Thread: Moral Dilemma -Shart after effects

So I was in a pub last night, and the chap I think is the owner clearly had shat himself. A large dried brown stain in the crease of his shorts which I suppose meant that some effluent juice had slipped out and been soaked into his cotton shorts. There was a bit of a whiff when he was in close vicinity and I do not think I was the only person to spot this. The place was busy, and he knew a lot of those so clearly they were regulars. He had had a few, and was doing a very good job as the bon viveur host of the gaff.

At the time I decided if I knew the bloke I would have had a quiet word in his ear to let him know. If it were me, I would want to know after all. But not knowing him, and being our first time in the place, I don't think it was my place to tell him, and that one of his friends there should have told him, but they didn't. So should I have told him?

Seek a new pub.

Originally Posted by blue bar

Seek a new pub.

Its not a place we would be going back to anyway, regardless of poop pants the land lord who seemed a decent guy.

Wait until he walks past and then loudly say "Christ, what a pong!"
Look around to make sure you have everyone's attntion and then point at his arse and yell
"Look, that dirty bastard has shat himself!"
In the ensuing commotion, do a runner on your checkbin yelling "Pat's me name, dodgings me game!"

If you shat yourself, you generally know about it.

Are you sure the proprietor in question is free to socially interact?

Holler "Hey, Skidmarks. No, not you. You." Point clearly to his rear.

^What was that! LT to much time on your hands. I'm ashamed that I even watched it....

^ well warned.

Name and shame FFS!

the correct procedure in such situations is to make a video and immediately upload it to facebook, you tube, twitter and the appropriately named live leak.

a man who shits himself in public is clearly not a gentleman and could never be a friend.

^ (or a relative)

Originally Posted by Necron99

Wait until he walks past and then loudly say "Christ, what a pong!"
Look around to make sure you have everyone's attntion and then point at his arse and yell
"Look, that dirty bastard has shat himself!"
In the ensuing commotion, do a runner on your checkbin yelling "Pat's me name, dodgings me game!"

Quality. I did think about it. Where is Pat? In prison somewhere?

Originally Posted by somtamslap

If you shat yourself, you generally know about it.

Are you sure the proprietor in question is free to socially interact?

I've lived in Asia long enough to never trust a fart, and agree. If you shit yourself, you know about it. The thought occurs now that he might have shat himself on another day, forgotten about the mess in the shorts, and slung them on last night having forgotten the rear guard had seen some gravy action.

Originally Posted by Kurgen

Name and shame FFS!

PJ's - Hadn't been there before, driving past, fancied a beer.
It's not for me.

Originally Posted by taxexile

the correct procedure in such situations is to make a video and immediately upload it to facebook, you tube, twitter and the appropriately named live leak.

a man who shits himself in public is clearly not a gentleman and could never be a friend.

Never thought of taking a picture - However, I know lots of gentlemen who have shat themselves in public; a sly fart that drops a slippery warning into your pants that the food you had earlier was not hygienically prepared.

However, I know lots of gentlemen who have shat themselves in public; a sly fart that drops a slippery warning

your acquaintances were nothing more than bounders, a gentleman would discreetly remove himself from company before releasing a fart, sly or otherwise.

Originally Posted by taxexile

However, I know lots of gentlemen who have shat themselves in public; a sly fart that drops a slippery warning

your acquaintances were nothing more than bounders, a gentleman would discreetly remove himself from company before releasing a fart, sly or otherwise.

I thought you were inferring "outside of ones private residence" when saying "in public"

Originally Posted by taxexile

the correct procedure in such situations is to make a video and immediately upload it to facebook, you tube, twitter and the appropriately named live leak.

a man who shits himself in public is clearly not a gentleman and could never be a friend.

Wearing darker coloured trousers would certainly help.

Originally Posted by taxexile

your acquaintances were nothing more than bounders, a gentleman would discreetly remove himself from company before releasing a fart, sly or otherwise.

You sound like the kind of bloke who get's out of the bath to have a piss.

^
now that would be silly.

Originally Posted by chassamui

You sound like the kind of bloke who get's out of the bath to have a piss

Mate - surely you meant "Gets out of the shower to take a piss"?

Originally Posted by Albert Shagnastier

Mate - surely you meant "Gets out of the shower to take a piss"?

Only merkins 'take' the piss.

^Cool bro - but pissing in the bath you're sitting in is a bit pikey (sorry Dave)

Originally Posted by pseudolus

I've lived in Asia long enough to never trust a fart, and agree. If you shit yourself, you know about it. The thought occurs now that he might have shat himself on another day, forgotten about the mess in the shorts, and slung them on last night having forgotten the rear guard had seen some gravy action.

Pseudolus,

How much time per day average do you spend looking at other men's asses?

Do you look at your own prior to exit from the loo?

How often do you shit yourself? When laughing, farting or hammering away on that take out from Nana?

At what age does one loose bowel control?

If You shit yourself, do you remove your underwear and deposit them in the nearest trash can? Or do you discretely launder them in the toilet bowl and stuff them into a soggy batch of wipes?

Lastly I have always farted while walking through department stores. Do you think anyone notices?

Originally Posted by chassamui

Originally Posted by Albert Shagnastier

Mate - surely you meant "Gets out of the shower to take a piss"?

Only merkins 'take' the piss.

Why would you do your business in either? The toilet is in the same room why not use it? Surly Chassamui you've got no toilet manners whatsoever. Don't blame merkins for your own vices. Do you piss the bed as well? Just asking like....

Originally Posted by ltnt

Originally Posted by pseudolus

I've lived in Asia long enough to never trust a fart, and agree. If you shit yourself, you know about it. The thought occurs now that he might have shat himself on another day, forgotten about the mess in the shorts, and slung them on last night having forgotten the rear guard had seen some gravy action.

Pseudolus,

How much time per day average do you spend looking at other men's asses?

Do you look at your own prior to exit from the loo?

How often do you shit yourself? When laughing, farting or hammering away on that take out from Nana?

At what age does one loose bowel control?

If You shit yourself, do you remove your underwear and deposit them in the nearest trash can? Or do you discretely launder them in the toilet bowl and stuff them into a soggy batch of wipes?

Lastly I have always farted while walking through department stores. Do you think anyone notices?

Pure class, Int....

We've all shit ourselves at one time or another.

Originally Posted by thaimeme

We've all shit ourselves at one time or another.

I've fallen down stairs and out of buildings and moving vehicles.

I've woken up covered in blood wearing a pair of sunglasses in the gutter.

I've fought with police on 4 continents

And I've taken more pisses in corners of the wrong rooms than you've had hot dinners.

But I have never never never , ever, fvcking ever shat my fvcking pants.

You should be ashamed of yourself Rurin