitted the paper is.

Really?
Name one?

JUlianne Moore in Still Alice, she sits on the bog, farting sounds aplenty, then takes 2-3 sheets, wipes without looking and flushes, stand up and pulls her knickers up.

Then she was playing an alzeimers sufferer at the time, as she was crapping with the door open in full view of her family