A chemical romance in Krungthep - aka - fear and loathing on soi 4

**somtamslap** · 18-01-2016, 02:07 PM

A true and cautionary tale.

Turn the link inside-out...

Fear And Loathing On Sukhumvit Soi 4 | What's On Sukhumvit

**david44** · 18-01-2016, 02:28 PM

9999 on its head
Les be honest you wubbed every moment of the jumble jews filled yer wubba johnny and sloppedsometime soon back for more foreplay. Siam once under the foreskin is a hard mistress to forget, somewho playing tiddlywanks in wuwal Slurry Khvnt or the Middlesex bars of Soho aint the same. I shall await our interlocution in George Street anon as I've been imformed my thoughts are unwanted here by Archangel skidlog and his beadle hairybeerywoofta, Adieu
Wat Saul Thisthen
Post6666

**Seekingasylum** · 18-01-2016, 03:22 PM

Some nice imagery and a good narrative maintained with pace but perhaps a little overwrought. Less is often more but I believe I have said this before to you on several occasions. You seem to be still caught up in the conceit of writing and your style is a tad self conscious.

Do you have an editor you can use?

**kingwilly** · 18-01-2016, 05:19 PM

I liked it. I'm not sure that an English teacher would have made it to class, not even sweating of beer chang after a night off ruphies.

**baldrick** · 18-01-2016, 06:40 PM

Originally Posted by Seekingasylum

but perhaps a little overwrought

the piece is meant to fire up the imagination and trigger memories

and probably launch thousands of overweight ,5 foot tall, socks and sandal wearers with bald heads and bad teeth onto aircraft - destination siam

**klong toey** · 18-01-2016, 07:24 PM

It conjures up memories of chang induced liver ache and away nights playing for the pool team.

**somtamslap** · 18-01-2016, 08:53 PM

Originally Posted by Seekingasylum

Do you have an editor you can use?

I think these web pieces are given a once over by the site owner/s.

Originally Posted by kingwilly

I'm not sure that an English teacher would have made it to class, not even sweating of beer chang after a night off ruphies.

Ah, but William - this is a true story.

Originally Posted by baldrick

and probably launch thousands of overweight ,5 foot tall, socks and sandal wearers with bald heads and bad teeth onto aircraft - destination siam

Abso-bloody-lutely balders. Some people just need a nudge in the right direction.

Originally Posted by klong toey

It conjures up memories of chang induced liver ache

Memories? Dear boy, imbibing beer chang chould never be a memory. It should be a daily fcucking occurence.

**klong toey** · 18-01-2016, 09:52 PM

Originally Posted by somtamslap

Memories? Dear boy, imbibing beer chang chould never be a memory.

Given up on the chang still have the odd bottle but its back to me roots,cider.
No liver ache, no changover, no sleeping on the floor at nights

i guess its a sign of old age creeping up on me.
I still manage to down 3 pints of cider in 20 minutes sat in Denny's most nights after our stroll in the park though.

**Topper** · 18-01-2016, 10:03 PM

"Maniacally scrabbling around his bag and pockets, he found that his telephone was also missing – and at the next available opportunity pecked out an email to George, keen to sketch out some semblance of the preceding events."

Could be better....

**thaimeme** · 18-01-2016, 10:07 PM

Rather disappointed.

We'd prefer your own original material, Slap [with all due respect].
Much more entertaining.

**somtamslap** · 19-01-2016, 03:34 AM

Originally Posted by thaimeme

We'd prefer your own original material, Slap

I'll pitch one of Por's indiscretions and see if it swims. There's still bundles of untold Pater in-law scarred upon my brain.

**Chittychangchang** · 19-01-2016, 04:28 AM

This, thought George, was up there with one of the best days of his life – including the time he seven-balled old Mickey Kendall in the Red Lion in Doncaster.

**kingwilly** · 19-01-2016, 05:47 AM

I suppose I, erm my friends came close to some nights like that back in the day.

**DJ Pat** · 19-01-2016, 07:17 AM

George is a fucking idiot - who the hell drags their suitcases to a gogo bar?

Bit of a short read, and no back story about how he got to the beach, I'm assuming he was bundled onto a bus from Ekkamai whilst still comatose?
And if so, how did he haul his ass from the bus station to the beach?

Plot holes....unless you're planning an extended screenplay then a film

**somtamslap** · 19-01-2016, 03:41 PM

Originally Posted by DJ Pat

who the hell drags their suitcases to a gogo bar?

Gogo bar?

No, Patrick. No gogo bars were involved during the making of these events.

Gogo bars are sooooo last century.

**withnallstoke** · 19-01-2016, 03:50 PM

Originally Posted by DJ Pat

how he got to the beach,

Flight was pre booked.

I assume.

**somtamslap** · 19-01-2016, 03:55 PM

^ and the truth - will set you freeeeeeeeeeeee!

**kingwilly** · 19-01-2016, 05:17 PM

Originally Posted by DJ Pat

George is a fucking idiot - who the hell drags their suitcases to a gogo bar?

Plenty of people. I've seen the entire Hong Kong Dragons Football club go to soi cowboy with their bags since they were leaving immediately afterwards*

*Some of them forgot to pay their bills. but since they missed their flights returned to the scene of the crime and were 'forced' to pay up.

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