Thread: The Chipper Kipper

So there I was in Ullapool, Scotland at a nice hotel which included breakfast. I was waiting for the ferry to the Isle of Lewis.

I go down to breakfast, looking forward to another fine full Scottish spread.
The waiter says something incomprehensible(the accent there is really thick) to me and points to a buffet table. I look at the buffet table and see a big pot of milky porridge and some smaller dishes with stewed prunes canned pears...my heart sank (camping I eat porridge every day). I inquire form the waiter "is that it?" again something incomprehensible and points me to a table. I have a seat order some tea, then they bring a little menu, with my choices; the full Scottish or kippers. The buffet table was just the side dishes. Enormously relieved I decide to have kippers since I never had them for breakfast before. They ask if I want one or two. Thinking a kipper is something small I say two. I have a bowl of porridge and some prunes while I waited.
After a while the kippers come along, I'm presented with two large beautifully smoked fish, each a good 10" long, almost hanging off the edge of the plate. it was huge amount of fish!
While I'm working away at these to kippers some Americans arrive and start eyeballing the big kippers on my plate. I think they were quandary over deciding between black pudding or kippers, I notice their interest and affirm that these kippers were mighty good, but just order one. The lady asks if they weren't too fishy. I assure her they were delicious. As I'm thinking,"not too fishy" jeez lady they're fish for crying out loud!
So I dutifully clean my plate, I was quite full. Almost painfully so.

A bit later while packing my moto back up I see the lady heading for her tour bus, we have a little small about my journey, which kinda shocked them I was travelling alone like that. I inquire how she liked the kippers, she didn't, and couldn't eat them. I chuckled to myself counting my blessings not having to travel with fussy folks like that.
That's my chipper kipper story!